# Oh why must you make it so hard to take your tragedy seriously. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 15, 2013, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551 "2013-07-15T12:45:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/21 "2013-07-15T16:44:04Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > Speaking of which, in the spirit of words like defenestration, there should be a word meaning “fallen on by cow” to simply these matters. The word would appear to be “cataboustrage”. I’m going to check my sources tonight. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/22 "2013-07-15T16:55:54Z")
Bovinestration. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/23 "2013-07-15T17:32:35Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > The word would appear to be “cataboustrage”. I’m going to check my sources tonight. Yeah, you wouldn’t want to steer us wrong. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/24 "2013-07-15T17:42:26Z")
> [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](#): > > Yeah, you wouldn’t want to steer us wrong. Puns are bullsh-t. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/25 "2013-07-15T23:32:25Z")
What kind of cow weighs 3000 pounds? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/26 "2013-07-16T00:05:31Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > What kind of cow weighs 3000 pounds? A large one. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/27 "2013-07-16T00:10:41Z")
> [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](#): > > Yeah, you wouldn’t want to steer us wrong. True, there’s a lot at steak. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/28 "2013-07-16T00:11:36Z")
In keeping with Brazilian Mourning Tradition, she’ll have to wear a veal for 90 days. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/29 "2013-07-16T00:30:03Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > What kind of cow weighs 3000 pounds? One that’s driving a Honda Civic. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/30 "2013-07-16T00:55:43Z")
At least the cow saved him from a lingering death by asbestosis, and that’s no bull. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/31 "2013-07-16T01:10:35Z")
[Obey the CowGod!](http://youtu.be/LggnaBS0vXQ) ---
**Author:** ![Accidental\_Martyr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ce7236/32.png) [@Accidental\_Martyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Accidental_Martyr)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/32 "2013-07-16T01:17:10Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > That’s snicker awful bwah hah hah! > > I can’t help hearing this in the voice of one of Monty Python’s middle-aged women. I don’t like cows!! ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/33 "2013-07-16T01:22:41Z")
You know, some of these puns ain’t calf bad. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/34 "2013-07-16T02:07:27Z")
Next on SyFy: \* Cownado!\* The OP story sounds like a Gary Larson comic. ---
**Author:** ![Chief\_Pedant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@Chief\_Pedant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chief_Pedant)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/35 "2013-07-16T04:01:54Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > A large one. No. Not even a female gaur weighs 3,000 lbs. And I did not read about this in the Weekly World News, which is more or less the standard for reporting oddball things that happen in oddball places. Therefore, I think the whole thing is made up. I’m pretty sure the cow story is a cover up from the asbestos industry. The guy died of mesothelioma from his roof. ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/36 "2013-07-16T04:26:54Z")
> [@Chief\_Pedant](#): > > I’m pretty sure the cow story is a cover up from the asbestos industry. The guy died of mesothelioma from his roof. Next, on late-night legal commercials: “Have you or a loved one suffered injury or death from living under an asbestos roof? Has a cow fallen into your lap, releasing dangerous amounts of [del]milk[/del] asbestos dust? You may be entitled to substantial legal awards. Call +011 55 21 ROOF BULL today.” ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/37 "2013-07-16T04:32:22Z")
> [@Chief\_Pedant](#): > > Therefore, I think the whole thing is made up. > > I’m pretty sure the cow story is a cover up from the asbestos industry. The guy died of mesothelioma from his roof. If not, then he died from _Bos primigenius taurus_ from his roof. ---
**Author:** ![Chief\_Pedant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@Chief\_Pedant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chief_Pedant)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/38 "2013-07-16T04:50:12Z")
It is well past the Pedant’s bedtime. But this story is still making stuff come out my nose. Thanks. I did realize, sitting here, that if you sing Adele’s “Skyfall” but substitute “cow” for “sky” you are able to wrest from this tragedy a sort of Pythonesque nobility for someone (the mom, maybe?) facing this particular event. \ ***"Cow fall"** This is the end Hold your breath and count to ten Feel the earth move and then Hear my heart burst again For this is the end I’ve drowned and dreamt this moment So overdue I owe them Swept away, I’m stolen Let the cow fall When it crumbles We will stand tall Face it all together Let the cow fall When it crumbles We will stand tall Face it all together At cow fall That cow fall…\* ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/39 "2013-07-16T04:56:00Z")
How can you people joke about such a moooooving story? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551/40 "2013-07-16T07:53:54Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > How can you people joke about such a moooooving story? Is it cruel to make jokes when someone has died in such a manner? Hmm, I will have to ruminate about this. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-why-must-you-make-it-so-hard-to-take-your-tragedy-seriously/663551.md?page=3)