# Oh, that poor McDonald's actor . . . . **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 5, 2011, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127 "2011-12-05T14:08:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/21 "2011-12-05T18:19:35Z")
[This](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SO8-A396Lt4) McDonald’s clown survived. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/22 "2011-12-05T18:33:43Z")
[Both](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot6xyo-W-1I) of these folks went on to do just fine. ---
**Author:** ![Elret](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Elret](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elret)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/23 "2011-12-05T18:53:55Z")
I’m with you, Eve. Yes, he got money and recognition and whatnot, but _the ding to the dong_?? That’s pretty rough. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/24 "2011-12-05T19:03:15Z")
It might be an interesting thread: WRITE A MCDONALD’S COMMERCIAL IN THE STYLE OF… I think Tennessee Williams would have written great copy for one. [Jessica Lange southern matron character]I’ll never forget the first Chicken McNugget I ever had. My young man took me to the Green Orchid Cotillion, Daddy said I was too young but Mama said ‘Go Esther it’s your one chance ever to have a little happiness’, and my young man took me behind the Linsey’s new Studebaker, and he put it in my mouth and said “Get a good taste of it, lick the sauce off of it, put your tongue on it…”, and then, then when he was finished, he gave me a chicken McNugget, and it was wonderful. And he hanged himself in the barn. Oh, Chicken McNuggets, now with Zesty Italian dressing. [/Jessica Lange southern matron character] ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/25 "2011-12-05T19:07:37Z")
Who do you figure would’ve authored [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFSbEfWg5Rg) vignette? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/26 "2011-12-05T19:10:39Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > It might be an interesting thread: > > WRITE A MCDONALD’S COMMERCIAL IN THE STYLE OF… > I think Tennessee Williams would have written great copy for one. > [Jessica Lange southern matron character]I’ll never forget the first Chicken McNugget I ever had. My young man took me to the Green Orchid Cotillion, Daddy said I was too young but Mama said ‘Go Esther it’s your one chance ever to have a little happiness’, and my young man took me behind the Linsey’s new Studebaker, and he put it in my mouth and said “Get a good taste of it, lick the sauce off of it, put your tongue on it…”, and then, then when he was finished, he gave me a chicken McNugget, and it was wonderful. And he hanged himself in the barn. Oh, Chicken McNuggets, now with Zesty Italian dressing. > [/Jessica Lange southern matron character] _slow clap_ But now I really don’t want a chicken mcnugget. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/27 "2011-12-05T19:11:55Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > Who do you figure would’ve authored [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFSbEfWg5Rg) vignette? Ike Turner, but he’d have delivered the lines differently. “Look here, we ain’t going to no play, no concert, no symphony, we going to a movie bitch, you pay and I choose.” ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/28 "2011-12-05T19:28:14Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > [Both](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot6xyo-W-1I) of these folks went on to do just fine. I saw the name before the commercial even started but it took until the very last scene before I recognized her. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/29 "2011-12-05T19:41:19Z")
_Scene opens on a crime scene. There is a dead nude woman in the floor, victim of a violent death. There is heroin paraphernalia, an ashtray filled three times with lipstick coated cigarette butts, and half a box of Chicken McNuggets on a glass top coffee table. A forensics team is examining the body while the clearly-in-charge trenchcoat clad David Caruso or Jerry Orbach type detective fiddles with the items on the table._ Forensic Team Member 1: Are you getting the same results from the lividity? Yet the blood spatter here is obviously post mortem? Forensic Team Member 2: Yes… somebody clearly had sex with her hours after she was dead. Detective, any theories? _Detective puts the remnants of a small plastic bag full of powder into his pockets, then picks up a McNugget from the box, dips it in an open sauce container, and eats it._ Detective: Well, I guess I’m not the only one who thinks that some things are just as good to dip it in when they’re cold… like this McNugget with this new Honey Garlic dipping sauce. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/30 "2011-12-05T19:50:19Z")
> [@Le\_Ministre\_de\_l\_au-dela](#): > > For most of us, our next project is what ever we can get or get out of the business. I never understood what was wrong with any project that pays the mortgage and puts food on the table. Isn’t one’s responsibility to ones family providing for them? Artistic merit is nice, but a roof over your head and food on the table is pretty damned important. ---
