# Oh, My Freaking God! (Looong!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 13, 2003, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128 "2003-07-13T07:55:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 57
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1121 "2003-09-01T01:46:19Z")
Why, hello, **Jaade** ,How nice of you to join us- it is a little too late to participate in **mipiace**'s birthday spanking but we would love for you to join us in the legendary **Davebear** hot tub. We can play count the freckles on **mipiace**. May I take your clothing? Ummm… what is that perfume? And how about a drink? **Simple Dreamer** , **Maureen** , and **tanookie** were over earlier for dinner; you will love them. They are wonderful girls with a lively sense of humor and so sweet; but usually leave early because they have families and such. Our **Wyatt** is a very attentive and enthusiastic bartender, and such a cuddle puppy. Make sure and give him a little kiss when he delivers your drink, or better still, a peek up your skirt. I see you have already met **Robot Arm** --he does have a marvelous spork, doesn’t he? **KP** , **Optihut** , and **peritrochoid** , usually join us a little later, and they are kind of shy, but now that the female to male ratio has evened up a bit I suspect we can lure them into the hot tub with a little siren song. Oh boys… Oh, **Davebear** , come join us. **mipiace**'s freckles aren’t going to count themselves… ---
**Author:** ![tanookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/48db29/32.png) [@tanookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanookie)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1122 "2003-09-01T01:58:11Z")
Ya know, **Psalex** , the marvelous spork comment is priceless and full of innuendo 🙂 I think I will have to tell hubby he has a marvelous spork at just the right moment! He gives up on these threads after about 3 pages so I’m sure to get some odd reaction as he just won’t get the joke. I wonder what the infamous **Davebear** did this weekend and if he got dessert? I thought of him as we drove through Boston this afternoon. (I thought of all the BostonDopers actually as I peoplewatched) What kind of puppy is **Wyatt** anyways? Is he some kind of mutt or can we discern a breed here? Oh and do you people sleep? I understand about time zones and all that but the stuff that creeps up overnight always seems to be half posting and half hallucination 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1123 "2003-09-01T03:35:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > **No bouncy? Ok, I’ll hold back for now, but I can’t promise that I won’t do it again, I’m rather known for the bouncy.** Well, as long as you don’t mind playing Follow The Bouncing (Eye)Ball…we wouldn’t want you to feel repressed, around here. > [@](#): > > **And Davebear, it wouldn’t be a proper initiation without you…** I’d be honored. Am I pouring or slurping? > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by MeanOldLady_ > \*\*…nice to see you noticed I was missing. Didn’t think anyone would… \*\* Well, I noticed. There’s been a definite drop in the level of bitterness, around here, without your input. 😉 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*Oh,Davebear , come join us. mipiace 's freckles aren’t going to count themselves… \*\* Be right there. I just need to grab my diving mask and snorkel. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tanookie \* > \*\*I wonder what the infamous Davebear did this weekend and if he got dessert? I thought of him as we drove through Boston this afternoon. \*\* Well, I hate to disappoint the fans, but no, no dessert this weekend. The only dessert dish on the current menu was off to Maine with her kids. Sherri now knows about Harmony, so she’s off the menu. I did some housework, some shopping, and took some photos with the new digital camera I just bought. It’s pretty cool. ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1124 "2003-09-01T04:19:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Davebear \* > \*\* Well, I hate to disappoint the fans, but no, no dessert this weekend. \*\* _Nothing?_ I escape the continuing family melodrama only to find out you did NOTHING this weekend? How disappointing. With all the pheromones so rampant 'round here, I would have thought you’d get at least one invitation… Sorry you had such a boring weekend. ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1125 "2003-09-01T14:21:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > **KP ,Optihut, and peritrochoid , usually join us a little later, and they are kind of shy, but now that the female to male ratio has evened up a bit I suspect we can lure them into the hot tub with a little siren song. Oh boys…** Dammit! Missed the party … ☹ With **Psalex** , **mipiace** , **Jaade** , **Maureen** , **tanookie** , **Simple Dreamer** , **MeanOldLady** , and **White Ink** dropping by on regular intervals to torture and tease us boys, I’d say the Davebear Babes (is that like Barker’s Beauties?) have outnumbered us by now. That’s damn near **always** a good thing! 😃 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Optihut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/edb3f5/32.png) [@Optihut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Optihut)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1126 "2003-09-01T16:16:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mipiace \* > **Where do I begin? to even contribute to this? …I was gone for a day and what a mess I walk into…** Oh, I hear you! But at least I only had to read just one additional page, I anticipated at least 3 😉 > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by mipiace \* > Optihut:_\* > Cool - so where do you live now? The cupid guy kind of sounds like that other California gubnatorial candidate but less Conan-like and more sexy…except the guy is a total goombah (that is a Italian slang for he has no fucking sense) but hey I just like listening to him…so anyway…what’s your phone number…[she purrs]\*\* Well, as I said, I am still living in Germany. Aachen during the week and Düsseldorf on the weekends. Well, actually I am living in Düsseldorf, but I am in Aachen during the week in order to study. As for the joking comment about my phone number: Thanks for the nice sentiment, it´s very much appreciated. On a more serious note, I heard that it´s quite expensive to call abroad from the USA (I still remember calling just a different state from a payphone in NYC in 1998… The sheer horror!), whereas the phone companies are having a price war around here since 2001 or so. Currently calling the USA is at 2 cents / minute or something, even cheaper than a local call. So, if anything, I´d be the one calling people 😉 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mipiace \* > \*\*As far as the muffin goes…the verdict is still out…there is no huge bump and grind going on in either of our bedrooms unless he is doing it with some other conquest and if he does that…there will be no more Mipiace in between his sheets…we’ll see what happens. We took a few steps back to get to know each other again b/c I wasn’t sure I did know him anymore. \*\* Sounds sensible. Good luck on working that out. I for one thought that moving to where you live is something I could have done, so I am giving him two thumbs up for that, heh. **Jaade** , nice summary / commentary on **Wyatt`s** summary. Although you could have added numbers to **Wyatt´s** post, it would have made cross-referencing (for example #14) that much easier 😉 As for “that little cutie in the picture”: Argh! That´s the second vote on me being “cute” here - I guess I need some piercings and a tattoo, “cute” just doesn´t sound right ☹ > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by MeanOldLady_ > **Whoa, I’m famous? Cool. And Davey, nice to see you noticed I was missing. Didn’t think anyone would.** Are you kidding? With all those milk cartons with your picture on it, it was hard not to notice 😉 Besides, if **Dave** himself doesn´t notice when the Davebear Babes are missing, I´d be seriously disappointed. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Psalex_ > \*\*usually join us a little later, and they are kind of shy, \*\* Today the woman I am particularly interested in at the moment told me in an e-mail that she cannot make it to my party on friday. I just wrote her back that this is a pity and that maybe it would work out next time. Since I would hate waiting that long, I suggested to go out for a cup of coffee or meet for lunch or something. So far I haven´t received an answer on that, but yeah, “shy” is another adjective I need to get rid of. It´s right there, next to “cute” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1127 "2003-09-01T16:23:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Optihut \* > \*\* “shy” is another adjective I need to get rid of. It´s right there, next to “cute” 😉 \*\* Ah, but in my experience being called “cute” isn’t all that bad. It’s the “gee, you look/seem like a nice guy” that you have to worry about. 😉 I’ve been told (yes, by women) that “shy” is sexy if it’s balanced with confidence. It makes us mysterious. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1128 "2003-09-01T20:26:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Maureen \* > \*\*_Nothing?