# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 31, 2021, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945 "2021-01-31T21:25:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 95
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1890 "2021-12-03T15:38:49Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > My Mother-in-law is getting knee replacement today. Last night, she took a sharpie, and wrote “This knee” on one knee and “NO!” on the other. This is pretty standard operating (ha!) procedure these days. You and your doctor sign the body part being worked on. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1891 "2021-12-03T15:38:57Z")
> [@susan](#): > > …I wanted to write “this uterus --\>” on a friend, but she wouldn’t let me. You could just write “not this uterus—\>” on everyone else. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1892 "2021-12-03T16:16:12Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > This is pretty standard operating (ha!) procedure these days. You and your doctor sign the body part being worked on. Yup. Did that with my shoulder and hip. Damn I’m old. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1893 "2021-12-03T16:16:16Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > > [@eschereal](#): > > > > Chri **stains** > > My bold - typo or slur? I like it as a slur for non-Christ-like Christians (the majority, it often appears (at least the right-wing ones)). Almost everybody has auto-correct these days, so typos should be assumed somewhat unlikely. On the other hand, it learns frequently used words, so I can start CFEFWSG or jehovallah and it will autocomplete them for me. My mistakes are occasionally not but mostly are deliberate. ---
**Author:** ![PackerMan2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/packerman2/32/2894_2.png) [@PackerMan2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PackerMan2)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1894 "2021-12-03T16:29:10Z")
It’s fricking freezing in here Mr. Bigglesworth. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/KHYEthYTMhM/hqdefault.jpg "Dr. Evil: It's Frickin Freezing In Here") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHYEthYTMhM) ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1895 "2021-12-03T16:34:17Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > My Mother-in-law is getting knee replacement today. Last night, she took a sharpie, and wrote “This knee” on one knee and “NO!” on the other. “This is the knee we’re going to operate on. It says “ON” right there.” > [@Telemark](#): > > This is pretty standard operating (ha!) procedure these days. You and your doctor sign the body part being worked on. Has anyone ever developed post-op complications from an incision contaminated with Sharpie ink? ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1896 "2021-12-03T16:44:49Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > Has anyone ever developed post-op complications from an incision contaminated with Sharpie ink? Don’t take the chance! Get a tattoo! ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1897 "2021-12-03T16:55:35Z")
Actually, there are [specialized](https://www.cardinalhealth.com/en/product-solutions/medical/surgical/or-accessories/devon-surgical-markers/devon-surgical-skin-markers.html) [pens](https://www.aspensurgical.com/catalog/patient-staff-safety/patient-identification-marking-pens/richard-allan-securline-and-writesite-surgical-marking-pens/) for use in marking the surgical site. There’s also a whole process where the doctor visits the patient pre-surgery, introduces themselves, and confirms via multiple identifiers (name, birthdate, etc) that they are speaking to the right person. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1898 "2021-12-03T17:04:11Z")
Sh also dissuaded me from drawing two arrows and writing “these breasts” on my sternum. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1899 "2021-12-03T17:15:01Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > Did that with my shoulder and hip. But that doesn’t eliminate the risk of the surgeon putting the hip replacement in your shoulder. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1900 "2021-12-03T17:31:45Z")
> [@Guest-starring\_Id](#): > > Or maybe this is derper - I give up. > And a little on the slap-wristy side, methinks. > > [Surgeon who amputated the wrong leg of an elderly patient fined less than $3,100 - Yahoo News Canada](https://ca.yahoo.com/news/surgeon-amputated-wrong-leg-elderly-180516119.html) The article says > [@](#): > > The surgeon said she realized the mistake two days after the surgery _Two freaking days_? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1901 "2021-12-03T17:33:27Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > _Two freaking days_ ? How long does it take _you_ to sober up after a bender? ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1902 "2021-12-03T17:42:42Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > that doesn’t eliminate the risk of the surgeon putting the hip replacement in your shoulder. I know this isn’t a firearms thread, but ISTM this would make shooting from the hip significantly more common. ---
**Author:** ![SunUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SunUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunUp)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1903 "2021-12-03T18:25:20Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > “This is the knee we’re going to operate on. It says “ON” right there.” Hence the exclamation point. “Has this knee been iONized in some way? Is there some kind of chemistry thing we need to do first?” ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1904 "2021-12-03T18:55:29Z")
> [@SunUp](#): > > Hence the exclamation point. Was the surgeon Spanish? ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1905 "2021-12-03T20:48:15Z")
I had cataract surgery a few weeks ago and they put a spot over the eye and then a big x on the eyebrow. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1906 "2021-12-03T20:49:26Z")
17 year old high school player arrested after he punched a player from the other team in the handshake line after the game and knocked him unconscious. > **[High school basketball player arrested after sucker punching opponent in...](https://www.sbnation.com/2021/12/2/22814559/high-school-basketball-player-arrested-sucker-punching-opponent-handshake-line)** > > The 17-year-old was charged with "willful injury." ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1907 "2021-12-03T20:54:29Z")
Munitions experts called to an English hospital after a patient was admitted with a world war II mortar up his butt. He tripped and fell on it. Yeah, right. > **[Bomb squad called to A&E after mortar pulled from man's rear](https://www.gloucestershirelive.co.uk/news/gloucester-news/bomb-squad-called-gloucestershire-royal-6298076)** > > Unfortunate trip sees man at centre of bomb drama ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1908 "2021-12-03T21:00:02Z")
Spoiler: . He’d been walking around with it up his butt since 1944! . And now you know…the rest of the story. Page two! ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1909 "2021-12-03T21:14:51Z")
People trip and fall on hard, throbbing cylinders with their anuses way more often than you think. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=94) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=96)