# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 31, 2021, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945 "2021-01-31T21:25:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 298
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5951 "2023-01-15T20:09:36Z")
FEMA fires the California company hired to translate their information into Native Alaskan languages which translated the documents into unintelligible gibberish, and into a language from Northern Canada, nowhere near Alaska. > **[‘Your Husband Is a Polar Bear, Skinny’ Leads to Firing of FEMA Contractor](https://gvwire.com/2023/01/13/your-husband-is-a-polar-bear-skinny-leads-to-firing-of-fema-contractor/)** > > Share with friends ANCHORAGE, Alaska — After tidal surges and high winds from the remnants of a rare typhoon caused extensive damage to homes along Alaska’s western coast in September, the U.S. government stepped in to help residents — largely Alaska... ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5952 "2023-01-15T20:23:43Z")
Female cop has sex with six different colleagues, husband stands by her. > **[Husband of Tennessee cop-gone-wild Maegan Hall sticks by his wife](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11632291/Husband-Tennessee-cop-gone-wild-Maegan-Hall-sticks-wife.html)** > > DailyMail.com can reveal Jedidiah Hall, 28, is standing by wife Maegan, 26, after the La Vergne police officer was fired for engaging in sexual relationships with multiple cops. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5953 "2023-01-15T20:30:30Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > California company hired to translate their information into Native Alaskan languages which translated the documents into unintelligible gibberish, and into a language from Northern Canada, nowhere near Alaska And padded the word count with passages from an 80 year old study. I wonder if anyone’s hovercraft was filled with eels. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5954 "2023-01-15T20:47:57Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > > [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > > > The world is already becoming the Marching Morons, we don’t need celebrities encouraging it. > > Or lazy programmers encouraging it, for that matter. Yeah… Don’t normalize ignorance as an adorable quirk. (Another thing that gets me, is that NO folk cosmology she would be likely exposed to, says they’re the same thing. Young Earth Creationists say they’re different things. Ptolemaic geocentric cosmology says they’re different things. Most major mythologies say they’re different things. IIRC even Flat Earthers say they’re different things.) ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5955 "2023-01-15T23:17:05Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Yeah… Don’t normalize ignorance as an adorable quirk. Wait, does that mean I should not be a Republican? ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2023, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5956 "2023-01-15T23:45:54Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > Female cop has sex with six different colleagues, husband stands by her. Or does he? > **[Husband of Tennessee cop fired for wild sexual escapades might not have been...](https://www.foxnews.com/us/husband-tennessee-cop-fired-wild-sexual-escapades-not-board-swinger-lifestyle)** > > The husband of former Tennessee police Officer Maegan Hall may not have been supportive of his wife's sexual escapades with colleagues despite claims they had an "open marriage." ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5957 "2023-01-16T03:53:11Z")
A guy was arrested when security found uranium in a package he shipped to Heathrow airport. > **[Man in his 60s arrested over uranium found at Heathrow Airport](https://news.sky.com/story/man-arrested-as-part-of-investigation-into-traces-of-uranium-found-at-heathrow-airport-12787581)** > > Border Force officers at Heathrow Airport seized material contaminated with a small amount of uranium in December, and counter-terrorism police are investigating. Officers made an arrest in Cheshire on Saturday and gave more details of the alleged... ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5958 "2023-01-16T03:59:54Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > I wonder if anyone’s hovercraft was filled with eels. That’s probably how they got caught, the behavior of Alaskan eels is not like the European species that commonly nest and lay their eggs in hovercraft. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5959 "2023-01-16T04:30:03Z")
I think you’ve got it! (Alaskan eels get into harness and pair up in front of a hovercraft, and tow it over the tundra.) ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5960 "2023-01-16T18:24:54Z")
So “eel mush” isn’t just a London delicacy. ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5961 "2023-01-16T20:45:47Z")
Obituary for murderer talks about how much he loved the family he killed > **[Bizarre obituary praises Utah dad Michael Haight, who killed wife, five kids](https://nypost.com/2023/01/16/obit-praises-utah-dad-michael-haight-who-killed-wife-5-kids/)** > > A glowing obituary for a Utah man who is suspected of killing his entire family in a murder-suicide plot said he “made it a point to spend quality time with each and every one of his children”… > Michael made it a point to spend quality time with each and every one of his children. Michael enjoyed making memories with the family. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5962 "2023-01-16T20:50:33Z")
> [@Andy\_L](#): > > Michael enjoyed making memories with the family. “Do you remember when dad killed us all?” “I sure do!” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5963 "2023-01-16T20:51:54Z")
What… the… fuck? It’s not even as though it isolates good parts of his life before he turned into an enraged killer. How can you read this generalization and not feel nauseous? > Michael excelled at everything he did Is there a subtext here that his fuckwit family actually _blame_ the victims, because she wasn’t a sufficiently subservient wife or some horseshit? ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5964 "2023-01-16T21:00:50Z")
I’m afraid so. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5965 "2023-01-16T21:48:43Z")
Sounds like his parents created an asshole killing machine, and they’re quite proud of that fact. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2023, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5966 "2023-01-16T21:50:07Z")
…Shall Not Be Infringed Aaaaargh! [![](https://media.nbcchicago.com/2023/01/toddler-with-gun-3.png?resize=1200%2C675&quality=85&strip=all) ](https://media.nbcchicago.com/2023/01/toddler-with-gun-3.png?resize=1200%2C675&quality=85&strip=all) > **[Indiana Father Arrested After Toddler Seen With Gun on Live TV: Report](https://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/indiana-father-arrested-after-toddler-seen-with-gun-on-live-tv-report/3046552/)** > > A father in central Indiana has been accused of child neglect after his toddler somehow got ahold of a loaded gun and waved the weapon around at an apartment complex, according to WTHR, the NBC affiliate in Indianapolis. “Footage from a neighbor’s security camera showed the toddler holding the loaded pistol in the hallway of the complex, and even, at one point, pulling the trigger.” ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2023, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5967 "2023-01-17T01:11:53Z")
And the wife’s family were saying that the father/husband took all of the guns out of the house, and if the wife and kids had had their guns, they could have saved themselves. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2023, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5968 "2023-01-17T01:36:56Z")
Clearly what we need is guns. Some guns. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2023, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5969 "2023-01-17T01:37:37Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > and if the wife and kids had had their guns, they could have saved themselves _but, hey, please fail to make it political_ ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2023, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/5970 "2023-01-17T02:04:56Z")
This could be posted here, or in the guns thread, or the evil Republicans thread. > **[Former Republican candidate arrested in shootings targeting Democratic...](https://www.abqjournal.com/2565117/solomon-pena-arrested-in-shootings-targeting-new-mexico-democratic-politicians-homes.html)** > > The Albuquerque Police Department has arrested Solomon Pena, an unsuccessful Republican candidate for the House District 14 seat in the South Valley, in connection with the shootings at local Democratic politicians’ homes, the police chief announced... [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=297) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=299)