_ I escape the continuing family melodrama only to find out you did NOTHING this weekend? How disappointing. With all the pheromones so rampant 'round here, I would have thought you’d get at least one invitation… Sorry you had such a boring weekend. \*\* Oh, well, invitations are another story. I got a fabulous invitation, but couldn’t accept, due to logistical reasons. dammit! But, I don’t count those as dessert, and I don’t discuss them, here. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Optihut \* > \*\*As for the joking comment about my phone number… \*\* What makes you think she was kidding? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Optihut \* > \*\*As for “that little cutie in the picture”: Argh! That´s the second vote on me being “cute” here - I guess I need some piercings and a tattoo, “cute” just doesn´t sound right ☹ \*\* Dude! Take what you can get! Cute is good! Cute is waaay better than “amusing” or “interesting”. Cute will get you cuddled, if you play it right; that’s more than “interesting” will ever get you. And, cuddling has _soooo_ much potential. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Optihut \* > \*\*Besides, if Dave himself doesn´t notice when the Davebear Babes are missing, I´d be seriously disappointed. \*\* Oh, I notice. I don’t comment on it, because they have their own stuff to do, but I notice. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Optihut \* > \*\*I just wrote her back that this is a pity and that maybe it would work out next time. Since I would hate waiting that long, I suggested to go out for a cup of coffee or meet for lunch or something. \*\* We’ll all keep our fingers crossed for you to have better luck than I did. Oh, and I agree with **Rocky** , shy isn’t necessarily a bad thing, from what I’ve been told. ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1129 "2003-09-01T20:48:13Z")
[yeah, that same cartoon character joke] ummmmmm … Red Heads … ummmmmmm … [/ running joke into ground] > [@](#): > > _originally posted by Jaade_ > 14. Is that an offer? If so, I accept. We Now have another NEW **D.Bear** term!!! a #14!!??!?! Yes please! runs around in happy little puppy circles … mebby THIS babe could be the princess who will award the magic kisses!!! Mebby she din read the bits-licking parts !!!_pant pant_ searching pockets for breath spray _DoH!_ Doggies don’t HAVE Pockets !!! Whaaaaaaaaaaa! OH, and **Jaade** , your prize for being the first to pass the thread-exam?? … YOU, darlin’, get a #14!!! And … I’m the first volunteer to … uh … make the award … now, if you could just come down here and give the cute lil puppy a little magic kiss …???.. > [@](#): > > - originally posted by DaveBear\* Well, you’ve certainly had some effect on the male members, here. If you wanna call it a corruption, it’s okay with me. > > ## quote: > > ## Come over to me, Mipiace; my turn. Happy Birthday, Sugar. Now bend over… > > Ohhhh, my! I’m getting a corruption, again. There ARE some bad parts to bein’ a puppy, but when there’s noone around to offer your own personal “Tootsie Roll Pop” Birthday treatment … It’s handy to be able to … uh … be … self sufficient! > [@](#): > > ## _originally posted by Mipiace_ Jaade quote: > > ## Do I get to be the licker or the lickee? > > Around here it generally works out to be both unless you get turned into a dog or something and then you get banished to only taking flea baths for entertainment. It’s a species-ist degrading … why this is Pit worth … hum? What was that noise? Woof?! Oh, Look, somebody spilled something on this chair!!! … > [@](#): > > _originally posted by KP_ > Hmmm… am I the only one who thinks a girl makes better BTUs (read: “hotter”) when they’re licky Nope, you are Definitely NOT alone on that one! “Come on over here, **DaveBear Babe** let me help raise your BTU’s!” > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Psalex_ > Come over to me, Mipiace; my turn. Happy Birthday, Sugar. Now bend over… Talk about rasing MY BTU’s !!! _Whew!_ _pant pant_ _Woof!_ … I believe I’m having a corruption! > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by DaveBear_ > Is there anything more moving than the sight of a girl and her spork, standing proudly before an audience, the lights gleaming off her porcelain white teeth and the shiny plastic spork? It’s just heartwrenching. _Bowing at the feet of his Sensei_ Ah, **D.Bear** Your ability to capture such heartwarming scenes, the joy, the tears, the pathos … and bring it forward in richly descriptive poetic words … **D.Bear** , the reasons for your ardent following are So apparent!!! > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Tanookie_ > What kind of puppy is Wyatt anyways? Is he some kind of mutt or can we discern a breed here? Don’t think I’ve ever zactly been known for my good breeding … good ‘breeding skills’ … a "talented #14[sup]er[/sup] as it were … but … well … ---
