# (Old) Funny things you overheard in the MMP **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [March 18, 2024, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974 "2024-03-18T07:39:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/241 "2024-03-23T22:31:34Z")
Now 6pm, approaching evening & continuing from where I left off w y’all at noon … > [@swampbear](#): > > I have a sad this mornin’. Rose, my ninety-year old friend, died at her assisted livin’ facility early yesterday mornin’. Not unexpected as she was receivin’ hospice care, but still sad. She will be cremated and at some point the family, who are scattered a bit, will have a memorial service and she will be buried in the church columbarium next to her husband. Not a bad way to wrap up a long life when all is said and done. We’ll all be at the memorial in spirit, if not in person. Still and all, sad is right. She lived so much life and now gone. > [@scareyfaerie](#): > > Our flight was very smooth, global entry was speedy (took longer to walk to the kiosk than it did toget from there past the border person and into baggage claim!) Global Entry is probably the single best invention of the Federal Government in the last 10 years. > [@SuntanLotion](#): > > Saw one of the local ferals walking through the parking lot. Feral human, dog, cat, or what? > [@SuntanLotion](#): > > I still refuse to admit I’m one of the “old ladies.,” You’re only as old as you choose to behave. I’m trying real hard to hold the line at about 40. To that end today I shaved off my retirement beard. The immediate comment of my roomie (who has a similar beard himself) was “Wow, you look at least 10 years younger! Big improvement.” > [@peedin](#): > > Sitting here in L.A. listening to my BIL crunch Doritos. This is a noise I never have to hear again. I find that as time goes on I find I enjoy thinking “I’ll never have to [whatever] again” more and more! Such a comforting and savory feeling. Chewy almost. _Sooo_ satisfying. > [@FairyChatMom](#): > > **FCD** is with her and I can go back when she’s thru triage and whatever. > > It doesn’t look good. My poor sweetie is mess. Not sure what to think… Jeebus! I had to delete my comment on your earlier post as now inappropriately light-hearted. FTR, I did not see this post from just above my noon post; it snuck in there while I was editing. > [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Long, scary day. We’re all exhausted. Major hugs to all. Best of luck for the least bad outcome. ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/242 "2024-03-23T22:35:51Z")
There are a lot of feral cats in our area. People put food out, though they’re not supposed to. If they are close, I’ll tap on the window, they look up and I wave. Am so stuffed from the meal. Potato pancakes. Must’ve been 890 calories! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/243 "2024-03-23T22:37:04Z")
The second and bigger storm is supposed to hit us tomorrow. We’re under a weather warning, which doesn’t affect us in our situation, but I wouldn’t want to have to drive in it. It will likely be followed by rain, which is good. Winter’s last gasp? ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/244 "2024-03-23T22:38:52Z")
woah that went from relaxing to dire fast …glad it well sorta worked out I guess? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/245 "2024-03-23T22:39:18Z")
My day was lazy. Roomie Mike and I had a pleasant lunch at a Latin American restaurant. _Sancocho de Costillo_ AKA short rib soup with plantains and cob-corn hunks in a very rich stock/broth bursting with marrowy goodness. Plus salad and a bit of rice. We were joined late by a 40-something Latina lady he knows whose divorce was finalized today. She was giddy-happy. And might well have peeled his pants off right there in the restaurant and gone at it. Despite the fact he’s not interested. Then home, a nap for me, and now Roomie is out with his pals and I’m fiddling here w y’all preparatory to seeking some dinner, probably just a wedge salad; I’m a bit green-deprived. Cheers to all and sincere hopes for the best for all the **FairyChats**. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/246 "2024-03-23T23:03:05Z")
**{{{{{FairyChats}}}}}** ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/247 "2024-03-23T23:45:34Z")
Oh, yeah. There will be deviled aigs for the Easter feast. My deviled aigs. I made the mistake of lettin’ somebody else bring 'em one time. Never again. Besides I must display them in my heirloom [deviled aig dish.](https://www.etsy.com/listing/853147402/vintage-fire-king-egg-plate-fireking?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_ps--home_and_living-power_seller&utm_custom1=_k_722109a4d87212e8ea6d6c5bb15a2366_k_&utm_content=bing_412385671_1298523531504915_81157784660933_pla-4584757335754326:pla-4584757335754326_c__853147402&utm_custom2=412385671&msclkid=722109a4d87212e8ea6d6c5bb15a2366) Ain’t it a beaut! **MOOOOOOM** glad MIL is back home. Hope you all can get a good night’s rest. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2024, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/248 "2024-03-23T23:53:55Z")
