# Okay, Which X-MAN Do You Want To Boink? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 30, 2000, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389 "2000-11-30T16:21:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/21 "2000-11-30T23:25:48Z")
A more managable question would be “Who in the X-Men wouldn’t I boink?” Let’s see… Gambit – He always seemed to me like an asshole, the kind of asshole teenage boys were supposed to think was cool. Bishop – A little personality wouldn’t hurt. Cable – With the popularity of Wolverine, Marvel apparently felt it needed more brooding, laconic mystery men. But it got old pretty fast. Jubilee – Cute, but irritating in a teeny-bopper way. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/22 "2000-12-01T00:03:30Z")
Wouldn’t you have to say Jubilee? I mean, imagine the fireworks. ---
**Author:** ![MamaHen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c89c15/32.png) [@MamaHen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MamaHen)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/23 "2000-12-01T01:52:44Z")
Nightcrawler without a doubt, he always turned me on. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/24 "2000-12-01T02:26:46Z")
My ghod, if I had to choose between them, I would take Hank McCoy, though Rachel comes a damn close second. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/25 "2000-12-01T02:52:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by slythe \* > \*\*My ghod, if I had to choose between them, I would take Hank McCoy, though Rachel comes a damn close second. \*\* Furry Blue McCoy or Big Lunk McCoy? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/26 "2000-12-01T03:20:52Z")
I just love his outlook on life, and his agility. Actually, a threesome with Hank and Rachel in the “Danger” Room would be ideal. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lux\_Fiat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lux\_Fiat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lux_Fiat)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/27 "2000-12-01T04:19:27Z")
Kitty Pryde. Definitely. She may be jailbait in comic-book years, but we’ll just get Claremont to write her up to legal age. My first instinct for swinging the other way would have been Colossus, but ever since his entire family died, it’s just been whine, whine, whine from that guy. So I’m thinkin’ Beast. Blue-fur beast (as long as I’m being kinky, I might as well be _kinky_). ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/28 "2000-12-01T08:22:11Z")
For those with a lust for Rogue, keep in mind that her life-essence-sucking powers don’t work in Asgard. One of my favorite “What If” comics concerned what would have happened if the X-Men had stayed in Asgard. Rogue went on to marry one of the Warriors Three because she could touch people with no problem. As for Wolverine, I don’t know why anyone would want him – gay or straight. Don’t his lovers tend to die (or turn into Lady Deathstrike)? ---
**Author:** ![Lazlo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lazlo/32/9678_2.png) [@Lazlo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lazlo)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/29 "2000-12-01T10:41:15Z")
Psylocke! No one else even comes close. Well, Kitty Pryde does. Gay? Hmmmm… Xavier. Think of how he could psychically blow your mind while he’s physically blowing your… nevermind. (okay… I put way too much thought into that one…) ---
**Author:** ![Aghris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecccb3/32.png) [@Aghris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aghris)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 11:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/30 "2000-12-01T11:36:10Z")
Archangel. 'Nuff said. ---
**Author:** ![Trion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Trion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trion)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/31 "2000-12-01T19:01:37Z")
It’s kind of a toss-up between Rogue and Storm for me. Rogue has all that pent-up sexual tension which would be great fun to help her with. On the other hand, Storm is a goddess and Halle Berry is mighty fine. Can I have them both?? As for the Extra Special Bonus Question: Wow. Wouldn’t you just love to have someone ask Stan Lee this question in an interview? Trion: So Stan, if you had to have gay sex with one of the X-Men, which one would it be? Stan: Great question True Believer! I’ll tell you what I tell everyone. That Iceman sure is a hot little number! Trion: Sounds like you’ve given this some thought. Stan: Sure, I think about it. I think about it a LOT! I’d like to take Bobby and bend him… Trion: OK, OK! I don’t need the details. Stan: Excelcior! [sub]The above is from Fictional Interviews #7. Trion is very sorry he typed this and would rather have Nightcrawler. Sorry Stan.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/32 "2000-12-01T19:32:11Z")
Well, there _is_ a persistent rumor among Marvel fandom that Bobby Drake’s kitchen door swings the other way. Not that I’ve ever seen anything really to suggest it in the comics, but you know Marvel fans… ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/33 "2000-12-01T19:37:26Z")
Hmm…Wolverine, Beast, Nightcrawler…Way Hairy, Furry, Furry… ::Tengu develops a theory…:: Nah…I still go with the ‘tail’ theory for Kurt. What? Whaddaya mean weird? Oh…the tail obsession… ::Slinks off:: [sub][sup]But it’s prehensile![/sub][/sup] ---
**Author:** ![Elvis\_Alien\_Love-Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f1d935/32.png) [@Elvis\_Alien\_Love-Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elvis_Alien_Love-Child)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/34 "2000-12-01T19:41:17Z")
I don’t know much about the X-Men myself, but my mother has an unhealthy obsession with Wolverine. She likes all versions of him, but she has a huge of the movie Wolverine right next to her bed. She would gladly leave my stepfather for him if she could. ---
**Author:** ![Elvis\_Alien\_Love-Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f1d935/32.png) [@Elvis\_Alien\_Love-Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elvis_Alien_Love-Child)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/35 "2000-12-01T19:47:05Z")
Oops, that should have been “huge poster of the Wolverine from the movie.” ---
**Author:** ![Wolverine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wolverine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolverine)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/36 "2000-12-01T20:21:06Z")
Straight: Jean Grey Gay: Myself. I am the master of my domain. Plus, I’m the best at what I do. Not considering myself, there’s been plenty of sexual tension between me and Cyclops so it should be pretty heavy. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/37 "2000-12-01T21:05:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wolverine \* > \*\*Not considering myself, there’s been plenty of sexual tension between me and Cyclops so it should be pretty heavy. \*\* Sex with Cyclops? That’s like boinking your…well…it’s like boinking a… Does Scott even have genitals? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2000, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/38 "2000-12-02T06:00:46Z")
He must, **jayjay** , he’s procreated… My list (including all X-teams): Gambit Archangel Longshot Banshee Skullfire Meanstreak Proudstar Pete Wisdom Rictor Shatterstar Havok (as he’s currently written only, I used to hate him worse than Cyclops) Wolverine If I were to change sides: Domino Moonstar ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2000, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/39 "2000-12-02T06:48:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kat \* > My list (including all X-teams): > …Longshot… \ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2000, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389/40 "2000-12-02T14:27:13Z")
I’d pick Gambit in a heartbeat. If I had to choose from the other team, I’d say Magneto (from 1st season of the tv show). Yummmers. Okay so you didn’t mean it that way, my gay choice would be Rogue. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okay-which-x-man-do-you-want-to-boink/43389.md?page=3)