**Author:** ![KP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a9adbd/32.png) [@KP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2003, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1130 "2003-09-01T22:19:49Z")
_ **Shy?** _ _ME?_ - I don’t know that I’ve ever been accused of _that_ before. I’ve just been trying to find my ‘voice’ (board persona) after a long absence from the board. My old nick was creeping me out too I finally made a name change request for a clean break (My nicks/sites were once sniffed out of a work computer back when I was active, and snippets of stuff I posted on websites were spread, out of context, in a behind-my-back smear campaign. Imagine a junior high stolen-lovenote dramafest with paunchy, balding whitecoats in the teen roles, a Mrs. Grundy think-alike on stalking & surveillance [which was somehow cuter when we did it on our Schwinns], and a near lapse into a Pam Smart subplot, which fortunately didn’t involve me) I was a bit hesitant to post much until it went through Eventually, the lack of response led me to conclude I’d been snubbed, so I decided “whatthehell”. (I later learned that Lynn was still in the hospital when I made the requests) Besides, I kinda burned out on the whole group thing in my misspent youth (I think I expressed my opinions on the overrated _menage a trois_ earlier in this thread, so you can imagine how I feel about _menage a vingt_. I much prefer to concentrate on one -er, ‘thing’ wouldn’t be the right word- at a time But I guess I can see how I might have come off as a bit standoffish. What’s a (non-Dave) guy got to do to recruit around here? Set up a stand? > [@](#): > > _Grumbling, I haul my old charity kissing booth out of the garage and -er- erect it. (Hey, a worthy cause is a worthy cause, whatever the exact details!) Now what shall I peddle? Tootsie rolls seem to be going over well, but I’m not going to step on any toes. Hmm…_ > > “KP says “Love my Good & Plenty!” > KP says “Really rings your bell!” > KP says “Love my Good & Plenty!” > Don’t know another candy that can love so well!” Maybe I should get some roller-blading carhops, in tight shorts and short skirts. “Hey Hector! Two number 14s, a puppy on a blanket, an egg cream (sheesh, talk about your obscene drink names. I don’t know if I’d accept one of those from a ‘soda jerk’) and a sarsparilla.” Tacky, yes -immensely!- but it ought to take the edge off the whole “shy” thing. > [@](#): > > My, my you are a cunning linguist aren’t you? Have you mastered all of the romance languages? C’mon, **mipiace** , you sashay into the joint (and, hoo boy, do you sashay!) with a nick that translates to “Me likey!” and you think no one will notice? I know your type. When they said _“Vedi Napoli, e poi mori”_ [1] you thought they meant _la morte piccolo_. [2] * * * [1] Famous Italian saying:“Go to Naples, and then die” (i.e. 'See Naples before you die). Incidentally, this is the basis for Joey Tribbiani’s famous Sicillian curse on _Friends_: “Va fa Napoli” means “Go to Naples” (i.e. drop dead) [2] “The little death” about which the less said, the better - if only because words fall short ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1131 "2003-09-02T00:23:26Z")
**Wyatt** , come here. After an exhausting week-end with my new 120 pound puppy, I have been exposed to more grateful slobber, drool, pre-chewed dog food, and slime than a tennis ball at Westminster. I feel more than qualified and immunized to handle a little doggie kiss, and a prince ye shall be. Actually, I had better go and brush my teeth first. I cannot promise that you won’t revert to doggie form when the call comes to tend bar, nor can I promise that leg humping and inappropriate licking will be unwelcome. We **Davebear Babes** are known to get a little freaky when drinking. Smoooooch…… **KP** is not shy? But not into the group thing? Understood. So… do you like redheads, former ballerinas, or bouncy girls? We seem to have quite a variety of fiery chicas here- but you have to like mischievous. We all seem to be a little…cheeky. But perhaps there is more to the **Davebear Babes** babes than meets the eye… all **Davebear Babes** including you married and family types, sound off. We know alllll about the OP, time for some girl confessions: Favorite food and drink: Music most likely to accompany your commute to work: Favorite art (be specific) poetry, painting, photography, music, architecture, or fill in the blank: Pet of choice: Underwear: matched or jauntily mismatched? If any **Davebear Babe** feels comfortable adding a blurb to describe their off-board personality, please feel free. **Optihut** , instead of coffee or pseudo-date, try to take girl of choice along on an errand-running trip- to the bookstore, shoe store, pet shop, automobile shopping, etc. You two can grab a lunch while out, and the conversation in the car side-by side is much easier than the forced intimacy of a restaurant table. peritrochoid, cute, shy, nice guy. Honey, you have got the Wankel of my dreams. If any girl doubts your studliness, just whip out the Wankel. The very idea just gets me torqued… **Davebear**? Been playin’ with that new camera? Is it waterproof? 