# Omnibus Evil MFers in the news thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 3, 2023, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496 "2023-05-03T11:05:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 208
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2026, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4146 "2026-04-01T14:00:03Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > > She had purchased a massage gun, she told him, instructing him to recline the seat, take off his shirt and hat, and lie on his stomach. She rubbed his back for 20 minutes, and when he “criticized her technique,” reached under the seat for the Glock handgun stowed there, according to court documents. Couldn’t she have retrofitted the massage gun to use 9 mm ammo? \*Up till now, I had been blissfully unaware that there was such a thing as a [“massage gun”](https://www.amazon.com/RENPHO-Thermacool-Christmas-Percussion-Masajeador/dp/B0FF9ZCW62/ref=sr_1_24?crid=3N4ISOGV8ZXAM&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.SQ9tcohO7oHmJSyL8HP1SnmcFslMjLXiGZgkSigzDloyXY4BYLXTIAGHgohLjJ9T9pvhjfGWWQKA3yNfbAqRQNUbmUIv142UcbWzPpNAral7_55XzFCoij6sxuGC0GsMKaDnrmvgA_BQNgyzPdESnazZFz2uCz8QDD22hJtBN5VPZykXRic-QYLkq3nAGIylz_a-D2-EgBMwB0BL7FCeW7qF__-9ZevwkKcFT-eisMsfbstZ27eCATOSYZBVUwrnmX7wJRs3rgy-0lZNSBMaXBgrnoFpjspHdbWehocp19U.vic95BaaCEL9kIJwlcfgccarpnBYFtPpOWmZ9Wnqs08&dib_tag=se&keywords=massage+gun&qid=1775051834&sprefix=massage+%2Caps%2C342&sr=8-24). ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2026, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4147 "2026-04-01T21:38:15Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Up till now, I had been blissfully unaware that there was such a thing as a [“massage gun”](https://www.amazon.com/RENPHO-Thermacool-Christmas-Percussion-Masajeador/dp/B0FF9ZCW62/ref=sr_1_24?crid=3N4ISOGV8ZXAM&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.SQ9tcohO7oHmJSyL8HP1SnmcFslMjLXiGZgkSigzDloyXY4BYLXTIAGHgohLjJ9T9pvhjfGWWQKA3yNfbAqRQNUbmUIv142UcbWzPpNAral7_55XzFCoij6sxuGC0GsMKaDnrmvgA_BQNgyzPdESnazZFz2uCz8QDD22hJtBN5VPZykXRic-QYLkq3nAGIylz_a-D2-EgBMwB0BL7FCeW7qF__-9ZevwkKcFT-eisMsfbstZ27eCATOSYZBVUwrnmX7wJRs3rgy-0lZNSBMaXBgrnoFpjspHdbWehocp19U.vic95BaaCEL9kIJwlcfgccarpnBYFtPpOWmZ9Wnqs08&dib_tag=se&keywords=massage+gun&qid=1775051834&sprefix=massage+%2Caps%2C342&sr=8-24). Lucky you. I’ve had one for years to deal with severe back pain. Sometimes it’s the only reason I can walk. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2026, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4148 "2026-04-01T21:44:20Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Couldn’t she have retrofitted the massage gun to use 9 mm ammo? I mean, if she were Bond villain henchwoman, she probably would have. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2026, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4149 "2026-04-01T22:08:00Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > The act was evil, but is the man? The surveillance video of the attack clearly shows him trying to keep his face hidden, slowly sneaking up behind the guy, looking around a corner to see if the train was coming and if anyone was watching, and waiting until the last possible second to try to shove him off the platform. Evil. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4150 "2026-04-02T13:10:16Z")
After seeing the video, will fewer people look at their phones while waiting for trains? Or at least stay well back from the platform edge while doing so, hopefully. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4151 "2026-04-02T13:54:10Z")
Maybe stand facing towards any people and back to the tracks? And yes, farther away from the ledge. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4152 "2026-04-02T14:08:24Z")
Illinois woman is accused of causing $70,000 in arson damage and attempted murder after catching her lover with another woman. > **[Kankakee, Illinois Woman Arrested After Alleged Domestic Attack, Attempted...](https://countryherald.com/news/kankakee-illinois-woman-arrested-after-alleged-domestic-attack-attempted-murder-and-garage-fire-on-north-greenwood-avenue/)** > > Kankakee, IL - A Kankakee woman is facing multiple felony charges after police say a violent domestic confrontation Tuesday morning escalated into an > Authorities said when the victim did not answer the door, Hill allegedly forced entry into the residence. > > According to police, Hill allegedly discovered the victim inside with another woman, which allegedly led to a physical altercation. During the confrontation, investigators say Hill allegedly caused significant damage inside the residence, including breaking windows. > > Police further allege Hill poured lighter fluid on the victim and allegedly attempted to set him on fire. The victim was reportedly able to escape the residence and fled to a nearby relative’s home to seek safety. > **[Kankakee Woman Arrested for Alleged Arson Attack - Kankakee Today](https://nationaltoday.com/us/il/kankakee/news/2026/04/01/kankakee-woman-arrested-for-alleged-arson-attack/)** > > Kankakee police have arrested 24-year-old Nazhai S. Hill for allegedly setting a fire that caused significant damage to a residence, detached garage, and three vehicles in the city's North Greenwood Avenue neighborhood. The Kankakee Fire Department... > Kankakee police have arrested 24-year-old Nazhai S. Hill for allegedly setting a fire that caused significant damage to a residence, detached garage, and three vehicles in the city’s North Greenwood Avenue neighborhood. The Kankakee Fire Department responded to the blaze around 11 a.m. on Tuesday and were able to quickly extinguish the flames, but not before the fire caused an estimated $70,000 in total property losses. > **[Kankakee City Police Make Arson Arrest](https://wvli927.com/2026/04/01/kankakee-city-police-make-arson-arrest/)** > > Kankakee City Police have made an arrest in connection to Tuesday morning's alleged arson of a home on North G... > Hill has been charged with attempted murder, arson, and home invasion. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4153 "2026-04-02T16:55:00Z")
