# OK, ZPG: Let's get a room. I'm paying. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 21, 2016, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-zpg-lets-get-a-room-im-paying/763557 "2016-08-21T20:37:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 1\ **Showing post:** 26
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-zpg-lets-get-a-room-im-paying/763557/26 "2016-08-22T13:54:11Z")
OP speaking. Look, everyone: Please, calm down. I know we’re in the pit, but I didn’t want to start another pile-on. I most certainly don’t want to pick on Roma culture. I have zero problems with Roma culture (although I don’t know much about it). I don’t even want to criticize \*\*ZPG \*\*in this thread, particularly. As I said, I think a lot of this may be down to a misunderstanding. If someone belongs to a minority culture and/or holds unusual opinions, what do I care? I come from a small country (and still live in one), so in some ways, whenever I’m visiting the US (or, for that matter, participating on a message board where most posters are American) _I’m_ from a minority culture. I also hold certain opinions that the majority might find a bit odd. My posting history is my cite. However, I am \*aware \*of those things about myself, because they would be downright impossible not to notice. The thing is, what I am observing about \*\*ZPG \*\*is this: In **ZPG** ’s world, her opinions and cultural quirks are not restricted to the minority, and they are not considered unusual. They are commonplace in mainstream American society. To her, we’re the strange outliers, and she simply finds it baffling how we are trying to push our marginal beliefs onto everyone in the country. Let me quote \*\*ZPG \*\*from the “polite things” thread: > [@"Polite" things that are actually impolite](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polite-things-that-are-actually-impolite/762951/147): > > I go out of my way not of offend people and usually follow whatever the accepted etiquette is in a culture as long as I don’t have to commit major crimes or compromise my integrity such as betraying my marriage vows. The thing I find ridiculous and quite frankly offensive is how many people don’t bother to do things the right way according to their own culture while at the same time giving me attitude for not assimilating. Note “the accepted etiquette in a culture” and “many people don’t bother to do things the right way according to their own culture” (we here must seem like that to her). > [@"Polite" things that are actually impolite](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polite-things-that-are-actually-impolite/762951/346): > > I have been in discussions where this question has come up hundreds if not thousands of times in my life. I would say that rather normal for anything as everyday as people getting married. And for many people, it’s not a “silly gaffe”. It’s a great way to destroy a potential happy marriage, ruin someone’s life or destroy a friendship. For some people, marriage isn’t touchy-feely emotions, it’s a serious business arrangement and the decision of a lifetime. The little details matter a lot. Note: hundreds if not thousands of times in my life and rather normal. > [@"Polite" things that are actually impolite](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polite-things-that-are-actually-impolite/762951/146): > > The thing most people do know this at least in every social circle I’ve ever been in. The largest number of people I have ever encountered not aware of this etiquette custom has been you guys here on the Dope and it really surprises me. It’s like hearing people say they’ve never heard of toasters or printed newspapers. Note: every social circle, and you guys here on the Dope and it really surprises me. Doesn’t this, and other posts/threads by \*\*ZPG \*\*make a lot more sense, and come across much more benign, if we assume that she lives in a version of the USA where the majority culture is notably different from the one we’re living in, in our version? I have seen \*\*ZPG \*\*been accused of trying to push her views onto others. I don’t think that’s fair. I think her posts only make sense if she lives in a world where her views, at least to a large extent, are already shared by the majority of others. And now I’m super curious and eager to learn more about that world. --- _[View the full topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ok-zpg-lets-get-a-room-im-paying/763557)._