😉 Can we play with it? Pretty please? With a cherry on top? ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1132 "2003-09-02T02:42:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > **peritrochoid, cute, shy, nice guy. Honey, you have got the Wankel of my dreams. If any girl doubts your studliness, just whip out the Wankel. The very idea just gets me torqued…** 😃 **LOL**! 😃 Why, thank you, **Psalex**! :: spoken in the studly masculinity that comes with having the biggest Wankel around :: Oh, it seems you forgot to provide your own answers to the _ **Davebear Babes** _ confessions. Care to elaborate? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![hoboonmoto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hoboonmoto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hoboonmoto)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1133 "2003-09-02T03:06:40Z")
Well written. Jeeze. This has gotta be a net record for the most replies to a post by a happy/somewhat pissed guy. I can only aspire to such greatness. Honestly. I post in a similar state of mind, often. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1134 "2003-09-02T03:16:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wyatt \* > **_Bowing at the feet of his Sensei_ Ah, D.Bear Your ability to capture such heartwarming scenes, the joy, the tears, the pathos … and bring it forward in richly descriptive poetic words … D.Bear, the reasons for your ardent following are So apparent!!!** Welcome back from your arduous ordeal, Grasshopper. And, it’s nice to see you back in human form. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KP to mipiace \* > **When they said “Vedi Napoli, e poi mori” [1] you thought they meant la morte piccolo. [2]** Boy, have you got _her_ number! And, apparently that number is 2. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*Wyatt, come here. After an exhausting week-end with my new 120 pound puppy, I have been exposed to more grateful slobber, drool, pre-chewed dog food, and slime than a tennis ball at Westminster. I feel more than qualified and immunized to handle a little doggie kiss, and a prince ye shall be. Actually, I had better go and brush my teeth first. \*\* How does she make this sound so appealing? Have I been hanging out in my own threads too long? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > **Davebear? Been playin’ with that new camera? Is it waterproof? 😉 Can we play with it? Pretty please? With a cherry on top?** I have! It’s a lot of fun. Not waterproof, but the do make waterproof cases that should work just fine. And, honey, you can play with anything I’ve got. Oh, and the cherry? Can’t I suck it out of your belly button, again? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hoboonmoto \* > \*\*Well written. > > Jeeze. This has gotta be a net record for the most replies to a post by a happy/somewhat pissed guy. I can only aspire to such greatness. Honestly. I post in a similar state of mind, often. \*\* Thanks! Pull up a barstool. The bartender’s back. Oh, and a quick update; I invited Sherri over for a cook-out dinner, because she’s had a tough couple of weeks, and I was lonely, and a cook-out for one person just isn’t worth the effort. And, dammit, I haven’t had a cook-out all summer, and here it is, Labor Day. So I had one, despite the rain. So, we had burgers for dinner, and then we had Dessert. Yep. We had some of the cake she brought, for dessert. And, watched some of the US Open. And, then she went home. