# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 31, 2021, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945 "2021-01-31T21:25:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 291
**Author:** ![scudsucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scudsucker/32/14101_2.png) [@scudsucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scudsucker)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5811 "2023-01-11T20:58:59Z")
Again, not being an amateur murderer, my understanding is the loss of blood pressure causes the victim to collapse and then bleed out. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5812 "2023-01-11T21:01:16Z")
Well, I can personally attest that I have never murdered anyone by slitting their throat. ---
**Author:** ![Dandan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@Dandan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dandan)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5813 "2023-01-11T21:04:39Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > most effective if you would cut the carotid artery, just under the left ear. That’s O K for you right-handers. Dan ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5814 "2023-01-11T21:05:51Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > Well, I can personally attest that I have never murdered anyone by slitting their throat. - That leaves _so_ many methods. ---
**Author:** ![Sinaptics](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Sinaptics](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinaptics)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5815 "2023-01-11T21:17:26Z")
I was under the impression from extensive movie watching and reading that if the opportunity presents itself, stabbing someone in the back of the neck between the 2nd and 3rd vertebrae thus severing the spinal cord, brain stem, or both (not clear on this) was the way to go. Instant incapacitation and probably much less blood. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5816 "2023-01-11T21:37:07Z")
I watch a lot of Dateline. There are way easier and less messy ways to commit murder. Everyday household products. I won’t share which ones, just in case, ya know. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5817 "2023-01-11T21:51:24Z")
[Wilkes](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0911542/?ref_=tt_ch): [_points his knife at the back of the skull_] At the base of his skull at the right of his spine - what the Chinese call the wind gate - you insert, scramble the brains… what you have is instant rag doll. ---
**Author:** ![Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kolak_of_twilo/32/73_2.png) [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolak_of_Twilo)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5818 "2023-01-11T22:10:59Z")
I don’t remember where I read it (maybe Hammett?) but I seem to recall a story where an assassin would use an ice pick that had been filed down to do exactly what you and @Sinaptics refer to. The explanation was it doesn’t leave a lot of blood at the scene and the wound is rather small and may be overlooked. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5819 "2023-01-11T22:14:59Z")
Not available in a culture at a medieval level of technology, even with the help of the gods (who apparently are very real). I should have mentioned that bit, I suppose. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5820 "2023-01-11T22:15:57Z")
> [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](#): > > I don’t remember where I read it (maybe Hammett?) but I seem to recall a story where an assassin would use an ice pick He got Polonius, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, but I don’t think any were with an ice pick. ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5821 "2023-01-11T22:17:54Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > He got Polonius, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, but I don’t think any were with an ice pick. I know Polonius was stabbed through the arras. We all know how painful that can be. ---
**Author:** ![Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kolak_of_twilo/32/73_2.png) [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolak_of_Twilo)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5822 "2023-01-11T22:21:18Z")
_ **Whoosh** _ ---
**Author:** ![Sinaptics](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Sinaptics](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinaptics)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5823 "2023-01-11T22:22:46Z")
Looked like an icepick when they did it in Goodfellas.[https://youtu.be/sGr2jv4GieM](https://youtu.be/sGr2jv4GieM) ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5824 "2023-01-11T22:28:06Z")
Surely, the quickest knife death would be to just lop the whole head off? Granted, it requires a really strong blow. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5825 "2023-01-11T22:31:12Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Why not the right ear? Asking for a friend. Partly because that’s not where it’s located. But mostly because the Star Trek quote includes “left ear”. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5826 "2023-01-11T22:36:47Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Surely, the quickest knife death would be to just lop the whole head off? But maybe there’s still brain activity for a second or two post-lop. How about touching a pair of low-resistance knives to each side of someone’s head to electrocute them with massive current? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5827 "2023-01-11T22:50:40Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Why not the right ear? Asking for a friend. _whoosh_ > [@Dandan](#): > > That’s O K for you right-handers. _whoosh_ > [@Yllaria](#): > > But mostly because the Star Trek quote includes “left ear”. _ding ding ding ding ding_ ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5828 "2023-01-11T22:50:54Z")
I have to correct myself. The poison did not take a couple of hours to go into effect (at least not in the book, that might have been in the original tweet). It took about 5 minutes from ingestion to death, but the victim was able to speak during some of that time. And it was fugu. Made from the liver of blowfish. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5829 "2023-01-11T22:52:38Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Why not the right ear? Asking for a friend. Does your friend do “work”? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2023, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5830 "2023-01-11T22:53:54Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > > [@running\_coach](#): > > > > Why not the right ear? Asking for a friend. > > Does your friend do “work”? - If I ask him, he’ll have to kill me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=290) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=292)