# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 31, 2021, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945 "2021-01-31T21:25:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 104
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2070 "2021-12-22T02:34:42Z")
A convicted arsonist has been named the fire chief of a district in Illinois. Ten of the 13 firefighters quit on the spot. > **[Man once convicted of arson named acting chief of Metro East fire department](https://fox2now.com/news/illinois/previously-convicted-arsonist-named-acting-fire-chief-of-metro-east-volunteer-fire-department/)** > > There were high emotions and high drama at the fire district board meeting in East Carondelet on Monday, as a former arsonist was named Acting Fire Chief of the Prairie Du Pont Volunteer Fire Depar… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2071 "2021-12-22T09:49:53Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > A convicted arsonist has been named the fire chief of a district in Illinois. Ten of the 13 firefighters quit on the spot. “Board members say they have good reasons for making the change but they have not made those reasons public.” It’s like you can _see_ them making air quotes. ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2072 "2021-12-22T10:47:59Z")
Sounds like something out of a Terry Pratchett novel. That would be The Guild of Arsonists. ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2073 "2021-12-22T12:10:47Z")
“Nice town here. Shame if something happened to it.” ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2074 "2021-12-22T14:10:44Z")
In other news, the fox _has_ accepted the coveted leadership role in the hen house oversight. The fox was quoted as saying, “I look forward to working closely with the hens, and both developing _and_ nurturing a mutually-beneficial long-term relationship.” After which, the fox loudly belched. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2075 "2021-12-22T14:52:03Z")
“I’m really fired up about this position!” ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2021, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2076 "2021-12-22T23:59:39Z")
Does it feel fiery tonight? ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2077 "2021-12-23T03:34:50Z")
Sure, Elon Musk can sometimes be /Merklin Muffley/ a little…funny, in the head /MF/, but he might’ve outdone himself here (or someone from the design team; regardless, EM’s final stamp of approval would have to go on it, I’d imagine) with the killer awesome new [“Passenger Play” car video game.](https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/u-s-probes-tesla-drivers-playing-video-games-while-on-the-road) Rad. > [@](#): > > The U.S. has opened a formal investigation into the potential for Tesla drivers to play video games on a center touch screen while the vehicle is in motion. In a document posted Wednesday on its website, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration says the feature, called “Passenger Play,” may distract the driver and increase the risk of a crash. Goodness grief! What’ll they come up with next?!?! [Best not consult Mr. PJ O’Rourke.](https://www.heretical.com/miscella/reptile.html) ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2021, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2078 "2021-12-23T07:16:13Z")
Minesweeper, but when you hit the wrong square, your car explodes. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2079 "2021-12-28T19:36:03Z")
Here, it’s not the news but those reporting the news. I understand that I may be the only one who is bothered by this kind of thing. [https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/woodsman-hunting-for-deer-antlers-solves-mma-fighter-s-mystery-disappearance/ar-AASd8Dc](https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/woodsman-hunting-for-deer-antlers-solves-mma-fighter-s-mystery-disappearance/ar-AASd8Dc) First, the guy did not solve any mystery. He just found human remains. Lots of mystery left. > Police said that though they had yet to determine a cause of death, it did not seem that Koenig had died by any trauma or foul play. It did not seem. That is a far cry from a determination. Still could be foul play. > “He was not shot, stabbed, no broken bones of any sort,” Tracy Koenig wrote to the Facebook group on Monday. “He wasn’t robbed, as his tattered wallet was still in tact as well as the two silver necklaces he always wor[e] amongst some other things. All the rumors were FALSE! Nobody killed Dave. Nobody! Totally unfounded. Lots of people have been shot and\or stabbed without any damage to bones. He may have died from natural causes. He could also have died from suicide or homicide. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2080 "2021-12-28T20:17:21Z")
Your last quote was from the mother, not a reporter, and was noted as such in the article. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2081 "2021-12-28T20:54:12Z")
> **[Irate mom allegedly hits Apple Store employee with toy, kicks iPad across...](https://www.arlnow.com/2021/12/28/irate-mom-allegedly-hits-apple-store-employee-with-toy-kicks-ipad-across-floor/)** > > A woman with kids in tow reportedly became enraged by unsatisfactory service at the Pentagon City Apple Store yesterday, leading her to assault an employee, kick an iPad and steal a phone. The wild scene played out around 4:30 p.m. at Apple's busy... > “Upon arrival, it was determined that the female suspect allegedly became irate after being refused service by store management and began to act disorderly,” said an Arlington County Police Department crime report today. “The suspect allegedly struck the employee with a plastic toy firearm, knocked a tablet out of his hands and kicked it across the store, then stole a cell phone and accessories from them.” > The incident was classified as a robbery due to the items that were allegedly taken by force. [That location requires masks;](https://www.apple.com/retail/pentagoncity/) I’m guessing she wasn’t wearing one. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2082 "2021-12-28T22:41:56Z")
Can Amazon Alexa be a stuipd MFer? Certainly a sadist. Alexa allegedly told a kid to see what happens when a coin, to be held by kid, touches live electric conductors. “Amazon has updated its Alexa voice assistant after it “challenged” a 10-year-old girl to touch a coin to the prongs of a half-inserted plug. The suggestion came after the girl asked Alexa for a “challenge to do”. “Plug in a phone charger about halfway into a wall outlet, then touch a penny to the exposed prongs,” the smart speaker said. Amazon said it fixed the error as soon as the company became aware of it.” Fuckin’ A Amazon! > **[Alexa tells 10-year-old girl to touch live plug with penny](https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-59810383)** > > Amazon has fixed its voice assistant so that it will not suggest the dangerous “challenge” again. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2083 "2021-12-28T22:55:41Z")
Thank you, Jeff Bezos, for culling the herd. I bet some dimbulb adults got caught with that “challenge”. Ok, Amazon had to “fix” that one, but that leaves a couple hundred _“Are you dumb enough to do THIS…?”_ ideas still in Alexa’s “Darwinesque Databanks”. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2084 "2021-12-28T23:04:08Z")
> [@bobot](#): > > “Plug in a phone charger about halfway into a wall outlet, then touch a penny to the exposed prongs,” Battle of the tech giants. Bezos is trying to fry the circuits on Gates’ microchips. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2085 "2021-12-28T23:10:11Z")
I mean, it was a 10 year old kid. (Who didn’t do it.) But like, does Darwin enter the scenario with a 10 year old? ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2086 "2021-12-28T23:13:12Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > Your last quote was from the mother, not a reporter, and was noted as such in the article. Yes, but they decided to include it in the article. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2087 "2021-12-28T23:15:53Z")
The article doesn’t identify the suspect but I wouldn’t be surprised if her first name starts with a K. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2088 "2021-12-28T23:19:27Z")
It took me a minute to get that. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2021, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/2089 "2021-12-28T23:48:50Z")
That doesn’t make it reportage of the event, that only makes it reportage of what she said. Surely you can see the difference between using the quote of a mother to show her reaction, and using someone’s quote as evidence of what happened? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=103) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=105)