# Oi! Get your finger outta me bum! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 20, 2015, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519 "2015-03-20T18:28:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/21 "2015-03-20T21:01:31Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > At least he didn’t have DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL HOOKS! > > (Old Dopers will remember that one) Ah good times. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/22 "2015-03-20T21:16:01Z")
[old joke] Hey… wait a second… that’s not your finger!! [/old joke] ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/23 "2015-03-20T22:43:43Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > I never get why men so frequently complain about prostate exams here. While there’s certainly nothing to look forward to, it isn’t really painful or uncomfortable in my experience. It’s gay panic. If they didn’t make faces about it and profess loudly their discomfort (y’know, like a manly man), then maybe that meant they enjoyed it! PANIC PANIC PANIC! ---
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/24 "2015-03-20T23:18:11Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > [old joke] > Hey… wait a second… that’s not your finger!! > [/old joke] One time I was at the doctor and he told me he had to check my prostate. So I bend over and feel his finger go in me. It was then I realized both of his hands were on my shoulders. I swear I will never go to that dentist again ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/25 "2015-03-20T23:31:13Z")
> [@Icarus](#): > > It’s gay panic. If they didn’t make faces about it and profess loudly their discomfort (y’know, like a manly man), then maybe that meant they enjoyed it! PANIC PANIC PANIC! Yeah. NO! It isn’t. I’m not gay, nor am I homophobic and I don’t like it AT ALL. And my doctor is a petite lady. I’m still unsure whether that makes it better or worse. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/26 "2015-03-21T00:02:32Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Wah wah wah - prostate exams… 😛 Come back when you’re on the table with your feet in stirrups as the doctor comes toward you with a stainless steel duck-billed implement - annually. > > Big babies!! 😛 > > Oh, yeah, and they also do the finger-in-the-bum thing at the same time. Don’t forget the scraping. “You’ll feel a pinch” (_OW_) “and you might notice some bleeding later”. I go because of the cancer test. And the birth control. (Doc won’t refill without the exam.) :mad: ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/27 "2015-03-21T00:08:43Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > I concur. And any guy complaining about the prostate exam in a mixed-gender group (such as this) is just asking for the women to laugh at him, given what they have to put up with. (Though I’m curious as well about why their exam includes the finger up the ass, given that women don’t have prostates.) whatever. this is just the usual “starving kids in Africa” put-down. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/28 "2015-03-21T00:45:48Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > At least he didn’t have DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL HOOKS! > > (Old Dopers will remember that one) Haven’t thought about old Mr. \*\*I want Dorrances \*\*in a long time. Thanks for that. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/29 "2015-03-21T00:54:30Z")
Wait – you get a $100 Amazon card just because someone stuck a finger up your ass? Last time I had that it cost ME ten bucks! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/30 "2015-03-21T00:58:06Z")
> [@kopek](#): > > Wait – you get a $100 Amazon card just because someone stuck a finger up your ass? The biometric screening was only half of it. I also had to spend a few minutes doing an online survey. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/31 "2015-03-21T01:06:56Z")
Interesting. I’m a 44 year old woman and haven’t had a doctor put a finger up my bum. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/32 "2015-03-21T01:07:44Z")
I’ve had a prostate exam, but to get a finger in my bum, I guess I’ll have to cross the pond to England. On this side, a bum is someone who hangs around Skid Row a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/33 "2015-03-21T01:19:23Z")
They say ‘bum’ here too. (Lots of Canadians. A whole country full just a few miles away.) ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/34 "2015-03-21T03:23:23Z")
Enjoy a mammogram sometime. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/35 "2015-03-21T03:53:27Z")
Johnny, are you not a helicopter pilot? I would guess that you have sucked up so much seat, that a doctors digit would be difficult to even notice. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/36 "2015-03-21T03:57:11Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Wah wah wah - prostate exams… 😛 Come back when you’re on the table with your feet in stirrups as the doctor comes toward you with a stainless steel duck-billed implement - annually. > > Big babies!! 😛 > > Oh, yeah, and they also do the finger-in-the-bum thing at the same time. I was just going to say the same thing. One of the resident physicians at the hospital where I used to work said her 8-year-old daughter thought she wanted to be a doctor too, “until she found out that doctors have to stick their fingers up people’s butts.”:eek: 😃 I could just picture this woman walking in the door and a young girl says, “Mommy, did you have to stick your finger up anyone’s butt today?” As for the pelvic exam, I have a very good-looking doctor and more than one woman has told me, “He can give me a breast exam any day!” 😛 Trust me, it isn’t any different when he does it. One time when he was doing my “girly checkup”, he kind of rolled his eyes and said, “People have no idea how many times a day we have to do this.” ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/37 "2015-03-21T03:58:57Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > Interesting. I’m a 44 year old woman and haven’t had a doctor put a finger up my bum. It used to be a routine part of the pelvic exam, but my doctor doesn’t routinely do them on premenopausal women. Sometimes they need to test rectal sphincter tone, especially if the woman has had a difficult delivery (I’ll spare any further details), and of course there’s rectal cancer and internal hemorrhoids that sometimes lurk in there. ---
**Author:** ![Elemenopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b5e925/32.png) [@Elemenopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elemenopy)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/38 "2015-03-21T04:48:34Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > Interesting. I’m a 44 year old woman and haven’t had a doctor put a finger up my bum. Yeah, I’m 37 and have never had that either…and have had lots of attention down there due to babies and cystic ovaries and such. Should I feel neglected? ---
**Author:** ![Ken001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/43a26b/32.png) [@Ken001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ken001)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/39 "2015-03-21T10:00:34Z")
In Australian rugby league there is a famous “Dr Hopoate” player with expertise in this area… [https://www.google.co.nz/search?q=hopoate+finger&sa=X&biw=1188&bih=585&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&ei=-D8NVfT-PI378QWd3oHAAg&ved=0CCYQsAQ&dpr=1.15](https://www.google.co.nz/search?q=hopoate+finger&sa=X&biw=1188&bih=585&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&ei=-D8NVfT-PI378QWd3oHAAg&ved=0CCYQsAQ&dpr=1.15) ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519/40 "2015-03-21T11:39:56Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Wah wah wah - prostate exams… 😛 Come back when you’re on the table with your feet in stirrups as the doctor comes toward you with a stainless steel duck-billed implement - annually. > > Big babies!! 😛 > > Oh, yeah, and they also do the finger-in-the-bum thing at the same time. This. I don’t know why a prostate exam is such a traumatic event for most guys. It’s a fuckin’ FINGER, for god’s sake. Most things going through that orifice, on a daily basis, are considerably thicker. And don’t tell me that ingoing is different from outgoing, or that it wasn’t “designed” for something going in. Wah wah wah, indeed. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oi-get-your-finger-outta-me-bum/715519.md?page=3)