# OkCupid: A Journey **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 6, 2010, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164 "2010-04-06T17:02:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/181 "2010-04-10T11:08:50Z")
I used to rail at my brother to get his goddamn hair cut, because in my opinion he looked a lot more attractive that way, but he used to counter that the girls he went after all loved his long hair, so my opinion really didn’t matter. I suppose he had a point, although I had to question his taste in women after that. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/182 "2010-04-10T16:51:37Z")
Aren’t you gals supposed to say, “cut your hair you god damn hippie?” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/183 "2010-04-10T17:46:16Z")
Well, if I ever get around to getting my haircut I’ll be sure to let all you fawning ladies know. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Rasa](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rasa/32/3578_2.png) [@Rasa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rasa)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/184 "2010-04-10T18:16:36Z")
I looked at a bunch of your profiles, so the visitor from Providence is me. 🙂 I have a general suggestion for photos: try to get a friend to take some of you. For some reason, I find profiles that have only photos that were obviously taken by the subject a little offputting. Especially when the camera is in the shot. This will come out entirely wrong… but I feel a bit more confident about someone who has photos taken by others, like “they have friends/a bit of a social life”. Likely very unfair, but that’s how it is in online dating sites–the smallest thing will make people not bother. And I could be completely on my own in this, so take my advice with a grain of salt! ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/185 "2010-04-10T18:27:08Z")
> [@Rasa](#): > > This will come out entirely wrong… but I feel a bit more confident about someone who has photos taken by others, like “they have friends/a bit of a social life”. Likely very unfair, but that’s how it is in online dating sites–the smallest thing will make people not bother. And I could be completely on my own in this, so take my advice with a grain of salt! No, I agree. But my friends and I never take pictures of anything. So if I _am_ taking a picture, it’s specifically to put online. “Have your friends do it,” you suggest? Well, for every awesome picture of me online there are a dozen that didn’t fit the bill. I’m not photogenic AT ALL. You only see one or two shots from the side of my face because I think I look like a fucking retard from the side, for example. All my pictures are basically preplanned and it would be weird to expect my friends to put that sort of investment into photographing me. ---
**Author:** ![Bright\_Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cdc98d/32.png) [@Bright\_Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bright_Life)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2010, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/186 "2010-04-10T19:36:16Z")
Cut your hair you god damn hippie! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/187 "2010-04-11T03:36:28Z")
Grr. I’ve gotten like three emails telling me that someone rated me 4 or 5 stars on OkCupid and each one showed 9 pictures of girls. So basically I have to find those girls via quickmatch and give a high rating to the one who rated me highly. But I’ve been on this fucking quickmatch thing for ten minutes and rated like thirty chicks without bumping into a single fucking one of the pictures my emails showed me. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/188 "2010-04-11T16:27:10Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > All my pictures are basically preplanned and it would be weird to expect my friends to put that sort of investment into photographing me. Don’t be so sure of that. When my ex-husband was visiting me once, we did a whole photoshoot one afternoon to get “just the right” picture for his Facebook profile (he’d finally decided to get on FB). I didn’t mind doing it–it was fun! ---
**Author:** ![mutantmoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a87d85/32.png) [@mutantmoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mutantmoose)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/189 "2010-04-11T20:59:12Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Grr. I’ve gotten like three emails telling me that someone rated me 4 or 5 stars on OkCupid and each one showed 9 pictures of girls. So basically I have to find those girls via quickmatch and give a high rating to the one who rated me highly. > > But I’ve been on this fucking quickmatch thing for ten minutes and rated like thirty chicks without bumping into a single fucking one of the pictures my emails showed me. ?? Don’t you just pick one of the nine girls to whom you would give a high rating? And hope it’s the one who rated you. Me and this girl rated each other high so I sent her a message saying: “Hey we gave each other a high rating. High five!!” but she never wrote back to me ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/190 "2010-04-11T21:04:59Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > Oh, it’s definitely Alice. Thanks. Not me! ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/191 "2010-04-11T21:19:48Z")
> [@mutantmoose](#): > > ?? Don’t you just pick one of the nine girls to whom you would give a high rating? And hope it’s the one who rated you. No. All nine of the pictures are like one picture, if that makes sense. It’s a collage thing. If you click on any of them it just takes you to quickmatch and you have to wade through endless women hoping to stumble upon one of the nine. I spent another ten minutes doing it this morning and I didn’t come across a single one of the nine shown to me. > [@](#): > > Me and this girl rated each other high so I sent her a message saying: > > “Hey we gave each other a high rating. High five!!” > > but she never wrote back to me ☹ I feel your pain. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/192 "2010-04-11T21:22:25Z")
