# Oh Taco Bell... why can't I quit you? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 23, 2009, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602 "2009-01-23T06:57:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/41 "2009-01-24T04:25:01Z")
Round these parts, everybody who works at Taco Bell is Mexican, as are some of the customers. Neither used to be true, and the food was worse. Now it’s just awful, but with that ineffable “something” that keeps me coming back, though I have many REAL Mexican restaurants to choose from. I think its cocaine. However, in my experience I find more Mexicans, buying or selling, at the Chinese buffets than at either. One gave up and was playing Norteño rather than bad Chinese pop (and there is little worse than bad Chinese pop). You haven’t had Mongolian grill if it wasn’t made by a guy named Pedro while engulfed in a polka in another language. There is a Latin flourish in the handling of the giant chopsticks that is not matched by a guy from Shanghai. ETA: The sauces in the little packets are surprisingly useful. My wife adds them, along with peanut butter, to her African-style Swiss chard. Honest to God, it works. She claims to have had guys from Nigeria propose to her after eating her greens (shut up–it isn’t even CLOSE to a double entendre). “Just like mama made,” and all that. ---
**Author:** ![Invisible\_Chimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f05b48/32.png) [@Invisible\_Chimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Invisible_Chimp)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/42 "2009-01-24T07:00:27Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > Find yourself a White Castle. > > Ingest their griddled, onion infused slivers of greasy gristle served between steamed white bread buns with ketchup and a pickle chip. Maybe with jalapeno cheese if you’re the daring kind. Add a side of deep fried onion rings just to add to the empty, fatty calorie count. > > Realize that, as far as inexplicable abuse of your digestive system and taste buds go, you have found a new dominatrix. The Bell will be forgotten. > [@devilsknew](#): > > I think the summary and signature dishes for Taco Bell are the Enchirito and the Mexican Pizza. These are about the most harmonious combinations of their limited pantry, the height of Taco Bell technology and taste. These “grilld” and “tostd” abominations that they try to pass off nowadays are assimilated and patched technologies. They just aren’t as good. They aren’t changing their menu, just changing a configuration. Except now, in the case of the Volcano Taco they are actually changing taste… that’s good ol’ YUM! doctrine for ya. As the volcano tacos are no longer available, maybe they have attained McRib status- Seasonal cash injection. There are no White Castles restaurants for most of the country(although you can get them at many groceries around, which I just did recently), but there are Taco Hells across the land. The Enchirito is my favorite item on the Hell’s menu and has been since I was a kid. They took it off for a while, but then brought it back. Last time I went to my local Hell, there was no Enchirito on their menu and if they took it away again I will not be happy. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/43 "2009-01-24T07:14:01Z")
Mmmm. Two Burrito Supremes, about 6 packs of salsa, and I’m in heaven. ---
**Author:** ![BrassyPhrase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea666f/32.png) [@BrassyPhrase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrassyPhrase)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/44 "2009-01-24T07:28:04Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > 3 regular tacos and 2 spicy bean burritos for me, please. And a handful of “hot” sauce packets, thank you very much. > > Back in college, our apartment shared a fence with Taco Bell. There was a hole in the fence that everyone used for a short cut. My roommate would cruise over at closing time, hoping to scavenge anything they were going to toss out. He rarely came back empty-handed. That stuff may have been sitting under a heat lamp for awhile, but it was a free midnight snack to him. “hot sauce?!” Not fire sauce? I have the horrid taco bell cravings too. It doesn’t help that there is ONE in the PARKING LOT of the place I work. I really try to not eat fast food, but oh..oh oh sometimes it does call to me. Sadly, I am in Texas. I know about \ five decent texmex places five minutes from where I work and two really REALLY good ones near where I live. (A half hour away.) And I have succumbed. I am not proud of it. ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/45 "2009-01-24T07:36:05Z")
What no love for the Grilled Stuffed Burrito? Those things, soft taco supremes with ground beef and gorditas and chalupas in chicken and steak are all “good.” ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/46 "2009-01-26T22:23:44Z")
Nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/47 "2009-01-26T22:58:32Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I thought I was the only one that liked those! Do you remember when they were called Chilitoes? I most certainly do. They’re another one that fell off the menu for a while, but you could still order them, and now they’re back full time. I’m going to Taco Bell right now… ---
**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/48 "2009-01-26T23:13:07Z")
I am a health food fanatic but the Smell calls to me once in a while. My achilles heel is the “chicken” crunchwrap supreme. When I moved to CA I also became very fond of Del Taco’s fish tacos but the last time I ate them (which was a while back, admittedly) the fish were overnuked and it put me off my feed on Del Taco generally. Their sauce is better than the Smell’s sauce. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/49 "2009-01-26T23:24:04Z")
Taco Bell has owned my soul most of my life. I had a girlfriend in the late 70’s who worked at TB and I’m pretty sure half the reason I dated her was because she snuck me Bell Beefers. I can’t go more than six months without shoving three tacos and a burrito supreme in my face, all slathered in Fire Sauce. It’s like heroin. When I was a kid and my mom moved back to California and I was still in Wisconsin, the very first thing I demanded when I visited mom was a trip to Taco Barf, and wolf some tacos. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/50 "2009-01-26T23:44:57Z")
One of my most missed discontinued food items is the Big Beef Burrito. Just beef, cheese, onions and sauce. Goddamn, that thing was good. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2009, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/51 "2009-01-27T00:32:03Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > Find yourself a White Castle. > > Ingest their griddled, onion infused slivers of greasy gristle served between steamed white bread buns with ketchup and a pickle chip. Maybe with jalapeno cheese if you’re the daring kind. Add a side of deep fried onion rings just to add to the empty, fatty calorie count. > > Realize that, as far as inexplicable abuse of your digestive system and taste buds go, you have found a new dominatrix. The Bell will be forgotten. God, I wish we had them here! Eh, the Bell is like McDonald’s; not real, not good, but satisfying in their familiarity and comforting unwholesomeness. You get drawn in, but after the frenzy, those chemical belches remind you you should’ve abstained. ---
**Author:** ![MadPansy64](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@MadPansy64](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MadPansy64)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2009, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602/52 "2009-01-27T01:21:32Z")
> [@woodstockbirdybird](#): > > ETA: Speaking of bad late-night tacos, what the hell is the meat in Jack in the Box’s version? Crack. 😃 When did Taco Bell start having the green sauce only in little packets I have to put on myself? Seriously, WTF? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-taco-bell-why-cant-i-quit-you/482602.md?page=2)