Woman convicted of fatally poisoning husband with antifreeze, asked him “Are you having fun?” after he became symptomatic. [https://people.com/woman-fatally-poisoned-boyfriends-sports-drink-convicted-murder-11938324](https://people.com/woman-fatally-poisoned-boyfriends-sports-drink-convicted-murder-11938324) But she’s not as evil as this woman. > **[Woman sentenced in 2nd husband's poisoning](https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna29535515)** > > An upstate New York woman was sentenced Thursday to more than 50 years in prison for poisoning her husband with antifreeze and then trying to kill her daughter and frame her as the murderer. In 2013 manufacturers agreed to add a bittering agent to antifreeze so it couldn’t be disguised in drinks, so it’s unclear how the victim in the first described case didn’t realize the Powerade was spiked. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4154 "2026-04-02T17:03:36Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > But she’s not as evil as this woman. That woman’s story was an episode of Forensic Files. She wound up getting caught because, in the forged suicide note/confession she wrote in her daughter’s name, she misspelled antifreeze as “antifree”, which was the same way she pronounced it during police interviews. So she’s an evil MFer AND a stupid MFer. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4155 "2026-04-02T17:12:29Z")
I admire (not really) the chutzpah of trying to frame someone for a murder you did and then killing them too. So the cops have a nice tidy pre-solved case to deal with. Here’s more on that sordid tale: **[Stacey Castor - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stacey_Castor)**. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4156 "2026-04-02T17:44:31Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > In 2013 manufacturers agreed to add a bittering agent to antifreeze so it couldn’t be disguised in drinks, so it’s unclear how the victim in the first described case didn’t realize the Powerade was spiked. From your link these murders took place in 2005 and 2007. ---
**Author:** ![Pleonast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pleonast/32/1183_2.png) [@Pleonast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pleonast)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4157 "2026-04-02T17:49:03Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > > [@Jackmannii](#): > > > > In 2013 manufacturers agreed to add a bittering agent to antifreeze so it couldn’t be disguised in drinks, so it’s unclear how the victim in the first described case didn’t realize the Powerade was spiked. > > From your link these murders took place in 2005 and 2007.   Time travelers are tricky. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4158 "2026-04-02T18:08:08Z")
Psst, I already said that back in post #4220. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4159 "2026-04-02T18:41:07Z")
The murder committed by Church (first-cited case) occurred in 2022. > [@Jackmanii](#): > > In 2013 manufacturers agreed to add a bittering agent to antifreeze so it couldn’t be disguised in drinks, so it’s unclear how the victim in the first described case didn’t realize the Powerade was spiked. No time-traveling required. ---
**Author:** ![Stratocaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stratocaster/32/16393_2.png) [@Stratocaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stratocaster)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4160 "2026-04-02T18:42:07Z")
I guess those sports drinks taste like shit to begin with. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4161 "2026-04-02T18:49:11Z")
They taste a lot better when you’re actually thirsty, in my past experience. Not sure of the mechanics of that. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4162 "2026-04-02T19:03:03Z")
If it had been Gatorade she would never have been caught. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4163 "2026-04-02T21:43:57Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > They taste a lot better when you’re actually thirsty, in my past experience. Not sure of the mechanics of that. It’s because they have a lot of salt, I think. You lose salt when you sweat, so your body craves it. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4164 "2026-04-02T21:49:54Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > You lose salt when you sweat, so your body craves it. “It’s got electrolytes. It’s got what plants crave!” [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GFD2ggNxR1g/hqdefault.jpg "Idiocracy - Brawndo : It's got what plants crave!") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFD2ggNxR1g) ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2026, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496/4165 "2026-04-02T21:50:39Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > “It’s got electrolytes. It’s got what plants crave!” Dammit, you beat me to the Brawndo reference! I was going to say, “Brawndo, the internal organ mutilator!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496.md?page=207) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-evil-mfers-in-the-news-thread/983496.md?page=209)