# Olbermann rant about Michael Chertoff's GUT **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 13, 2007, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595 "2007-07-13T03:17:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/21 "2007-07-13T19:31:55Z")
[QUOTE=I Love Me, Vol. I] The whole point of the “Al Qaida strongest than since 9/11” propaganda released at this moment in time wasn’t so much to scare the American public about another attack on U.S.soil, as it was to bolster support for spending more blood and treasure in the Mesopotamian Vortex. [/QUOTE] The irony is that by fanning the Al Qaeda smoke-screen (undoubtedly to deflect Iraq criticism) the Bushies are just opening themselves up for more criticism. Six years after 9/11, and Al Qaeda is stronger than ever? Nice job, morons. (Which leads to another rant…can we stop referring to Pakistan as “a key ally in the war on terror.”? They’re harboring our #1 enemy, for god’s sake. Doesn’t sound like an ally to me.) ---
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/22 "2007-07-14T04:51:20Z")
[QUOTE=Miller] Aw, man, I was hoping this would link to a video of Keith Olbermann making fun of Chertoff for being fat. "Over the course of the last six years of this administration, it has become increasingly clear that Michael Chertoff is a fatty fat-ass McPhaterson. Not since the days of William Howard Taft has the White House been host to such a shameless display of corpulence. Mr. Chertoff, **I say to you:** lose some weight, blob butt. I’m Keith Olbermann. Good night, and good luck." [/QUOTE] Since Chertoff’s nickname is “Skelator”, I doubt if you will see this particular rant in the near future. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/23 "2007-07-14T05:25:50Z")
The shit used to sell, and sell good. Back when Bush was still The Leader, he would talk about how he trusted in his “gut instinct”, a trait much admired of macho men. Its just like feminine intuition, except its very different. Real men trust their\* gut instincts\*, its part of the equipment of a natural born Leader of Men. Like Custer. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/24 "2007-07-14T20:13:44Z")
[QUOTE=BobLibDem] It’s a win-win for the administration every time they pull this stunt. If the attack comes, they can say “See, we told you! We told you there’d be an attack but once those wimpy Democrats took control of Congress, this was bound to happen.” If the attack doesn’t come they can say “See, in spite of those namby-pamby Democrats, we’ve kept you safe from the boogeyman.” [/QUOTE] I’m still paying attention and I agree with your gut-level, instinctual, scientific and intelligence-based assessment of this stunt. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2007, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/25 "2007-07-15T23:21:25Z")
[QUOTE=elucidator] The shit used to sell, and sell good. Back when Bush was still The Leader, he would talk about how he trusted in his “gut instinct”, a trait much admired of macho men. Its just like feminine intuition, except its very different. Real men trust their\* gut instincts\*, its part of the equipment of a natural born Leader of Men. Like Custer. [/QUOTE] That was when he could look deep into the eyes of Vladimir Putin, and see into his soul. Then, according to some sources, Bush said, “Be gentle with me,” although Ari Fleischer says that’s not so. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2007, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/26 "2007-07-15T23:49:07Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Carrot] Sometime between 7ish and 11:45 today on NPR Chertoff said he thought of his ‘gut instinct’ more as an ‘informed conclusion’. Can we say 'backpedal into a steaming load of horseshit? Hunches are not based on facts at all, let alone reasoned thought. [/QUOTE] Shit, more like “accidentally revealed part of the plan” in “an attempt to look smart”. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2007, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/27 "2007-07-15T23:53:54Z")
[QUOTE=BJMoose] Waddya expect? Being full of shit often produces a gut feeling. Oh, well. At least they’ve stopped dicking with the Terrorism Alert Color. (Did so right after the 2004 election. As some of us predicted they would. :p.) [/QUOTE] Naw, [it’s still there](http://www.dhs.gov/xinfoshare/programs/Copy_of_press_release_0046.shtm) - I known Foxnews has it regularly on their ticker. I’m fairly certain that CNN does as well. > [@](#): > > WTF? Iraq? What does that have to do with this?? Oh. I see now! You are actually going to spin this into another argument to stay in Iraq for many more corner-turns and Friedmans, aren’t you? (BTW, which is longer a “corner-turn” or a “Friedman”?) No, they sync up. It’s like “The Wizard of Oz” and “The Dark Side of the Moon”. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2007, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/28 "2007-07-16T00:05:14Z")
