# Okay, I'll pit the Secret Service morons **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 15, 2012, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809 "2012-04-15T01:39:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Kinthalis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kinthalis/32/16084_2.png) [@Kinthalis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kinthalis)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/41 "2012-04-17T14:56:58Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > [This latest Washington Post article](http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/more-military-personnel-might-have-been-involved-in-misconduct-before-obamas-trip/2012/04/16/gIQAJ3bqLT_story.html?hpid=z1) says the investigation has swept in a number of military personnel as well, though it doesn’t say how many or from what service. > > It also suggests that “practices” like this are a long-standing tradion in the SS – apparently some of their married agents have a kind of motto when traveling abroad, “wheels up, rings off”. I’d love to be there when their wives read that on the paper. Of course you know everyone of them will be all: “But not me hunny, I swear it. I always just stood outside the door and thought of you!”. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/42 "2012-04-17T15:15:22Z")
You just knnow that thete was one guy on the team who went to his room to call his wife and watch HBO who is getting dragged through the dirt with these idiots. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/43 "2012-04-17T15:35:15Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Good OP, possibly with points taken off for misunderstanding what “summarily” means. Agreed, but I think the misused word was debutante. I doubt any of these women was a beginner or making her first appearance. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/44 "2012-04-17T15:49:45Z")
“Honey, no matter where my dick was, my MIND was on you!” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/45 "2012-04-17T17:23:36Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > Agreed, but I think the misused word was debutante. I doubt any of these women was a beginner or making her first appearance. Sarcasm is just lost on some folks. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/46 "2012-04-17T18:03:55Z")
Now the agents have had their clearances yanked. > **[Secret Service clearances yanked in Colombia probe | CNN](https://www.cnn.com/2012/04/16/us/secret-service-colombia/index.html?hpt=hp_t2)** > > Eleven Secret Service members have had security clearances yanked as authorities investigate a prostitution scandal, officials say. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/47 "2012-04-17T18:07:59Z")
At least they got one good yanking they didn’t have to pay for. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/48 "2012-04-17T18:21:17Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Now the agents have had their clearances yanked. > > [http://www.cnn.com/2012/04/16/us/secret-service-colombia/index.html?hpt=hp\_t2](http://www.cnn.com/2012/04/16/us/secret-service-colombia/index.html?hpt=hp_t2) As I noted in the GQ thread, this is some serious shit for these guys. If they lose them permanently, they will be unable to work in any future job that requires even the lowest level government security clearance. This includes a large number of DOD jobs and government contractor jobs. If they’re extremely fortunate, the worst that will happen to them is that they’ll be dismissed from the detail. I have to believe that there is going to be an example made, though, to deter any future transgressions. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/49 "2012-04-17T19:07:22Z")
The current count reported by the Washington Post is 20 agents and servicemen, with 21 prostitutes. One guy must have hired himself some twins. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/50 "2012-04-17T19:45:33Z")
They’ve reassigned and pulled the security clearances of 21 prostitutes?! Wow, this is REALLY serious. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/51 "2012-04-17T20:18:07Z")
Eh, I’m having a hard time getting all outraged over this. Surely Secret Service agents have been banging hookers for as long as there’s been a Secret Service. It’s just that one mope was dumb enough to draw attention to himself this time. I hate it when one guy wrecks it for everybody. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/52 "2012-04-17T22:57:53Z")
Agents bragged about working for Obama: > **[Secret Service Reportedly Bragged In Brothel About Obama](https://www.huffpost.com/entry/secret-service-obama_n_1431128)** > > Secret Service Reportedly Bragged In Brothel About Obama > [@](#): > > Partying at the “Pley Club” Wednesday night, eleven members of the president’s advance team allegedly bragged “we work for Obama” and “we’re here to protect him.” > > The officials spent the night throwing back expensive whiskey and enlisting the services of the club’s prostitutes, according to a bouncer at the club and a police source. Also: > [@](#): > > ABC reports that the agents received services from the “highest category” prostitutes and became combative when the bill arrived. The police were called when the club could not contain the dispute. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/53 "2012-04-17T23:04:46Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > Agents bragged about working for Obama: > > [Secret Service Bragged About Obama: Report | HuffPost Latest News](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/17/secret-service-obama_n_1431128.html) I dunno what the problem is. In the first link, Obama is quoted as saying, “We are representing the people of the United States, and when we travel to another country, I expect us to observe the highest standards.” So they use the highest category prostitutes, as per instructions. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/54 "2012-04-17T23:05:28Z")
So the prostitutes weren’t willing to pay them enough? ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/55 "2012-04-17T23:06:01Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Eh, I’m having a hard time getting all outraged over this. Surely Secret Service agents have been banging hookers for as long as there’s been a Secret Service. It’s just that one mope was dumb enough to draw attention to himself this time. > > I hate it when one guy wrecks it for everybody. Yeah, I think it’s the fact that he owed her 47 dollars and refused to pay that caused the commotion. WTF, man? I would think the SS get pretty good salaries - and as far as hookers go 47 bucks is a steal. How could you not afford that? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2012, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/56 "2012-04-17T23:08:22Z")
I think the 3-way with bagpipes cost a lot extra. ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2012, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/57 "2012-04-18T00:16:43Z")
I think there was a tax dispute and they’re going to file later in the year. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2012, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/58 "2012-04-18T02:47:09Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > I think the 3-way with bagpipes cost a lot extra. Is it just me, or can anyone else not stop thinking about this? If you need me, I’ll be in my plaid sock drawer… ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2012, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/59 "2012-04-22T22:39:05Z")
The guy who posted the stuff on his Facebook page needs to be put in the stupid prison. Facebook? Yeah, that’s totally private!! ---
**Author:** ![colonial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/34f0e0/32.png) [@colonial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colonial)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2012, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809/60 "2012-04-22T22:55:44Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Good OP, possibly with points taken off for misunderstanding what “summarily” means. Points off are yours: OP use of “Summarily” was correct. See Thesaurus: > **[summarily](https://www.thefreedictionary.com/summarily)** > > Definition, Synonyms, Translations of summarily by The Free Dictionary [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-ill-pit-the-secret-service-morons/618809.md?page=4)