# (OLD) It's Tax Time in the MMP!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Tags:** mmp\
**Created:** [April 17, 2023, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780 "2023-04-17T09:56:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 8

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**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/141 "2023-04-19T14:40:16Z")

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**MOOOOOOM** so sorry about Taz. It’s good he is buried on your land as it is a place where he was cared for and was much loved.

**BooFae** as I frequently had multiple finals on the same day, your students get no sympathy from me, the whippersnappers.

**Nellie** we ‘Murrkins would use the term proctor.

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**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/142 "2023-04-19T14:42:57Z")

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[Dragons Blood CW-320 | Benjamin Moore](https://www.benjaminmoore.com/en-us/paint-colors/color/cw-320/dragons-blood)

i plan to paint, i procrastinate, did not get done. the prep just stops me everytime.

fcm, i’m sorry to read about taz. what a gorgeous boy.

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/143 "2023-04-19T14:51:58Z")

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> [@peedin](#):
>
> I’m teary eyed for Taz and Ripple.

Me, too. Monkey got some extra outside time and a dish of gooshy-food, as a result.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/144 "2023-04-19T15:02:00Z")

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> [@swampbear](#):
>
> It’s good he is buried on your land as it is a place where he was cared for and was much loved.

It’s also where he always wanted to go, but we kept him strictly indoors - for his own good. He’d have gotten lost or worst if left to his own devices. So now he can rest forever where he was never allowed to roam.

I thought I’d let Tobias play in the bathtub - the boy loves water! But he also loves pulling the plug, and when the water was gone, wet playtime was over. He’ll figure it out… maybe. I’m making some boxed mac-n-cheese for lunch while he plays with a mandarin orange. **FCD** is at the boat. Playground later - hoping for some nap time after lunch. yeah, right…

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**Author:** ![JaneDoe42](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janedoe42/32/14104_2.png) [@JaneDoe42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JaneDoe42)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/145 "2023-04-19T15:17:43Z")

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**{{{FairyChats}}}**

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**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/146 "2023-04-19T15:18:49Z")

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People were missing, people were late, there was screaming from TPTB. And they keep trying to make me a supervisor. 🤨 Maintainance is changing out the wax ring in my toilet, and the 20th Century industrial florescent fixture in the kitchen. Spot is having none of it.

> [@nelliebly](#):
>
> Cats _submit_?

Well, food coma.  
Glad the eye is a little better.

> [@JaneDoe42](#):
>
> I’m not really knowledgeable about plumbing and foundations,

I read that as “plumbing and _fornication_”  
😃

> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> Our sweet boy left us overnight.

{{{{ **FairyChats** }}}}

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**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/147 "2023-04-19T15:21:11Z")

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**{{{{FairyChats}}}}**

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/148 "2023-04-19T15:37:24Z")

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> [@dogbutler](#):
>
> I read that as “plumbing and _fornication_”

You can’t have one without the other, for certain definitions of _plumbing_…

OK, I’ll leave now.

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**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/149 "2023-04-19T15:54:39Z")

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Well, the carpet guy was here. On the good side, he agrees that the carpet doesn’t have to be replaced, just the wet padding. On the bad side, he found hints of mold that he suggested I talk to the insurance guy about tomorrow and see if a “water mitigation service” needs to come in and check/clean things out. So another day not using my great room.

At least he was early enough that I can get my swimming and sauna in, once lunch settles down in my belly. Another day near 80F without a drop of rain.

> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> So now he can rest forever where he was never allowed to roam.

That’s almost poetic…(sniffles)

**Cookie** , you now have given me an earworm: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C070\_4ya98Y](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C070_4ya98Y) And Kenya in this season is where the great herds are; I have a few memories of the Masai Maru too.

> [@Chefguy](#):
>
> I’ve always had a not-so-secret dread of those damn things.

They sound our alarm every Wednesday at Noon, at least I can check my watch for the correct time..

Glad the eye is doing better, **nellie** And speaking of earworms…[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0cAWgTPiwM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0cAWgTPiwM)

> [@nelliebly](#):
>
> **MetalMouse** , why all the leaks? Is your plumbing really old, or have critters been dislodging/eating/dancing on the pipes? I hope this’ll be the last one.

