# Oh, My Freaking God! (Looong!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 13, 2003, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128 "2003-07-13T07:55:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 72
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1421 "2003-09-09T20:22:18Z")
Bleah, I _hate_ AIS, or maybe I just really dislike the militaristic mindset of the guys who wrote the book on it. Alas, they were the only ones to address stretching the ilio-tibial band. [/random physiology rant] **Simple Dreamer** … I used to get horrifically tight shoulders esp right in that cranny that goes between the scapula and the spine. I found that there are a couple of variations on a really simple stretch that offer relief. Basically, you get a grip on a door handle or a vertical bar, hold your arm straight and bend your legs so that a significant amount of your weight is transferred to your back, arm and shoulder. Depending on the way that you grip the door knob or the bar or the stair case (rotate your hand around), it will stretch those different parts of your back near your shoulder blade. Hopefully that will help. Another trick that works well for backs, but may offer you shoulder relief as well is to take two dead tennis balls, place them on the floor 3- 3/12 inches apart and lay down on them so that each one is on either side of your spine. Starting either at your hips or the nape of your neck, slowly scoot along the ground, rolling the tennis balls along your back. I’d go an inch, wait a couple of minutes, go another inch, wait a couple of minutes. All told it took about 30 minutes, unless I fell asleep. Sounds and looks dorky, but the end result is fairly worth it. Again, thanks for the hugznluv folks. Muchly appreciated. ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1422 "2003-09-09T21:58:02Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by if6was9_ > > BTW, if salix means willow, what does the P stand for? The _P_ is psilent, psomeone else already chose _Salix_ as thier username here. Psilly boy. **White Ink** , I am pretty sure all of **Davebear** ’s girls are in thier 30’s; please send rant when ready. None of us will try to correct you, though you may get some sympathy nods and encouragement. ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1423 "2003-09-09T22:33:01Z")
**mipiace** , are you gonna take over teasing Rocky when **Psalex** leaves us? 😃 Please? Pretty please with sugar on top? ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1424 "2003-09-09T22:36:23Z")
pssst… Rocky- I can still hear you… ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1425 "2003-09-09T22:57:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*pssst… Rocky- I can still hear you… \*\* :smack: Doh! Uhh … I said that just to see if you were paying attention. Yeah. Honest Abe. I swear! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1426 "2003-09-09T23:01:48Z")
**mipiace** , **peritrochoid** wants to show you the Wankel. ---
**Author:** ![White\_Ink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@White\_Ink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Ink)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1427 "2003-09-09T23:15:07Z")
The Wankel? your jewish cousin? ;j ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2003, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1428 "2003-09-09T23:43:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*The _P_ is psilent, psomeone else already chose _Salix_ as thier username here. > > Psilly boy. > > **White Ink** , I am pretty sure all of **Davebear** ’s girls are in thier 30’s; please send rant when ready. None of us will try to correct you, though you may get some sympathy nods and encouragement. \*\* I’m 27… > [@](#): > > **Psalex** > > Move over, Jaade, I am getting back in the tub with you and the bouys. ~moves over and pulls **Psalex** into the tub~ > [@](#): > > **Wyatt** > > Oh … Daaaarlin’ > _sits back to look admiringly out toward the balcony, enjoying the “back lit” look through your evening wear …_ ~grins~ Didn’t you read Psalex’s description, darlin’? When I’m on the balcony…I’m not wearing evening wear. ~winks~ > [@](#): > > **Davebear** > > Come on in back, to my private screening room. I’ll play it for you. Did you want me to get out of the hottub? My fingers aren’t even wrinkled yet! > [@](#): > > Who said you weren’t? I actually have a list… > [@](#): > > Oh, I’m pretty sure you do. Mind if I take a closer look? Oh, yeah. There is some left, right there in that luscious little hollow at the base of your throat, just waiting for a warm, wet tongue to scoop it up and smear across a yearning palate. But, it may take several passes, using different techniques; a stiff pointed tongue to make sure every last drop of gooey goodness is teased out of the soft folds of your flesh; a soft, flat tongue swept across the skin to make sure no spot is left untouched; And, there’s that hard little bump that may require some moist lips to suck the last clinging drops off