Feeling for you, **FCM/FCD**. Sadly, it’s likely to happen again…and again. Wish we could do more but know we all are caring about you. **Pilot** , hope you don’t plan to be that giddy once your divorce is finalized… 😵 **Cookie** , trust the hatches are battened down. We have frost warnings for tonight/early tomorrow here. **red** , had a lot of jackhammering inside the house during my plumbing woes. Nelson would have been ready for the funny farm after that. **JtC** , that’s making pretty good time. Spent several hours with a couple who are in charge of the U9 girls combining and then trying to make up even teams. Took about 2.5 hours and I’m sure we’ll have people mad at us anyway, but we did the best we could. Then after getting it in the computer I went swimming for 1.25 miles along with whirlpool and sauna to makeup for missing yesterday’s workout, and will shortly begin to get the teams parceled out to the coaches so they can contact the parents and get the season underway. Have finished the Lean Cuisine Fettucini and had a bowl of Cheese Balls for ‘dessert’, so my stomach is happy with me now. OK, need to finish processing soccer teams. Take care all. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/249 "2024-03-24T00:42:57Z")
**{{{FCM}}}** $50 pizza night. I ordered a large gourmet pizza, a small Greek salad, and two pieces of baklava. I ate the salad, and the baklava is for The Missus. She said she’d never had – or heard of – baklava until we made the traditional (for me) stop at The Mad Greek in Baker, CA. So tonight will be the second time she’s had it _in her life!_ (Unbelievable!) We’re catching up on the DVR recordings. We’ve watched _Murder By Death_ (1976) and _Night On Earth_ (1991(, and now we’ve just started _Gosford Park_ (2001). ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/250 "2024-03-24T00:54:01Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > and now we’ve just started _Gosford Park_ (2001) One of the best movies ever made, IMHO. I just love it! Fantastic cast, so well acted, superb plot lines. Another thing that contributes to the sense of disquiet is how the camera is never still. It moves continuously throughout filming. I hope you enjoy it, too. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/251 "2024-03-24T00:56:01Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > One of the best movies ever made, IMHO. I’ve never seen it. > [@Aspenglow](#): > > the camera is never still. It moves continuously throughout filming. Which is completely different from the way Jim Jarmusch films. He tends to set the camera and just lets the actors act in front of it. ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/252 "2024-03-24T00:58:03Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > I’ve never seen it. I won’t ruin any part of it for you by describing anything, but I’d love to hear what you think after you’ve seen it. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/253 "2024-03-24T01:28:19Z")
Nobody else here adds mashed potatoes _to_ their patties, as a binder? Home, thank heavens - Long Night whupped my ass last night, as usual. Very much looked forward to a short shift & a long shower, and I’m halfway there! Came home to a completely dark house. Freaked out thinking I was _that_ far behind on bills … ? But nah, _someone_ forgot to leave any lights on when she left the house. Dumb bitch. ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/254 "2024-03-24T01:35:46Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > I hope you enjoy it, too. It’s one of my favorites! ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/255 "2024-03-24T01:50:33Z")
> [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](#): > > **Pilot** , hope you don’t plan to be that giddy once your divorce is finalized… 😵 I’m that giddy now. If Ms. Latina had cast an aggressive eye my way we mighta been famous right then and there. > [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > But nah, _someone_ forgot to leave any lights on when she left the house. > > Dumb bitch. Nope. Wisely economical lady of great poise and wisdom. As to me … Went out to a pleasant bistro, ate outdoors in the calm evening, and had my wedge salad and a nice Chardonnay as planned. Very civilized and virtuous. Probably should have stopped there, but their tenderloin sandwich with onion strings sounded pretty good w a Malbec. So now I’m home, it’s time for bed, and I’m stuffed. Oops. And I even skipped most of the bread. I seem to have a very hard time saying no to temptation. I can hardly wait to add women into this mix. What could possibly go wrong with that? ---
**Author:** ![JaneDoe42](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janedoe42/32/14104_2.png) [@JaneDoe42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JaneDoe42)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/256 "2024-03-24T02:13:14Z")
> [@missred](#): > > They’ll likely pour tomorrow, so they say, so another day of dog craziness. Earplugs come in handy at times. > [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Long, scary day. We’re all exhausted. Hugs to everyone involved. So…currently we are in Arkansas. In a dry county. It just always shocks me that places still do that sort of thing, but I guess it isn’t going to go away anytime soon. It is beautiful here, green with trees. Yesterday I let hubs drive us into exhaustion and he woke up realizing that we aren’t forty anymore so things will be more reasonable from now on. He doesn’t like to make motel reservations because he wants to drive until he can’t drive anymore and then find a place. Last night it took an hour to find a place (that turned out to be pretty ick) and we spent two hours driving around tonight. We aren’t doing _that_ any more either. He’s