According to the leak detection guy, he’s been to a number of houses in this area, apparently the contractor didn’t quite do things 100%, so after 20+ years problems are developing. Just hope I’ve had all of mine…at least the last couple have been on the same line, so I now where to look first if it crops up again…which it hopefully won’t.

OK, it’s still to early to head to the gym, so maybe I’ll clean my bathrooms or something. Take care all.

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**Author:** ![TruePisces](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/truepisces/32/13628_2.png) [@TruePisces](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruePisces)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/150 "2023-04-19T16:13:22Z")

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Right now, I don’t have the ability to look back on all the posts that people have posted to make replies. I’m just… not in the best place right now.

Last night, I got a text message from my dad saying that he’s called dialysis, transportation, PT, OT and Home Health and cancelled them all. He said he’s tired of not having any say into what’s going on around him. And he told me he was shutting off his phone for the night, that he’d talk to me tomorrow (today). I tried to get my nephew and my bonus sister to stop by and just check in with him and they both had other responsibilities.

I called him a little bit ago, partly to make sure he’s ok. And he’s not. He’s decided that he can’t do anything that he wants to do and, while he won’t actively hurt himself, he’s not harming himself either. And no matter what I tell him - that he’s helped us kids with everything as we were growing up, that it isn’t about money but about his knowledge. That he’s got stories to share that I want to hear and I want to know. But it doesn’t matter. Because he’s feeling like a failure. He’s feeling old. He’s in pain. He’s just done.

And it’s selfish, I know. Me wanting him to stick around even though he’s in pain. But I’m so angry right now because he COULD do more than he is. If he followed through with his PT and OT, if he didn’t give up on his dialysis. Instead, he’s going to get more and more bloated, more and more sick, because his kidneys aren’t working right. I’m supposed to go up next Tuesday to pick him up for a doctor’s appointment. I’ll be calling him every day. But my biggest fear is that I go up to get him and instead I have to figure out who I need to call when someone has died.

I promised him that I wouldn’t let my sibs or my nephew know what’s going on for a couple of days. I know that they’ll all be calling him, trying to talk him into doing what he needs to. And that will just make him more stubborn. I’m hoping that he’ll change his mind in time. But I did tell him that I’m only holding this information back from everyone for a couple of days. Because right now, I’m shouldering this pretty much alone and I can’t for too long. I’m not strong enough. I don’t know what will happen to me when I do lose my Dad.

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**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/151 "2023-04-19T16:22:07Z")

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I’m so sorry. What a sad, frustrating situation. Could you send him an email listing all his accomplishments, all the reasons you need and admire him, and a frank explanation of why you need him to stick around/would be devastated?  
Sometimes letters/emails have more punch than phone calls.

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**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/152 "2023-04-19T16:25:02Z")

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I am mildly out of sorts today…I think maybe I’m “combo” stressed about my uncle’s funeral (dreading some family stuff), Bailey’s surgery, and some minor drama involving the treasurer of my volunteer branch. Each of those things separately is no big deal, but subconciously the combination might be irritating me. Meh.

In case anyone was wondering if I still have a masochistric streak, I’ve volunteered to help with another proposal at work. 😁 My boss is involved with this one; it’s for her portfolio (a group of programs). They need the help and I have the bandwidth, so what the heck. If it winds up being painful, it’ll all be over by this time next month.

Time for lunch! At the moment I’m leaning toward having tuna on wheat + some apple slices, but that could change in the short walk from the home office to the kitchen. Heh.

> [@dogbutler](#):
>
> Which will probably be a lumpy blanket, with a foot sticking out.

I’ll take whatever part of the new doggy she’s willing to share! 😃

> [@purplehorseshoe](#):
>
> That is TOO COOL for words!

Right?! As soon as I have a handle on the upcoming dog-related costs, I think that will be my next splurge.

> [@dogbutler](#):
>
> the “I wish to complain to management” stare

LOL!!

> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> Our sweet boy left us overnight.

Ugh. 🫂 I’m so sorry.

> [@nelliebly](#):
>
> ( 🎵 I can see obstacles in my way.)

Ha! Glad there’s some improvement. 🙂

> [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](#):
>
> On the bad side, he found hints of mold that he suggested I talk to the insurance guy about tomorrow and see if a “water mitigation service” needs to come in and check/clean things out.

Oh man, it seems like one thing after another for you lately. ☹

> [@TruePisces](#):
>
> He’s just done.

Oh damn. I’m so sorry, for both him and you (and your fam). 💙

Although I sincerely hope he starts feeling better (emotionally) and decides to start taking care of himself before it’s too late, could it possibly help you to start doing the logistics research sooner rather than later? So you’ll already know who to call and what to do if the worst happens, and you won’t have to deal with that while also reeling emotionally?

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**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/153 "2023-04-19T16:26:39Z")

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What an awful situation, **Real Fish**.  
May I suggest speaking to your dad’s doctor to inquire about counseling? I understand his frustration, and he might just be rebelling against what he perceives as everyone else making decisions for him. Talking things out with a professional may help him clearly see what he really wants. And if stopping treatment _is_ what he wants, then counseling may be in order for you as well, to help accept his wishes.  
I’m sorry you’re going through this. Good luck.

**Mooooom** , so sorry about Taz. What a great life you and **FCD** gave him.

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**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/154 "2023-04-19T16:44:12Z")

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{{{ **FCM** }}}

Too many fur babies going away lately.

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**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/155 "2023-04-19T16:52:47Z")

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> [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](#):
>
> **Cookie** , you now have given me an earworm: [GLENN FREY - THE HEAT IS ON - YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C070_4ya98Y) And Kenya in this season is where the great herds are; I have a few memories of the Masai Maru too.

All these years I thought that song was by Kenny Loggins. He did so many movie themes, and his voice is similar. We were in the Serengeti during the great herd migrations. Quite a sight; I kept thinking that it must be what the American west looked like during the bison migrations.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/156 "2023-04-19T17:01:29Z")

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Tobias is napping!!! Sound the trumpets… oh, wait, never mind… 😆

Just found out they’ll have to remove one water tank to install the stern thruster, so that’s a few bucks to exceed the estimate. But they’ll reinstall the tank after so we’ll still carry 170 gallons. Remember what I mentioned about coming in under our estimate? Hahahaha…

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**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/157 "2023-04-19T20:10:24Z")

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Afternoon all. Swimming and sauna are completed, soccer is on the TV, and I may go take some walkies late this afternoon, so all in all not a bad day.

**Cookie** , yeah, I spent $300 (this was over 20 years ago so it’s probably a lot more now) to ride a hot air balloon before dawn over the great herds. Still one of my fondest memories. Had the same thought you did about the American West.

**Real Fish** , I sorrow for you and Dad-unit, it may be the frustration talking right now, try again in 24 hours and he may have had a change of heart.

> [@Misnomer](#):
>
> Oh man, it seems like one thing after another for you lately.

Well, the house is 25 years old so maintenance things are bound to come up, the mold may be more my fault for being an…indifferent…housekeeper.

**Oopsie** , I tend to volunteer too much with the soccer, but as long as I;'m having some fun doing it…hope the stress levels go down soon.

OK, back to the Champions League.

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**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/158 "2023-04-19T21:17:30Z")

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> [@Buttercup\_Smith](#):
>
> Forgot the subject of the thread. I got off with only paying the blood sucking bastards at the IRS only $130 and $325 to the accountant. I spent most of three days on the phone with the IRS last week about the big refund they owe me for an overpayment. The credit was sitting there under hubs social security number even though it was plainly typed at the top of the page that he is deceased. I finally got someone who took a long time and many 5-7 minutes hold times to release it to me as it was a joint return. I am suppose to have a check in 4 weeks (now three). I am not holding my breath. I shan’t believe it until I have check in hand. One bright spot is it is over 400 dollars more than I was expecting.