**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/31 "2011-12-05T19:59:15Z")
You don’t know what I’m up against: because it’s full of, of, of things that are only correct because they’re grammatical but they’re tough on the ear, you see; this is a very wearying one, it’s unpleasant to read. I can’t make out what the guy at the end with a mouthful of food is saying. It sounds like, “F, I totally avert your shrine.” ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/32 "2011-12-05T20:59:09Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > [Both](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot6xyo-W-1I) of these folks went on to do just fine. The guy in the sling looked familiar, too. ---
**Author:** ![Le\_Ministre\_de\_l\_au-dela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/le_ministre_de_l_au-dela/32/12181_2.png) [@Le\_Ministre\_de\_l\_au-dela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Le_Ministre_de_l_au-dela)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/33 "2011-12-05T21:03:16Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > I never understood what was wrong with any project that pays the mortgage and puts food on the table. Isn’t one’s responsibility to ones family providing for them? > > Artistic merit is nice, but a roof over your head and food on the table is pretty damned important. Reminds me of this quotation - > [@](#): > > I have never seen it, but by all accounts, it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific. No prizes for guessing who said that - it could apply to many actors and many films. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/34 "2011-12-05T21:19:22Z")
Is that really so much worse than _The Bourne Identity_? Or _Pirates of the Caribbean_ (after Black Pearl)? Let’s face it, there are some movies with really stupid lines that anyone with a brain would feel idiotic saying, yet the lines get said, with emotion even! That isn’t even the most brainless (most brainless would be the actress who had to say, “What does mountain-grown mean?” or “Oh, Mrs. Olson, it’s my coffee. I think he’s going to leave me!”) And actually, it did kinda make we want a nugget. Not enough to go across the alley to get one, but… ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/35 "2011-12-05T22:00:17Z")
I’m with Eve. It is high on my hate list (although they haven’t played it in my area for a while.) I almost wish I ate there so that I could stop eating there in protest. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/36 "2011-12-05T22:09:05Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > But seriously, those _lines!_ That _script!_ I hope he does go on to earn a fortune and win twelve Oscars, but can you imagine the horror on his face the first time he realized those words were going to have to come out of his mouth? Doing \*porn \*would be less humiliating. Poor bastard. But that guy can always take his paycheck and and do _Long Days Journey into Night_ at a community theater. He’s still in a better place than the people doing community theater who don’t have a McDonald’s gig on their resumes. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/37 "2011-12-05T22:25:18Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ddn2phZO0ks](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ddn2phZO0ks) > > The commercial is so badly written and ham-handed that I would ordinarily lunge for the remote and mute it, but I am frozen with pity for that poor young actor, who probably went to acting school and had to convince his parents that he didn’t want to become a lawyer or a doctor and then he moved to New York or L.A. and lived ten to an apartment and made the rounds and sent out his headshot and waited tables, hoping and hoping to become . . . well maybe not the next Bradley Cooper, but at least get good character roles. > > And \*this \*is what he is doing. \*These \*are the lines he has to say. And he was no doubt happy to get this job, and the actors who _didn’t_ get it envied him. > > It doesn’t make me want to buy nuggets, it makes me want to go to bed for a week in sorrow, and also thank my lucky stars I am not an actress. I think you may be overthinking this just a little bit. It’s a McDonald’s commercial, not _Breaking Bad_. The Meloni commercial–now that’s painful. ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/38 "2011-12-05T22:32:15Z")
Well at least he does an okay job with the lines. He’s clearly likable and natural in front of the camera, it’s a shame that he has to read those ghastly lines. But maybe it’s a stepping stone to stardom. Fer instance, here’s a [Daniel Tosh](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YVc9r5I4Qo) in a terrible Taco Bell ad looking absolutely horrendous. Years later, he is a reasonably big deal. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/39 "2011-12-05T22:45:57Z")
> [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](#): > > But maybe it’s a stepping stone to stardom. > > Fer instance, here’s a Daniel Tosh in a terrible Taco Bell ad looking absolutely horrendous. Years later, he is a reasonably big deal. Heck, here’s [Julianna Margulies](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQ3oypDd1Cc) in a terrible McDonald’s ad looking absolutely lively! Who could’ve predicted the flat affect that would make her a star? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2011, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127/40 "2011-12-05T22:55:35Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Wow… all you’d need is a gay guy with a mysterious cough and that commercial would perfectly encapsulate the early 1980s. I have a sudden urge to put my hair up in a banana clip and peg my jeans. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-that-poor-mcdonalds-actor/605127.md?page=3)