# Oh, My Freaking God! (Looong!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 13, 2003, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128 "2003-07-13T07:55:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 31
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/601 "2003-08-14T23:11:26Z")
Nein, danke. ---
**Author:** ![tanookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/48db29/32.png) [@tanookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanookie)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/602 "2003-08-14T23:16:58Z")
Ya know they also have ‘toy parties’ and they go quite well in conjunction with lingere parties… maybe you will be the only guy at a combo toy/naughty nightie party and the ladies will all want your discerning opinion 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/603 "2003-08-14T23:18:58Z")
wow … that C.P.R. stuff _really_ works! ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/604 "2003-08-14T23:21:12Z")
:o THAT is “embarassment”??!?? wow… I thought it was well … way closer to “swollow” ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2003, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/605 "2003-08-14T23:22:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > Aw, crap! I was hoping that having someone I knew, there, would keep _me_ from crawling into my shell. I’m the same way. I can do one-on-one, no problem. But, groups scare the crap out of me! I don’t know anyone else who comes close to fitting the parameters, though, so I guess I’ll have to go solo. I’ll just have to see if I can muddle through, because I’m not backing down. I wanted a different lifestyle, and this is certainly different. In that case, I’m depending on you afterwards to tell me that it was great, and you had the time of your life, and I shouldn’t have missed it, and I’m an idiot. ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/606 "2003-08-15T00:20:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ForumBot \* > \*\*☹ I’m so alone… \*\* Sorry. Existentialism Hour is from 3:59 to 4 am. Try again, tomorrow. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by White Ink \* > \*\*Nein, danke. \*\* Sie sind willkommen. Informieren Sie mich, wenn Sie Ihren Verstand ändern. 😉 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tanookie \* > \*\*Ya know they also have ‘toy parties’ and they go quite well in conjunction with lingere parties… maybe you will be the only guy at a combo toy/naughty nightie party and the ladies will all want your discerning opinion 🙂 \*\* Well, the host is male, so I wouldn’t be the _only_ guy there. And, I’m making no assumptions about his sexuality, despite those Tupperware rumors. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wyatt \* > \*\*:o THAT is “embarassment”??!?? > wow… I thought it was well … way closer to “swollow” \*\* Sad, isn’t it? I think the designer should be the one to be embarassed. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Robot Arm \* > **In that case, I’m depending on you afterwards to tell me that it was great, and you had the time of your life, and I shouldn’t have missed it, and I’m an idiot.** You shouldn’t miss it, and you’re an idiot. What? Oh! _After_ the party! Sorry. 😃 Well, if I’m not kidnapped and shipped off to the Orient to be a sex slave, you can count on me. ---
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/607 "2003-08-15T00:33:47Z")
Verstimmt 😉 ---
**Author:** ![KP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a9adbd/32.png) [@KP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/608 "2003-08-15T00:39:02Z")
> [@](#): > > **Wyatt** informed us: > > Ya know, I think there was a place in SF that would let you order a pizza with oral sex … but the pizza was pretty poor … went out of business, I hear … Well, I know at least one place in the Boston area (possibly of more interest to Davebear) with _good_ pizza where I could order a pizza and oral sex… … ‘order’, sure, but there’s a big sign in the window reading “WE DON’T DELIVER” ---
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/609 "2003-08-15T00:41:27Z")
Oohhh! Page 13, cool! (how come we aren’t allowed to edit our posts?) ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/610 "2003-08-15T00:44:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KP \* > \*\*… there’s a big sign in the window reading “WE DON’T DELIVER” \*\* I believe that was the title for the thread about **D.Bear’s** life, in that subject area, for the most recent decade … well, till he met Harmony and/or any of the others from his rapidly burgeoning ‘[Match.Com](http://Match.Com)’ admirers … ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/611 "2003-08-15T00:48:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > \*\*Sie sind willkommen. Informieren Sie mich, wenn Sie Ihren Verstand ändern. 😉 > \*\* [nitpick] Mein Deutsch ist nicht so gut, aber … isn’t _ **bitte** _ the more correct response to _ **danke** _. [/nitpick] You’re in a delightfully cheery posting mood today, Dave. Something we should know about? 😃 By the way, no clues here for ya, dude. Sorry. I sold my last one two weeks ago. Supplier says they’re on a 12-week backorder and I’m in desperate need of a few myself! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/612 "2003-08-15T00:59:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > \*\* Anyone else find this confusing? Where’s **Wyatt**? This sounds like _his_ native language. > > How are ya’, Little Flaming Hamster? :)\*\* You off all people should know that I specilize in being confusing sometimes. 