a smart guy, he’s just bullheaded and refuses to realize that things have changed over the years. For a long time I spent a lot of time not letting him fail. That stopped two days ago and I should have done it years ago. In my tradition of buying weed at least once in every legal state I can, I bought a cart in Tucumcari where they had dispensaries almost on every corner, then when we saw a dispensary in Oklahoma, I stopped and got thrown out by a very apologetic budista. They aren’t recreational yet, but really soon. I wasn’t one of _those_ customers, I walked in smiling and had my ID in my hand. Told the budista what I was looking for and he showed me where they were. I made my selection (Durbin Poison, oh yeah, I’m all over that shit) and then apologized all over myself for not realizing that I couldn’t buy. The drive has been beautiful and once we reached Oklahoma, I started falling in love with the lilacs growing wild on the sides of the roads. Our petsitter has been checking in with us every night. GG is her new bestest friend (poor guy is lonesome) and VBC is her usual “I vant to be alone” self, so everything is normal on that front. Hubs and I are starting every conversation with “If this move happens…” Hubs is also sounding pretty happy to be seeing his cousins again. They grew up close, but then everyone drifted away. Now they are all coming back home again. Well, he’s out of the shower and I’m going to give the laptop back to him. He has monsters to kill and I did bring my mystery project as well as my stand. I have to use them both every day to make it worthwile! Take care all. I am watching what is happening during the day and thoughts and good wishes happen on a timely basis! ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/257 "2024-03-24T02:13:34Z")
Got got yanked out of Smalls before it started, so I could do the 100 and 200 Slide. then got yanked to the 200 Sort Table. Then yanked to the 100 Sort Table. then back to the slides after it went FUBAR. And there was a jam on the 100 belt from Secondary. And one of the belts overloaded beyond belief. _ **BOOM SQUEAL BOOM SQUEAL YIP YIP YIP** _. But being short handed and overloaded gets me ~~perfect consciousness on my death bed~~ OT. So I got that going for me. Which is nice. Since it was late, I went to [Crude Bittery](https://www.crudebitters.com/) to pick up some stuff. They got a ton of cool and obscure stuff. I laundered. I napped. I dreamed I was making illegal cheese in the minefield at RDU airport. \< waves at **Pilot** from Runway 5R \>. Having a Sazarac. > [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](#): > > Hopefully you’ve _Spotted_ the problem. Yeah, but I’d be feline-ing if I said I was happy about it. And Spot likes lick earwax off of my pinkie, so there are weirder things a pet can lick. {{{{ **FairyChats** }}}} Sorry about Rose, **swampy** > [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > Especially when people chew with their mouth open. If you mindlessly crinkle a bag in front of me, be assured I have fantasized about your death. > [@missred](#): > > Poor Nelson was channeling Gordie and has begun to get a little hoarse. Me? Just about gone crazy with the jackhammer noise and the dog barking all afternoon. They’ll likely pour tomorrow, so they say, so another day of dog craziness. When they replaced the windows in the complex, I learned a terrier can literately bark for 6 hours straight. 🤪 > [@LSLGuy](#): > > We were joined late by a 40-something Latina lady he knows whose divorce was finalized today. Sounds like the time my friend C finaized hers. We went on an all night pub crawl downtown .😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/258 "2024-03-24T02:19:36Z")
And I’m home. Pretty easy travel day, save for a very rough approach into windy Vegas. It was a good work week, though we started at an unsustainable pace, which I really felt in my creaky old bones the second day. Turns out we didn’t need to come out of the gate so strong, as we were done by 2 pm yesterday, despite a short day Thursday due to the baseball game. Still managed to log 50 hours including travel, so definitely worth it. ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/259 "2024-03-24T02:25:23Z")
And N.C. State is going the The Sweet 16! _ **WOLF!** _ > [@BippityBoppityBoo](#): > > Hoping there is no Mumper out there deeply attached to Texas A & M 2 of my cousins live in Omaha, so Go Cornhuskers! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2024, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974/260 "2024-03-24T02:32:21Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I seem to have a very hard time saying no to temptation. I can hardly wait to add women into this mix. What could possibly go wrong with that? From _The Notebooks of Lazarus Long_ by Robert A. Heinlein: > [@](#): > > Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks. **JtC** , with [hotels.com](http://hotels.com) and other sites, finding a hotel is so easy just driving and hoping is silly anymore. Hope you can get it into his head on the return trip. **Wheelie** , welcome home. Paycheck should look pretty nice, The U9 coordinator is a ball of fire so I;m letting him input the changes to the rosters, while I supervise and concur from afar. About another hour and I think bedtime will beckon… Catch y’all on Palm Sunday. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-funny-things-you-overheard-in-the-mmp/998974.md?page=14)