Um, are you sure it’s not just a gimmick to encourage people to do exactly what you’re doing? To have you spending time wading through profile after profile and therefore potentially chancing upon a woman you might like? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2010, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/193 "2010-04-11T21:25:57Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > Um, are you sure it’s not just a gimmick to encourage people to do exactly what you’re doing? To have you spending time wading through profile after profile and therefore potentially chancing upon a woman you might like? _Sigh._ I probably should have thought of that. Also, I ~do~ see updates from two or three of the nine on my little update bar thingie. I just never happen across them in quickmatch. So I know they’re showing me real people, at least. I hope that isn’t the case. I was sort of puffed up thinking that three girls had rated me highly. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Tanaqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3bc359/32.png) [@Tanaqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tanaqui)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/194 "2010-04-12T07:55:34Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Oh well, I tried. Don’t come running to me when women won’t go out with you because your hair is long and girly. When has long hair ever prevented men from getting laid? I think long hair on men is hot as long as it’s well taken care of. There was this guy in a bar I used to go to who had beautiful shiny black hair that he wore pulled back in a ponytail and I always used to want to touch it… mmm… As for the OP, I think sexual deviancy is just fine (mostly because I was assume it was a joke, or perhaps something just mildly freaky. If it turns out he likes dressing up as Barney or something, not so much–but it wouldn’t stop me from emailing him.) I’m on OKCupid too. Feel free to [critique](http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Tanaqui07). ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/195 "2010-04-12T08:02:56Z")
Looks good I think. Is that a submarine you’re in? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/196 "2010-04-12T08:13:34Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > _Sigh._ I probably should have thought of that. > > Also, I ~do~ see updates from two or three of the nine on my little update bar thingie. I just never happen across them in quickmatch. So I know they’re showing me real people, at least. > > I hope that isn’t the case. I was sort of puffed up thinking that three girls had rated me highly. :smack: MyYearbook has something like this called “Secret Admirer”, but you get 9 pictures, and only one of them likes you. You pick which ones you like, and, if you picked the one that picked you, both of you get told. Unfortunately, it’s only then that you get to see their profile. I think the App is also available on Facebook. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/197 "2010-04-12T08:31:16Z")
> [@Tanaqui](#): > > When has long hair ever prevented men from getting laid? I think long hair on men is hot as long as it’s well taken care of. There was this guy in a bar I used to go to who had beautiful shiny black hair that he wore pulled back in a ponytail and I always used to want to touch it… mmm… My hair is super sexy, tyvm. :rolleyes: > [@](#): > > As for the OP, I think sexual deviancy is just fine (mostly because I was assume it was a joke, or perhaps something just mildly freaky. If it turns out he likes dressing up as Barney or something, not so much–but it wouldn’t stop me from emailing him.) Dressing up as Barney wouldn’t stop you from emailing a guy? Well, in that case… > [@](#): > > I’m on OKCupid too. Feel free to [critique](http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Tanaqui07). So that was you! I was on earlier and saw that someone from Tokyo looked at my page and briefly thought “wtf?” before I remembered this thread. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/198 "2010-04-12T08:34:03Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > MyYearbook has something like this called “Secret Admirer”, but you get 9 pictures, and only one of them likes you. You pick which ones you like, and, if you picked the one that picked you, both of you get told. Unfortunately, it’s only then that you get to see their profile. You only get to pick one? That makes it cumbersome… I mean, I’m going to pick the one I’m most interested in every time, but that doesn’t mean I’m not interested in the person who actually picked me out. Ghey. > [@](#): > > I think the App is also available on Facebook. I’m on Facebook, but I don’t have any friends there. Oh well. In other news (cough - shameless self-promotion - cough), I’ve published my super-scientific findings [here](http://www.theinfamousnick.com/blog/okcupid1.html) (now with pictures!). ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/199 "2010-04-12T08:35:31Z")
> [@Tanaqui](#): > > I’m on OKCupid too. Feel free to [critique](http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Tanaqui07). Popping in to say that I’d hit you up if I were in the area. But I’m not sure women (especially pretty ones) need to worry as much about the content of their profile. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2010, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164/200 "2010-04-12T08:37:15Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > But I’m not sure women need to worry as much about the content of their profile. Ya rly. I’ve seen women with the word “blah” spammed in their profile to hit 1k words get the “amazing profile” award from guys. No, I don’t think the award was given sarcastically. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-a-journey/535164.md?page=11)