# OK, Jews, time to hire a lawyer... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 22, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853 "2003-08-22T03:35:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![zev\_steinhardt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/97f17d/32.png) [@zev\_steinhardt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zev_steinhardt)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/1 "2003-08-22T03:35:40Z")
From [this](http://washingtontimes.com/upi-breaking/20030821-023351-5102r.htm) story: > [@](#): > > A dean at Egypt’s University of Al-Zaqaziq is preparing a lawsuit against “all the Jews of the world,” accusing them of stealing gold during the exodus. :rolleyes: My favorite part is where he tells the world that the Egyptians are too stupid to know that if someone steals your gold and your frying pan, that the Egyptians didn’t know enough to go after the gold and not worry about the frying pan… 😃 Zev Steinhardt ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/2 "2003-08-22T03:41:37Z")
Now THAT is the stupidest lawsuit I’ve ever seen. It’s only slightly more stupid than African-Americans suing white people for reparations. Hmmm…I guess you never can tell, eh? ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/3 "2003-08-22T03:48:13Z")
zev: I think that the jews of the world should concede and give all the gold back with apologies. Then of course, it will be only logical that all the egyptians of the world be imprisoned for life for the kidnap, torture, murder and enslavement as well as other crimes against humanity that were perpetrated against the jews during the time of the Exodus. Naturally they will of course have to forfeit all their property and their nation to the jews as well. That would be fair. After all, it was their gold and it was wrong to take it, wasn’t it? I think the jews of the world owe it to the Egyptians to do what’s right, and make the fair settlement that I have described. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/4 "2003-08-22T03:49:22Z")
Crap! They’re on to us! ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/5 "2003-08-22T03:51:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by zev\_steinhardt \* > \*\*From [this](http://washingtontimes.com/upi-breaking/20030821-023351-5102r.htm) story: > > :rolleyes: > > My favorite part is where he tells the world that the Egyptians are too stupid to know that if someone steals your gold and your frying pan, that the Egyptians didn’t know enough to go after the gold and not worry about the frying pan… 😃 > > Zev Steinhardt \*\* ;j Christ ;j, **Steinhardt** , just how old _are_ you? ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/6 "2003-08-22T03:52:40Z")
A truly well-seasoned cast iron frying pan is worth its weight in gold. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/7 "2003-08-22T03:54:52Z")
Crap! They’re on to us! ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/8 "2003-08-22T04:00:46Z")
zev: I think that the jews of the world should concede and give all the gold back with apologies. Then of course, it will be only logical that all the egyptians of the world be imprisoned for life for the kidnap, torture, murder and enslavement as well as other crimes against humanity that were perpetrated against the jews during the time of the Exodus. Naturally they will of course have to forfeit all their property and their nation to the jews as well. That would be fair. After all, it was their gold and it was wrong to take it, wasn’t it? I think the jews of the world owe it to the Egyptians to do what’s right, and make the fair settlement that I have described. ---
**Author:** ![zev\_steinhardt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/97f17d/32.png) [@zev\_steinhardt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zev_steinhardt)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/9 "2003-08-22T04:04:20Z")
The funny thing about this is that the Talmud relates that this sort of thing actually happened during the reign of Alexander the Great. The Egyptians brought a case stating that the Jews owed them for the Exodus. The Egyptians eventually fled (and the case was dropped) when the Jews said that if the Egyptian claim was valid then so was the Jewish claim for back wages. 🙂 Zev Steinhardt ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/10 "2003-08-22T04:08:56Z")
From whom exactly does this Egyptian dude think he’s descended? Islam hasn’t been around that long, you know. I think it’s time for some DNA analysis. Maybe he’ll have to write himself a check. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/11 "2003-08-22T04:13:24Z")
I don’t know who this guy thinks he’s kidding. I mean, what use is demanding cash from us? Doesn’t he realize we control the flow of cash world-wide? Cripes. Some people are just plain _ignorant._ ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/12 "2003-08-22T04:31:59Z")
Here I am hoping this case goes through and the Egyptians get their money. I have nothing agains the Jews, but think of the implications. I get to sue the Spaniards for having brought my African ancestors as slave to this land. And I also sue them for having enslaved my indigenous ancestors. Then as I am also from Spanish descent I get to sue the Romans, and the Moors (that include quite a few nationalities) for the invasion of Spain. With enough time I will think of another few dozens lawsuits. I think I can now afford that flat screen TV I wanted. ---
**Author:** ![Apos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/838e76/32.png) [@Apos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apos)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/13 "2003-08-22T04:33:19Z")
I’d like to see them prove that the Jews ever were in Egypt in the first place, let alone that they took any gold with them when they left. If he manages that, maybe he should sue God for the genocide of the first borns. I hear that guy is LOADED. ---
**Author:** ![agiantdwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8c91f0/32.png) [@agiantdwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/agiantdwarf)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/14 "2003-08-22T04:35:15Z")
The trouble is, who will represent the Egyptians in court? ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/15 "2003-08-22T04:35:33Z")
Of course, if the lawsuit goes ahead, that means that the Jews can sue everyone who opressed them over the years. Egyptians, Canaanites, Babylonians, Assyrians, Persians, Greeks Romans, Visigoths, Huns, Vandals, Moors, Crusaders, Arabs, Ottomans, and most of modern Europe (Spanish, Russians, Germans, French, Italians, English, Dutch…) Tell me if I missed anyone. ---
**Author:** ![agiantdwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8c91f0/32.png) [@agiantdwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/agiantdwarf)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/16 "2003-08-22T04:37:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by agiantdwarf \* > \*\*The trouble is, who will represent the Egyptians in court? \*\* Before I get banned for anti-semitism, I should say that I was only joking and I myself am a Jew. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/17 "2003-08-22T04:41:16Z")
I think it’s funny that someone said “Christ” to **Zev**. I know he doesn’t mind it, just struck me as funny. I like **Apos** ’ take on this. It would first mean having to prove Exodus as a true story and not a collection of (possibly\*)apochryphal stories. Would be interesting either way, but i don’t think lawyers could resolve this particular theological issue. \*just cover’n my ass. No strong feelings either way. But a huge bit of curiosity here. Maybe a GD for later… ---
**Author:** ![SnoopyFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d07c76/32.png) [@SnoopyFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnoopyFan)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/18 "2003-08-22T04:45:47Z")
Um: doesn’t Exodus say that the Egyptians GAVE the Jews the plunder so they’d get the hell outta Egypt and the plagues would stop? ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/19 "2003-08-22T05:11:07Z")
Oooh, can the Jews of the world sue the Iranians and Italians for the destruction of the Temples? ---
**Author:** ![corndog\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@corndog\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corndog_man)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853/20 "2003-08-22T05:16:12Z")
The 3,000 year old statute of limitations has expired. Sorry dude. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-jews-time-to-hire-a-lawyer/196853.md?page=2)