# OkCupid: I signed up **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 24, 2014, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106 "2014-02-24T15:27:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/21 "2014-02-25T02:41:16Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I’m a 51 year old white guy. Why is a 30 year old black woman in Washington DC messaging me? Speaking from personal experience, some black women think white guys in their 50’s are hot. No, really! ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/22 "2014-02-25T02:41:45Z")
I went and looked at OK Cupid. Turns out I had an inactive account from 2004ish, last accessed some time in 2009. If I can get out of my current troubles, I may give it a go again. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/23 "2014-02-25T02:45:10Z")
When I was on OKC, I once got a message from a woman who was using a picture of Beyonce in her profile. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/24 "2014-02-25T02:46:25Z")
In general you’ll want to answer more questions and look for people with higher match percentages. The more questions you answer, the more exact it’s going to be. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/25 "2014-02-25T02:52:09Z")
I’m not sure how I feel about a website that designates people as enemies. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/26 "2014-02-25T02:52:24Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > When I was on OKC, I once got a message from a woman who was using a picture of Beyonce in her profile. So was it really Beyonce? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/27 "2014-02-25T02:56:21Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > So was it really Beyonce? I wrote her and said, “You look just like Beyonce…” She answered, “I thought that it looked like me. Since I am older than Beyonce, she would look like me.” :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/28 "2014-02-25T02:59:10Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > I’m not sure how I feel about a website that designates people as enemies. I don’t think you’re supposed to take it seriously. I never paid it any mind. ---
**Author:** ![Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/43a26b/32.png) [@Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pine_Fresh_Scent)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/29 "2014-02-25T03:50:35Z")
Here’s an interesting [Wired.com](http://Wired.com) article on how OkCupid’s question/answer matching system works. [How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love](http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2014/01/how-to-hack-okcupid/) > [@](#): > > OkCupid’s algorithms use only the questions that both potential matches decide to answer, and the match questions McKinlay had chosen—more or less at random—had proven unpopular. When he scrolled through his matches, fewer than 100 women would appear above the 90 percent compatibility mark. And that was in a city containing some 2 million women (approximately 80,000 of them on OkCupid). On a site where compatibility equals visibility, he was practically a ghost. > > He realized he’d have to boost that number. If, through statistical sampling, McKinlay could ascertain which questions mattered to the kind of women he liked, he could construct a new profile that honestly answered those questions and ignored the rest. He could match every woman in LA who might be right for him, and none that weren’t. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/30 "2014-02-25T04:06:31Z")
A lot of the match questions are kind of goofy. I could probably live with someone who is only a 50% match, as long as a half dozen or so MAJOR questions and answers were aligned: important things like religion, smoking, drug use, and kids, you know? The rest of it is fluff. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/31 "2014-02-25T04:24:12Z")
Then skip the fluff questions or assign them lower importance. It’s set up to allow you to do that. And man, does the marijuana question come up a lot. I remember answering it once and then seeing variations on it over and over and over again as I kept answering other questions. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/32 "2014-02-25T04:51:04Z")
> [@Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](#): > > Here’s an interesting [Wired.com](http://Wired.com) article on how OkCupid’s question/answer matching system works. > > [How a Math Genius Hacked OkCupid to Find True Love](http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2014/01/how-to-hack-okcupid/) I used to hang out in the math building at Waterloo. Clearly, I wasn’t taking that far enough… ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/33 "2014-02-25T05:52:21Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > When I was on OKC, I once got a message from a woman who was using a picture of Beyonce in her profile. Bold. 🙂 > [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > I wrote her and said, “You look just like Beyonce…” She answered, > > “I thought that it looked like me. Since I am older than Beyonce, she would look like me.” > > :dubious: “You know what else looks like you? A picture of you.” ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/34 "2014-02-25T05:53:09Z")
He was THISclose to being **Fear Knowles-Itself**. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Doom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Dr\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Doom)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/35 "2014-02-25T13:29:12Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > In case you care what they mean: > > Friend % is based on how many questions you answered identically. Say you and a woman both say that you love strap-on dildos, you’ll get a Friend % bump. > > Match % is based on how many questions you answered that put one another in the green. Say both you and the woman like strap-on dildos, but you each want to be the one getting railed by them and not doing the railing, your Match % will decrease (but your Friend % will get another bump!). > > Enemy % is just a sort of cumulative inverse of the previous two categories. Say you love getting railed by strap-on dildos but the woman not only doesn’t want to rail you with one, but hates strap-on dildos altogether! Well, your Enemy % will go up. And this, Ladies and Gentlemen, is a perfect example of why the SDMB exists. Ignorance Railed! ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Doom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Dr\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Doom)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/36 "2014-02-25T13:30:36Z")
**Leaffan** I am curious why you chose OK Cupid as your online dating site, opposed to some other popular sites. ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/37 "2014-02-25T14:39:20Z")
I have alot of friends that have found love on-line so I wish you the best. My advice would be, send messages, reply to everyone and don’t get discouraged. One of my best friends from University almost gave up and was about to delete his profile when suddenly he got a message from the amazing woman who became his wife, they’ve been together 12 years now. Funny story…on his suggestion, I checked out the site. I received quite alot of mail and received a few of messages from one particularly attractive woman. At the time, I was going through a rough patch, drinking and smoking alot , and was not emotionally or financially stable enough to deal with a relationship. To be honest, I was embarrassed about my state of affairs and thought she wouldn’t be interested in me so I didn’t pursue it. Life went on, things got better, I met my wife, better job, I quit smoking and drinking, house + 3 kids, etc… Then a couple of years ago, I was friended on Facebook by the girl that I have had a crush on since we were kids. From what I’d heard she also liked me, but the circumstances were never right and we never dated. Imagine my shock when I realized she had the same profile pic as the woman from the dating site years ago and I hadn’t recognized her! While catching up she told me that she actually met her new husband on-line. As far as I know, she didn’t recognize me either but it still haunts me. My own “dream girl” contacted me on a dating site and I passed her by! Stupidity, Pride, or Fate? Who knows? I’m absolutely happy with my life now, but sometimes I do wonder “What-if?”. The moral of the story, I guess, is to explore and get to know each person, you may be surprised who they turn out to be. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/38 "2014-02-25T16:12:39Z")
> [@Dr\_Doom](#): > > **Leaffan** > > I am curious why you chose OK Cupid as your online dating site, opposed to some other popular sites. I don’t know. I have no experience in any of this, and it was the first one that came to mind. Is there something missing from OkCupid that other sites provide? ---
**Author:** ![OurLordPeace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e8c25b/32.png) [@OurLordPeace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OurLordPeace)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/39 "2014-02-25T17:47:08Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I don’t know. I have no experience in any of this, and it was the first one that came to mind. Is there something missing from OkCupid that other sites provide? It’s free, and the volume of people on it seems pretty high. With that said, I’ve had no luck with it. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Doom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Dr\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Doom)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2014, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106/40 "2014-02-25T17:52:48Z")
The TV ads I see most frequently are for [Match.com](http://Match.com) and [eHarmony.com](http://eHarmony.com). I’m fairly sure that both charge money for membership. I can’t recall the last time I saw an ad for OK Cupid, although I do remember seeing them at some point in the last few years. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/okcupid-i-signed-up/682106.md?page=3)