From [_Armed Madhouse,_](http://www.amazon.com/Armed-Madhouse-Baghdad-Orleans-Sordid-Secrets/dp/0452288312/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-0323301-0796122?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1184543942&sr=8-1) by Greg Palast – Chapter 1, “The Fear”: > [@](#): > > I’m a bit nervous. It’s an “ORANGE ALERT” day. That’s a “low threat” notice. According to the press release from the Department of Homeland Security, low-threat Orange means there will be no special inspections of passengers or cargo today. Isn’t it nice of Mr. Bush to alert Osama when half our security forces are given the day off? > > Hmm. I asked an Israeli security expert why his nation doesn’t use these pretty color codes. > > He asked me if, when I woke up, I checked the day’s terror color. > > “I can’t say I ever have. I mean, who would?” > > He smiled. “The terrorists.” > > America is the only nation on the planet that kindly informs bombers, hijackers and berserkers the days on which they won’t be monitored. _You’ve got to get up pretty early in the morning to get a jump on George Bush’s team._ BTW, [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=428826) thread has, just possibly, some passing tangential relevance to the instant thread. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2007, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/29 "2007-07-19T11:07:23Z")
Did you know there are more nerve connections in your gut than in your brain? At least, that’s what I’ve learned by watching the Colbert Report. I haven’t checked out a reputable source to see if that’s true or not, but I don’t need to, because I know it’s true…I feel it in my gut. ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/30 "2007-07-20T02:01:44Z")
[QUOTE=Merijeek] Naw, [it’s still there](http://www.dhs.gov/xinfoshare/programs/Copy_of_press_release_0046.shtm) - I known Foxnews has it regularly on their ticker. I’m fairly certain that CNN does as well. . . . [/QUOTE] You missed my point. They haven’t raised the alert level to Orange since I don’t know when, whereas before the 2004 election they raised it quite regularly (once, if I recall correctly, at the same time as the beginning of the Democratic National Convention, that hotbed of seditious terrorists and crybabies). ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/31 "2007-07-20T07:01:34Z")
I saw a headline on Yahoo that said that our military leadership in Iraq is suggesting now that they will need _at least_ until November to be able to access how well the surge is going. I think this is where I came in. I’ve seen this part of the movie. This is the scene where he says, “We have to fight them over there so that we don’t have to fight them over here…” It’s easy to remember because it always comes after the part where someone warns us of a likely attack here by the Tareists. President Bush is either getting shorter or he is raising his arms higher when he talks. It is beginning to look as if he is fending off potential blows to his body. The president visited Nashville today. He spoke to a group at Opryland Hotel. I don’t know how they were selected. They he visited a very small mom and pop bun factory with maybe ten employees. Is he just killing time? ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/32 "2007-07-20T10:24:04Z")
As I was fleeing my office to get from the rumbling, smoking, and entirely unknown-at-that-point [incident](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=429375) in Manhattan, one of my thoughts was: “Oh god, what if Michael Chertoff’s gut was _right_?” ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 10:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/33 "2007-07-20T10:44:54Z")
[QUOTE=Zoe] Is he just killing time? [/QUOTE] I’m starting to think that Bush is just waiting for the Rapture, which will come any day now, because after _that_, nobody will care about the war in Iraq anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/34 "2007-07-20T12:54:33Z")
[QUOTE=Zoe] Is he just killing time? [/QUOTE] I wish that was _all_ he was killing. So long as he refuses to even _think_ of doing something different, the number of American GIs (and an unknown number of American contractors) killed will continue to inch upward, while the number of dead Iraqis will skyrocket. But fuck it, right? The only thing that matters is that Shrub’s ego not be touched. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/35 "2007-07-20T17:33:07Z")
[QUOTE=bluethree] I’m starting to think that Bush is just waiting for the Rapture, which will come any day now, because after _that_, nobody will care about the war in Iraq anymore. [/QUOTE] 'Course they will. Where else is the Antichrist supposed to build his New Babylon? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/36 "2007-07-20T17:36:03Z")
Salt Lake City? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595/37 "2007-07-25T10:39:59Z")
[Maybe it wasn’t indigestion after all.](http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/07/25/terror/main3095345.shtml) > [@](#): > > The Transportation Security Administration - pointing to the seizure of bomb-like ingredients at four airports in the past year – has sent out an advisory to airport security workers reminding them to be on the lookout for potential rehearsals of terror attacks by individuals practicing their hand at smuggling contraband onto a plane. Oh, wait. > [@](#): > > “There is no credible, specific threat here,” said TSA spokeswoman Ellen Howe. “Don’t panic. We do these things all the time.” > > The Department of Homeland Security and the FBI both say that while aviation remains a prime terrorist target, they see no credible evidence of any imminent attack in the U.S. Nevermind. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/olbermann-rant-about-michael-chertoffs-gut/411595.md?page=1)