it. And, one can’t forget to follow the yummy trail of sweetness that inevitably flows downward when one is busy above, collecting and savoring each precious droplet. May I? But of course darlin’ > [@](#): > > I love talented women. If you can get that toe-touching-the-back-of-the-head act in shape, again, we’ll make a fortune selling tickets. I think it’s more the fear factor than anything…but I’ll let you know soon. ~winks~ > [@](#): > > **mipiace** > > Oh hell we all know it won’t, a zebra never changes it’s stripes and I am not that stupid but it feels good for now. I’m not quite as stoned on good lovin as I was yesterday but it had been a long time since I had dessert…forgive me of my weaknesses. > I have come to my senses today. ~hugs~ It’s alright sweetie, I’ve definitely been there! No forgiveness required. > [@](#): > > Maybe y ou just need a good woman White Ink. There are several here who can make it all better. May I volunteer my services? Hey…I’ll take you up on that offer if she doesn’t! ~winks~ > [@](#): > > **Psalex** > > Attention!!! Davebear Babes: line up in alphabetical cup order. ~stands proudly beside **mipiace** ~ 36C here too! With the ghetto booty…geez **mipiace** …I’m beginning to wonder if we are related… ~agrees with **Wyatt** ’s post to **White Ink** ~ You are still very young darlin’, even if your body tries to tell you different. You need a long period of self reflection, and then I would say that you need to find someone that you can be comfortable with, inside and out. But maybe there’s still more we don’t know. ~hugs~ I hope something we’ve said helps a bit. > [@](#): > > **Rocky** > > mipiace, are you gonna take over teasing Rocky when Psalex leaves us? psst…Psalex heard you, and you are in T-R-O-U-B-L-E. And what am I? Chopped liver?? ~J ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1429 "2003-09-10T00:13:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by White Ink \* > \*\*Bleah, I _hate_ AIS, or maybe I just really dislike the militaristic mindset of the guys who wrote the book on it. \*\* Are we talking the same stuff? … Aaron is the only guy who wrote the book(s) … and didn’t strike me as militaristic … I did note that the “first book” on it is on “close out” sale … so maybe that was the militaristic seeming one! Aaron is cool as all get out! ---
**Author:** ![tanookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/48db29/32.png) [@tanookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanookie)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1430 "2003-09-10T00:38:33Z")
I’ll be 31 in December and I hope this isn’t old already! I’m not ready to be all set in my ways and stuff! But bitch away… I’m willing to be a shoulder to rant on! ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1431 "2003-09-10T01:08:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > \*\*And what am I? Chopped liver?? > \*\* But of course not! If you are, you’ve done a great job of covering up the smell. 😉 No, dear **Jaade** , **Psalex** just has this knack, you see, for teasing and teasing, then _poof_ turning her attention elsewhere. I’ll be damned if I don’t find that challenge **very** alluring! 🙂 :: desperately trying to avoid _yo-yo eyes_ :: Y’know, **Jaade** , I’ve seen you around here, but I think we don’t know each other all that well. Mind if I join you in the hot tub? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![mipiace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb9ed0/32.png) [@mipiace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mipiace)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1432 "2003-09-10T01:17:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\ ***mipiace** , **peritrochoid** wants to show you the Wankel. \*\* I will gladly tease Rocky’s wankel any time…and will be honored to take over teasing duties when Psalex departs. I will discharge my duties daily with rigor and fervor…I am honored to be chosen as teaser of the Rock! [slurp…birthday’s a cummin’ babe - I haven’t forgotten…] 😃 ---
**Author:** ![mipiace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb9ed0/32.png) [@mipiace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mipiace)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1433 "2003-09-10T01:22:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > \*\*I’m 27… > > Hey…I’ll take you up on that offer if she doesn’t! ~winks~ > > ~stands proudly beside **mipiace** ~ 36C here too! With the ghetto booty…geez **mipiace** …I’m beginning to wonder if we are related… > > psst…Psalex heard you, and you are in T-R-O-U-B-L-E. > > And what am I? Chopped liver?? > ~J \*\* Well sweetie, we may have to just tag team that baby - besides, given all ouor similarities, we make a nice set of bookends dontcha think? {Ohhhh man is Houstin/Austin/San Antonio never going to be the same when we hit town!!} I have this weird fantasy (and fear) of introducing you to Studmuffin. If he wasn’t such a bastard I would. Guess he won’t know what he’s missing. ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1434 "2003-09-10T01:29:56Z")
Hey, \*\* peritrochoid \*\* how long does it take your Wankel to travel 75 miles? ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1435 "2003-09-10T01:35:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*Hey, \*\* peritrochoid \*\* how long does it take your Wankel to travel 75 miles? \*\* Let’s put it this way … your glasses at Lenscrafters would almost be done. :: fingers crossed, hoping that was the right answer :: ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1436 "2003-09-10T01:43:36Z")