😉 😃 Not really a fan or proponent of casual sex (or [Match.com](http://Match.com)), but if you personally need something to get through your bad times… well, far be it from me to judge. (it’s not like I’m the recipient of it, after all… oops, did I jsut say that?) I’m not too bad at all… finished a Chinese Reading and Writing Class a while ago, and am currently chilling with friends. (heck, it’s summer) Might even have one of my infamous get-togethers at my place later this month. (which are only infamous because my brother jokes that I’ll buy 20 or 100 kegs of alcohol for each party that I host, and have frat boys sleeping a major driniking session off the morning after) Right now, I’m a little confused as well. I just had someone on the telephone asking if this was the mall. When I said no, she wanted to know if this was SportChek… nope! Then she verified the phone number, which was _my_ phone number! :eek: Weird stuff, though it reminds me of what happened back in February. Then, I had some dude calling to ask if this was Coast Mountain Sports. Hmm… my number can’t really be that of the local sports stores around here! (otherwise I’d have a lot more calls of this nature) So that’s how I am, in the proverbial nutshell. F\_X ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/613 "2003-08-15T01:02:49Z")
Of course, that should have read “you **of** all people…” As for clues, I’m fresh out. I gave my last one to **Spoz** yesterday, and I’m just waiting for my next shipment of them. (possibly via my Denver friend Corey, or maybe [G](http://www.fearofflying.com.au/g)) Sorry I can’t be more helpful, dude. 🙂 F\_X ---
**Author:** ![KP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a9adbd/32.png) [@KP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/614 "2003-08-15T01:18:29Z")
BTW, **Dave** , since we’re from the same area, and my head is shaven, I was wondering if you might be interested in a cooperative proposition. You see, to me, giving oral to a lady is almost as much fun as consummation, but I’ve never particularly enjoyed recieving (I mean, sure, it’s okay -a gent should be open to enjoying almost any form of play with a suitable, willing and attractive lady - but it’s not in my top 50%) . This has sometimes caused a certain (not _my_ words) “power imbalance”. that I’ve never dared to discuss, until a recent thread made me realize I wasn’t alone. I realize I can’t complain if a lady wants to give, since that’s my gig, too, but I am afraid the enthusiasm of my response often falls short of their expectations, and I hate to disappoint Anyway, I was thinking… you seem like a guy who’d go the extra mile for a friend, even a newly-made one. Might we discuss the possibility of… well, at those awkward moments where gender politics rears its ugly head, I could really use a fellow baldie on re-dial to route those often intrusive BJ’s to. I promise not to reveal our arrangement, even to our felloe SDMB’ers who are similarly afflicted. It’'d be raw self-interest: I wouldn’t dare kill the deal by spreading your altruism too far. Bitte, Sei ein mensch, Herr Bear! Hilf mal einen Doper aus! ---
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/615 "2003-08-15T01:26:23Z")
“ain’t nothing wrong with helping a buddy out” “sock, sock, soccer practice” ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/616 "2003-08-15T02:43:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KP \* > \*\*Well, I know at least one place in the Boston area (possibly of more interest to Davebear) with _good_ pizza where I could order a pizza and oral sex… > > … ‘order’, sure, but there’s a big sign in the window reading “WE DON’T DELIVER” \*\* LOL! I know a couple places in Hampton Beach that should have those signs. 😉 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by White Ink \* > \*\*Oohhh! Page 13, cool! (how come we aren’t allowed to edit our posts?) \*\* We can’t be trusted with something so important. :dubious: > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by peritrochoid \* > **[nitpick] Mein Deutsch ist nicht so gut, aber … isn’t bitte the more correct response to danke. [/nitpick]** Nope. Bitte = please, danke = thank you, wilkommen = welcome. > [@](#): > > \*\*You’re in a delightfully cheery posting mood today, Dave. Something we should know about? 😃 \*\* Nah. Just in a strange mood. Or, what was the word? Weird, I think. > [@](#): > > \*\*By the way, no clues here for ya, dude. Sorry. I sold my last one two weeks ago. Supplier says they’re on a 12-week backorder and I’m in desperate need of a few myself! 😉 \*\* Yeah, well demand has always outstripped the supply. Maybe I can find one on eBay. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Flamsterette\_X \* > \*\*You off all people should know that I specilize in being confusing sometimes. 😉 😃 Not really a fan or proponent of casual sex (or [Match.com](http://Match.com)), but if you personally need something to get through your bad times… well, far be it from me to judge. (it’s not like I’m the recipient of it, after all… oops, did I jsut say that?) \*\* Yes, I’m pretty sure that was you who said it. But, you’re safe. You’re way too far away, and way too young for me. Even if I _could_ understand what you were saying. 😉 Besides, Match isn’t really about casual sex; it’s about dating. What you do on your dates is up to you. There are other sites devoted to sexual encounters, but who has time? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KP \* > \*\*You see, to me, giving oral to a lady is almost as much fun as consummation, \*\* Well, I’m with ya’, up to that point. I actually feel the same way. It may even be _more_ fun, though that’s splitting curly hairs. > [@](#): > > \*\* but I’ve never particularly enjoyed recieving \*\* Well, now you’ve lost me. Can’t even conceive of that notion. > [@](#): > > \*\* Anyway, I was thinking… you seem like a guy who’d go the extra mile for a friend, even a newly-made one. Might we discuss the possibility of… well, at those awkward moments where gender politics rears its ugly head, I could really use a fellow baldie on re-dial to route those often intrusive BJ’s to. \*\* Lemme see if I’ve got this straight. You’ve got an excessive number of women who want to perform oral sex on you, and you’re looking to pawn them off on me. As in, have them come give me head, instead of giving it to you. :dubious: And, you think they’d go along with that? Well, even assuming they would, (Is everybody sitting down?) I’d still have to pass. I’d like to help you out, but that’s just not me. I wouldn’t think you’d have too hard a time finding another bald guy who would be willing to be the beneficiary of your largesse, though. I appreciate the offer, and everything, but it’s a little too casual for me. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by White Ink \* > \*\* “ain’t nothing wrong with helping a buddy out” “sock, sock, soccer practice” \*\* Couldn’t beat the weirdos, so you decided to join them? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/617 "2003-08-15T07:22:48Z")
\*Ponders if I pumped a bit Too hard, or something, in doing that thread C.P.R. … its gotten to where \>\>I’m\<\< one of the Really Normal sounding posters! _ponders the deep profound meaning that Must be contained in “sock, sock, soccer practice.”_ ---
**Author:** ![mipiace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb9ed0/32.png) [@mipiace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mipiace)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2003, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/618 "2003-08-15T12:57:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by peritrochoid \* > \*\ ***mipiace** , from my perspective, clear, one-to-one, honest communication is one of the most underrated tools in relationships (budding or established) these days. People who are mature enough to know better will completely neglect it sometimes. I agree with your thoughts and think you and **Studmuffin** should have a heart to heart chat about where each of you stands and what you expect from the other. Sure, give him another chance, but be honest with him and yourself and make it clear where the boundaries are and what the consequences are for crossing them. Then be true to your word. I know, it’s really easy for me to say that as an outsider, but I think it is important. Just don’t leave any doubts. Easier said than done, I know, and I’m not sure it’s even possible to be completely doubt-free. > > A slight tangent; Dave’s situation is a prime example of what happens when communication is a one-sided affair. I have been on both sides of the coin, and I’ve found his situation pretty agonizing at times. Knowing that, I won’t be able leave someone hanging again. Make sure you _both_ are hearing each other. > > IMOO. 🙂 > In My Oddball Opinion \*\* Thanks Peritrochoid for being brave enough to reply…you rock! I missed your post somehow. I’m pretty sure I will make myself clear…😉 ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/619 "2003-08-16T03:32:52Z")
I’m hearing crickets. That can’t be a good sign. Oh, wait. The window’s open. Nevermind. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wyatt \* > \*\*\*Ponders if I pumped a bit Too hard, or something, \*\* Got a bruised…nevermind. Don’t mind me. I just was in a sex thread. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mipiace \* > **Thanks Peritrochoid for being brave enough to reply…** LOL! Bear-baiting? It’s a dangerous sport, you know. I refused to get sucked in, before, because I know you. But, if you insist on an answer, I’ll give you one. An honest one, but I guarantee you won’t like it, and you’ll go into denial/attack mode, if your past behavior is any indicator. Mini-Update: I spent the evening home alone, which should be good news to some of you. But, I did have another round of email exchanges with Monica, of party invitation fame, and we’re going to meet for coffee or soda, before the party, tomorrow. So, if that goes well, I’ll go to the party with her. If not, well, I guess I can always go to the Dopefest. Harmony may be getting a little obsessive, and I’m not sure what to do about that. We had a nice chat on the phone, but she seems to get a bit upset at the idea that I may meet or date someone else. It strikes me as being kind of early in the relationship for that attitude, so it makes me a little nervous. Especially given her dating situation. No word, yet, from the one who wanted to meet. And, of course, no word from Theresa. ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2003, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/620 "2003-08-16T16:07:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mipiace \* > \*\*Thanks Peritrochoid for being brave enough to reply…you rock! I missed your post somehow. I’m pretty sure I will make myself clear…😉 \*\* wow, thanks, **mipiace**! Haven’t heard “you rock!” addressed to me in a while. ::blushing:: afraid to use the blushing/embarrassed smiley after the … umm … lively debate. 😉 Hey, **Wyatt**! You may be _Cool and Everything, But®_ … but our dear **mipiace** says _ **I rock!** _😃 😃 If **Davebear’s** prior post is any indication, maybe I was being something other than _brave_… Being kind to myself, the word _naïve_ handily comes to mind. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=30) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=32)