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1135 "2003-09-02T03:28:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MeanOldLady \* > Whoa, I’m famous? Cool. And **Davey** , nice to see you noticed I was missing. Didn’t think anyone would. Afterall, I just pop into a thread, insert a comment which _I_ think is wildly hilarious (if no one else), then leave. And on that note, it’s time for the crowning… > > ~::Enters in long flowing gown, ala Miss America pageants, and crowns the newest Davebear Babe::~ > > Wear it well, sugah. ~kisses both of **MeanOldLady’s** cheeks~ Thank you darlin’, I will wear it with pride. > [@](#): > > **Psalex** : > > Why, hello, Jaade ,How nice of you to join us- it is a little too late to participate in mipiace 's birthday spanking but we would love for you to join us in the legendary Davebear hot tub. We can play count the freckles on mipiace. May I take your clothing? Ummm… what is that perfume? And how about a drink? ~smiles~ The perfume is Beautiful, and I’d love a drink, doll. Any Midori around here? ~hands over her blouse and pants to **Psalex** before hopping into the hottub~ > [@](#): > > **Davebear** : > > Well, as long as you don’t mind playing Follow The Bouncing (Eye)Ball…we wouldn’t want you to feel repressed, around here. Oh, thanks **Dave**! > [@](#): > > **Davebear** : > > I’d be honored. Am I pouring or slurping? Theadstarter’s choice. (But why limit yourself? You could have both, you know) > [@](#): > > **Rocky** : > With Psalex, mipiace, Jaade, Maureen, tanookie, Simple Dreamer, MeanOldLady, and White Ink dropping by on regular intervals to torture and tease us boys, I’d say the Davebear Babes (is that like Barker’s Beauties?) have outnumbered us by now. That’s damn near always a good thing! ~winks~ I _think_ I speak for all the ladies when I say we’re happy to oblige. > [@](#): > > **Optihut** : > Jaade, nice summary / commentary on Wyatt`s summary. Although you could have added numbers to Wyatt´s post, it would have made cross-referencing (for example #14) that much easier Thanks doll! I thought about it actually, but I tried to mostly include references or state my answer with the question inside of it to make up for that. > [@](#): > > As for “that little cutie in the picture”: Argh! That´s the second vote on me being “cute” here - I guess I need some piercings and a tattoo, “cute” just doesn´t sound right Trust me darlin’, cutie is _not_ a bad term when I use it. It’s synonymous with hottie. > [@](#): > > **Wyatt** : > > We Now have another NEW D.Bear term!!! > a #14!!??!?! Yes please! > > runs around in happy little puppy circles … mebby THIS babe could be the princess who will award the magic kisses!!! Mebby she din read the bits-licking parts !!!_pant pant_ searching pockets for breath spray _DoH!_ Doggies don’t HAVE Pockets !!! Whaaaaaaaaaaa! > > OH, and Jaade, your prize for being the first to pass the thread-exam?? … YOU, darlin’, get a #14!!! And … I’m the first volunteer to … uh … make the award … now, if you could just come down here and give the cute lil puppy a little magic kiss …???.. ~considers~ Well, I don’t know…I’m not really a dog lover…but I see that **Psalex** has offered to do the honors for you. Let’s get together so you can give me my prize after that. ~grins~ > [@](#): > > **Psalex** : > > But perhaps there is more to the Davebear Babes babes than meets the eye… all Davebear Babes including you married and family types, sound off. We know alllll about the OP, time for some girl confessions: > > 1. Favorite food and drink: > > 2. Music most likely to accompany your commute to work: > > 3. Favorite art (be specific) poetry, painting, photography, music, architecture, or fill in the blank: > > 4. Pet of choice: > > 5. Underwear: matched or jauntily mismatched? > > 6. If any Davebear Babe feels comfortable adding a blurb to describe their off-board personality, please feel free. I’ll go first! (Though I started answering this thread an hour ago and got distracted, so my answers may not _be_ first) 1. Drinks–Alcoholic: Midori Sour or Grape Nehi Soda: Cherry Coke Other: Sweet Iced Tea or Mocha Food–Fruit: Peaches Meal: Chicken Parmigiana, Steak or burgers 2. Pop or country, I listen to a _lot_ of different music 3. Favorite poetry: Robert Frost “The Road Less Traveled” Favorite music: Country, overall Favorite movies: Wizard of Oz, Gone With the Wind, Chicago, Moulin Rouge, Shag, and others… Favorite architecture: Tudor, Victorian, and Antebellum styles 4. Cats or fish 5. Umm…invisible? Matched if I wear any, to everything I am wearing ~L~ 6. My off-board personality is apparently similar to my onboard personality. My friends describe me as witty, flirty, intelligent and bold. On preview: Sorry **Dave** , that you only got dessert and not a #14. You are almost getting as little action as I am these days! ~J ---