\*meek and lowly grasshopper just lets his head spin, trying to keep track of all the going’s on … chanting his mantra … always close your codings — preview is my friend — always close your codings — preview is my friend — … ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1437 "2003-09-10T01:49:10Z")
Would you rather get glasses or go dancing? ---
**Author:** ![peritrochoid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@peritrochoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peritrochoid)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1438 "2003-09-10T01:58:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Psalex \* > \*\*Would you rather get glasses or go dancing? \*\* Well, considering I already have glasses, I don’t need another pair … 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Psalex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/439d5e/32.png) [@Psalex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psalex)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1439 "2003-09-10T02:13:25Z")
First **Davebear** catches my eye, but his dessert was on another menu. Then **Wyatt** came along, only to get bathed by every **Davebear Babe** at the party. **if6was9** compliments my assets; but the moment I leave the room, he sees double assets and forgets all about me. \*\* peritrochoid \*\*has the Wankel I so desire, then accuses me of fickle behavior. So close…yet so far. **mipiace** and **Jaade** , you gorgeous mermaids, are the only true loves I have at **Davebear’s** place. I wasted my time flirting with all these men when there were assets to follow, hair to brush, freckles to count, tummies to rub, and moonlit boobage floating in the hot tub. I hearby renounce my membership in the Tease the Boys club. I want to play on the girls’ team. Did I mention that I love to paint toe nails? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128/1440 "2003-09-10T02:38:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by peritrochoid \* > \*\*But of course not! If you are, you’ve done a great job of covering up the smell. 😉 > > No, dear **Jaade** , **Psalex** just has this knack, you see, for teasing and teasing, then _poof_ turning her attention elsewhere. I’ll be damned if I don’t find that challenge **very** alluring! 🙂 > > :: desperately trying to avoid _yo-yo eyes_ :: > Y’know, **Jaade** , I’ve seen you around here, but I think we don’t know each other all that well. Mind if I join you in the hot tub? 😉 \*\* Well darlin’, everyone is always welcome in the hottub, but I wouldn’t want you to be accused of being fickle. 😉 We know, all the women here are incredibly skilled at getting and keeping attention, must be getting a bit tough for some of you boys. > [@](#): > > **mipiace** > > Well sweetie, we may have to just tag team that baby - besides, given all ouor similarities, we make a nice set of bookends dontcha think? > > {Ohhhh man is Houstin/Austin/San Antonio never going to be the same when we hit town!!} I have this weird fantasy (and fear) of introducing you to Studmuffin. If he wasn’t such a bastard I would. Guess he won’t know what he’s missing. I think we make a set of bea-u-ti-ful bookends…~preens~ {~grins~ I see much partying in our future!} Aww, poor guy, to be denied…it would truly be his just desserts, no? > [@](#): > > **Psalex** > > First Davebear catches my eye, but his dessert was on another menu. Then Wyatt came along, only to get bathed by every Davebear Babe at the party. if6was9 compliments my assets; but the moment I leave the room, he sees double assets and forgets all about me. peritrochoid has the Wankel I so desire, then accuses me of fickle behavior. So close…yet so far. > > mipiace and Jaade, you gorgeous mermaids, are the only true loves I have at Davebear’s place. I wasted my time flirting with all these men when there were assets to follow, hair to brush, freckles to count, tummies to rub, and moonlit boobage floating in the hot tub. > > I hearby renounce my membership in the Tease the Boys club. I want to play on the girls’ team. > > Did I mention that I love to paint toe nails? **Psalex** , darlin’, it wouldn’t be the same without you. Get in the tub! I have freckles that need counting, and **mipiace** needs her tummy rubbed. Ohh, and I love to have my toenails painted…can you make the little flowers?? ~J ~J [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=71) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-my-freaking-god-looong/188128.md?page=73)