# Omnibus Evil MFers in the news thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 3, 2023, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496 "2023-05-03T11:05:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 100
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2024, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1981 "2024-11-11T11:44:01Z")
That’s okay. I guess that’s one of the benefits of me being on the other side of the planet. My breakfast was almost fourteen hours ago. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2024, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1982 "2024-11-11T22:35:56Z")
Wasn’t sure whether to put this one in stupid or evil since it’s a little of both… A Wisconsin man who was believed to have drowned in a fishing accident last summer turns out to have faked his death, abandoned his family, and fled the country to hook up with his online girlfriend from Uzbekistan. [https://www.theolympian.com/news/nation-world/national/article295337829.html?tbref=hp](https://www.theolympian.com/news/nation-world/national/article295337829.html?tbref=hp) ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2024, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1983 "2024-11-11T22:47:55Z")
I wonder what the odds are that this girlfriend is real? ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2024, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1984 "2024-11-11T23:17:10Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > I wonder what the odds are that this girlfriend is real Oh, he’s real, for certain. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2024, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1985 "2024-11-12T00:17:41Z")
I was trying for a Yakov Smirnoff format joke like > In Uzbekistan, girfriend \_\_\_\_\_ \_\_\_\_\_\_ But it just won’t quite come together for me. Anyone? ---
**Author:** ![SunUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SunUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunUp)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2024, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1986 "2024-11-12T00:50:28Z")
In Wisconsin, you disappear when girlfriend shows up. In Uzbekistan, girlfriend disappears when _you_ show up! ---
**Author:** ![Eric1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3bc359/32.png) [@Eric1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eric1)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2024, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1987 "2024-11-12T15:06:54Z")
The Archbishop of Canterbury just had to resign because he didn’t handle a child abuse case. Yes your highness - being in charge is a pain in the kiester; dtill you gotta make the tough calls! Saying I’m sorry to the king doesn’t mean anything to the kids, Beavis! ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2024, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1988 "2024-11-12T21:23:44Z")
👏 👏 👏 That was pretty good! ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2024, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1989 "2024-11-13T23:19:33Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > I wonder what the odds are that this girlfriend is real? Well, the authorities _did_ run his passport in Canada, home of all the made-up girlfriends. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1990 "2024-11-14T13:36:25Z")
Asshole dresses up like a bear and rips cars to shreds for Insurance fraud. Oy > **[Person dressed in bear costume to fake attacks on cars for insurance payout,...](https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/person-dressed-bear-costume-fake-attacks-cars-insurance-payout-califor-rcna180075)** > > Video was submitted to the insurance company that alleged to show the animal enter the car in Lake Arrowhead, but officials said it was a person in a bear suit. ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1991 "2024-11-14T14:29:38Z")
It’s a pretty good costume, to give them minor credit. “There are bears at Lake Arrowhead and in the San Bernardino Mountains, which is a forested range about 60 miles northeast of Los Angeles, but they don’t wear costumes.” That last bit seems superfluous. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1992 "2024-11-14T15:32:35Z")
> [@Love\_Rhombus](#): > > but they don’t wear costumes.” That last bit seems superfluous. You sure the bears don’t do the equivalent of this: [![](https://i.redd.it/xd0utc8m0ez71.jpg) ](https://i.redd.it/xd0utc8m0ez71.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1993 "2024-11-14T15:50:14Z")
Oh, my, oh, my, an Evil MFer gets the perfect comeuppance! The Onion has bought the Infowars assets. Quote from the [CNN article](https://www.cnn.com/2024/11/14/business/onion-alex-jones-infowars-auction/index.html?utm_source=cnn_Breaking+News&utm_medium=email&bt_ee=%2ByM4U0TQPyIldf7eEzNc0nsjzvzEjnvejlLuo4RknO2cwZEz57uF2aax%2BPYf%2Bfww&bt_ts=1731594744061): > “The Onion is proud to acquire Infowars, and we look forward to continuing its storied tradition of scaring the site’s users with lies until they fork over their cold, hard cash,” said The Onion CEO Ben Collins. “Or Bitcoin. We will also accept Bitcoin.” ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1994 "2024-11-14T15:55:23Z")
I don’t get this scam. I assume they must own the cars they are vandalizing in order to get an insurance pay out. And if so, aren’t they going to need that insurance pay out to fix up their cars? It appear these are expensive cars so just pocketing the money means the resell on the cars is a lot less. What am I missing? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1995 "2024-11-14T15:58:31Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > What am I missing? 1. trash own car 2. ??? 3. Profit! ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1996 "2024-11-14T15:59:31Z")
Exactly! Step 2 is what I’m missing here. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1997 "2024-11-14T16:01:19Z")
So were the idiots trying to perpetrate this fraud. I think this story belongs better in the Stupid MFers thread. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1998 "2024-11-14T16:01:36Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > I assume they must own the cars they are vandalizing in order to get an insurance pay out. I’m gonna guess that they had tried to sell the cars but couldn’t get what they thought the vehicles were worth. The insurance company would then judge the cars to be totaled, and that figure was more than anybody had offered as a purchase price. Just a guess, however. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/1999 "2024-11-14T16:07:57Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > Exactly! Step 2 is what I’m missing here. Get the money and don’t fix the cars. Or, Get the estimate at the dealership, get the check from the insurance company, get the damage fixed by a local body shop. Pocket the difference. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2024, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/2000 "2024-11-14T20:22:45Z")
Bears, real ones, have broken into my wife and my vehicles about 4 times. No real damage but foot prints and some scratches. We have been told not to lock our cars because then you will lose a few door handles. That’s expensive. They are smart, car doors are easy to swipe at and hit the handle and open them. That’s where you get scratches on your paint. It’s clear when they have been in your car. You go out to it in the morning and a couple of doors are open. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496.md?page=99) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496.md?page=101)