**Author:** ![KP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a9adbd/32.png) [@KP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1136 "2003-09-02T03:48:13Z")
Hurry Hurry, step right up, for the greatest show on Earth, The wildest ride in the SMDB, where candy is dandy but lick’er is quicker Freaks, Forks, sporks, torque, and the occassional Bork See DaveBear and KP of Men Without Hair sing their hit songs “Pop goes the Girl” and “We can dance if you want to”! Hey, Dave, as a fellow shavee, shouldn’t you be DaveBare? And wouldn’t Swedish Mafia make a great warm-up band? Oh wait. The warm up band plays for the _audience_, doesn’t it? What do _they_ need warming up for? Who’s gonna warm _us_ up, then? See Wyatt the pup-boy, the hot dog, the foot-long wiener! Be exposed to more slobber than a tennis ball at Westchester! Seh Optihut, mit dem (hubschem) Lachen und Sprachen from Aachen (Yeah, like I’d even _try_ to rhyme Duesseldorf) _**to the tune of “Side Show” [([http://haapy:newyear@djspinnercee.servemp3.com:20415/mp3.1/Blue%20Magic%20-%20Sideshow.mp3](http://haapy:newyear@djspinnercee.servemp3.com:20415/mp3.1/Blue%20Magic%20-%20Sideshow.mp3))] by Blue Magic**_ BARKER: “Hurry, hurry, step right up See the hottest show in town for over twenty pages” \* Step right up, hurry hurry, before the thread’s too long, my friends Strip your shorts, Try the hot tub, I know you will belong It’ll only cost your sanity to see What flirting does to folks like you and me See the Bear with the broken heart, you’ll see that he is sad, Got treated bad (So badly, so bad) See the gal who passed up the finest love she could’ve had But DaveBear’s Babes, they are the perfect remedy No doubt about it, satisfaction’s guaranteed So let the sideshow begin Hurry, hurry, step right on in Can’t afford to pass it by Guaranteed to make you sigh Let the sideshow begin Hurry, hurry, step right on in Work yourself into a state No dessert if you are late See the students study hard under Dave-sensei, his mystic ways (his mystic ways) See your toes- Tanookie can’t 'cause her bellies in the way We’ve better breasts here than Purdue’s own farm And breast-grav goggles to protect your eyes from harm Oh let the eyeflicks begin! Hurry, hurry, Wild feasel sin! A tummy’s quite a sexy thing Wyatt’s cool and everything Uh Oh, The DaveBear’s gone out (Hurry, hurry, need details NOW) Don’t worry whether it is wise Mustn’t overanalyze! Let the aardvarks patrol (They play a role) Hurry, hurry, typo control Try the ‘Spit or swallow’ thread It’ll go straight to your [-um-] head. Oh yes, the sideshow’s begun Hurry, hurry, you’ll miss the fun Give our body shots a try I guarantee that we’re not shy Yes, the sideshow’s not done … It’s just begun\* ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1137 "2003-09-02T03:56:59Z")
:: Standing Ovation :: **Bravo**! **Splendid**! **ASTOUNDING**! Very slick, **KP** , _very_ slick! 🆒 Had some free time today, eh? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1138 "2003-09-02T03:57:33Z")
I will eat anything and everything but meat; including what is on your plate if you aren’t guarding it very carefully. Fresh figs are my absolute favorite food, although I have to beg the local grocer to order them for me here. Oh, and I love to suck the pimentos out of olives. Exception to the meat rule: I will try anything on a dare. (Okay, I just re-read the above, and cannot edit or rephrase because all is true. Please don’t Freud me) Ideally, a perfect margarita. Second: Killian’s. To work: Tool, Pearl Jam, Stones, Led Zeppelin, Soul Coughing, Sammy Hagar, Queens of the Stone Age, Foo Fighters, Chili Peppers; mostly alternative, aggressive, and loud. On the way home: NPR, old blues, Dave Matthews, Joan Osborne, chamber music. (R & B in the kitchen, I dance while I cook) pssst… Jaade- I love Johnny Cash and Lucinda Williams- get to see both live often because I live 12 miles from the Carter Fold) Movies: Current favorite is Beat the Devil on the BMW films website. The best 15 minutes of recorded material I have ever experienced. Big, stupid dogs. (Also have cats, fish, and ducks. Yes, ducks.) Architecture: Gehry. Minimalist./modern décor. Art/sculpture: Andy Goldsworthy. Matched, except on Mondays. I rebel on Mondays. Workweek appearance: buttoned down, uptight cool professional. Outside of work: exactly what you read here, though without the raunchy mouth. You won’t hear a curse word leave my lips, and I blush far too easily to flirt as openly as I do in **Davebear’s** house. . According to my friends a few drinks will turn the vixen loose; though I always deny that on Mondays. ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1139 "2003-09-02T04:07:21Z")
You get to see Johnny Cash live!?! :eek: Waaaay cool! ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1140 "2003-09-02T04:32:18Z")
> [@](#): > > **Phalex** : > > pssst… Jaade- I love Johnny Cash and Lucinda Williams- get to see both live often because I live 12 miles from the Carter Fold) Very cool doll!! ~sings the Ring of Fire loudly~ I once saw Kenny Rogers in person, here in Houston in a concert, if that counts. ~grins~ ~J [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=56) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=58)