Having dealt with death of spouse taxes last year, there is a special form that goes with your return to specify that the money be refunded to you if you were not the primary taxpayer = first SSN on your final joint return. Absent that, the money sits in limbo.

> [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](#):
>
> **Real Fish** , I get 2-3 calls a week asking me if I want to sell my property and then they give me an address I’ve never heard of. So yeah, I’ll sell something I don’t own…

For years my wife got calls to sell a particular piece of property we did not own. It was an ordinary tract house in a nearby town in our county. We went to the county real estate tax assessor’s website and found the name and address of the owner. And my wife’s cell phone number.

We tried contacting the tax assessor’s office but since it wasn’t our property they could not change the records even to simply remove the phone number altogether. Contacting the owner was no good either. It appeared the old lady had died and her estate, including the house, was in legal limbo.

Eventually the calls slowed down then stopped.

> [@pullin](#):
>
> > [@nightshadea](#):
> >
> > damn this is a rough year for pets
> 
> Crap. It sure is. Sorry to hear about Taz FCM.

> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> I knew it was coming, but I still wasn’t ready.

Poor Taz. Poor **FCM**. And **FCM** , we’re never _really_ ready. Which leads to this:

> [@TruePisces](#):
>
> … But it doesn’t matter. Because he’s feeling like a failure. He’s feeling old. He’s in pain. He’s just done.
> 
> And it’s selfish, I know. Me wanting him to stick around even though he’s in pain. But I’m so angry right now because he COULD do more than he is.  
> …

Maybe he _can’t_. Not mentally, not physically. There comes a point in any long lingering illness where the memory of feeling even half-assed healthy is so distant, and every step is even harder than the last. Capacity is collapsing while demand is rising. And there’s little to no _realistic_ expectation of either of those trends turning around.

The lines will cross for each of us in our turn. At which point it’s time to say “I quit.” Only the person can know when their time has come. But know it they will, and with an unshakeable certainty. The most loving, caring thing for us to do when they get there is to agree with them and support them in their decision, not to argue with them or try against their will to change things.

We can rage against the Universe and Fate and all the rest. But not around the patient; they’re already full.

Is there unfinished business, more stories you want to hear, more love you want to express? Certainly. There always will be that. The time to work that problem was mostly yesterday and all the many yesterdays before that. Somehow we (and most certainly me) have failed in the foresight more often than not. But don’t compound the earlier error by doing the unhelpful & selfish thing now.

I bet he will refuse the Dr. appointment on Tue. It’s time now to ask Dad about contacting a hospice place and making the appropriate arrangements for short term home care while he wraps up his time on Earth at home in familiar surroundings as much in control of his situation as he can be. We can’t go with him, much as we might want to. We can only watch and hold his hand and demonstrate our love for who he still is. Until he isn’t.

Best of luck for this joint walk down an all too short pier. From which only one returns back to the dry land of normalcy.

The human condition really sucks sometimes. And this is one of those times.

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/159 "2023-04-19T21:38:03Z")

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The Tobester slept about 2 hours, so he was full of piss and vinegar at the playground! And my darling granddaughter was telling some kids there “That’s my grandmother - she’s kinda old!” The adults within earshot got a laugh out of that!

When I ran to Food Lion for Diet Coke (4/$12 this week) I decided to grab a small bag of fried chickie for supper. It was extremely mediocre, but at least it was quick. Now we’re in chillage mode. One more day of wrangling, a day of boat work, then a day of manning a table at the fundraiser for Daughter’s school. Whew!

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**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\
**Post date:** [April 19, 2023, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/old-its-tax-time-in-the-mmp/982780/160 "2023-04-19T22:05:30Z")

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Howdy Y’all! All the stuff got done and sup got cooked and et. Nappage did not get achieved, so I foresee an early bedtime. The stand for the Sanctuary Lamp got unpacked and set up. The thing is heavy! I believe the church house could fall down and it would still be upright. It’s purty though. I’ll put some pics on my book of faces for folks to see.

**{{{RealFish}}}** I have no words of wisdom. I feel **Lily** wrote some eloquent words you can take heart in reading.

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