# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 31, 2021, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945 "2021-01-31T21:25:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 96
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1910 "2021-12-03T21:21:44Z")
“One in a million, Doc! One in a million!” ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1911 "2021-12-03T21:26:39Z")
Everybody knows that million to one shots happen nine times out of ten. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1912 "2021-12-03T23:24:36Z")
So, you’ve had huge antique bombs up there nine times? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2021, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1913 "2021-12-03T23:27:47Z")
Doesn’t this sort of accident require that the guy wasn’t wearing pants or trousers at the time? Or did it just tear through the fabric? And the other thing I don’t get is that dildos and similar toys are easily and commonly available, often with a flared end to ease removal. So why risk it? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1914 "2021-12-04T00:44:24Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > Munitions experts called to an English hospital after a patient was admitted with a world war II mortar up his butt. He tripped and fell on it. Yeah, right. - Likely story. He was cheating on the bazooka. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1915 "2021-12-04T00:46:32Z")
This is what comes of jurisdictions that forbid open carry. Ahem. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1916 "2021-12-04T00:49:46Z")
He was quoted as saying, “Shell I compare thee to a summer’s day … ?” ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1917 "2021-12-04T01:07:51Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > Munitions experts called to an English hospital after a patient was admitted with a world war II mortar up his butt. I believe in England that is referred to as arsetillery. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1918 "2021-12-04T01:43:25Z")
:golf clap: ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1919 "2021-12-04T02:20:30Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > I believe in England that is referred to as arsetillery. You can find these at the arsenal. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1920 "2021-12-04T04:15:21Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > Doesn’t this sort of accident require that the guy wasn’t wearing pants or trousers at the time? Or did it just tear through the fabric? Maybe he’s one of those people who wears his butt on the outside? ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1921 "2021-12-04T04:18:56Z")
This almost doesn’t make sense. Once they get it out (without detonating), the major danger has passed. What’s the point of calling the bomb squad then? They really needed to call the bomb squad first. Did they not know it was an artillery shell until after they extracted it? If they had called the bomb squad first, would the bomb squad have just carted the guy off to an isolated location and detonated him? (As bomb squads typically do when they’re called to deal with someone with a bomb up the butt.) ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1922 "2021-12-04T04:59:34Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > If they had called the bomb squad first, would the bomb squad have just carted the guy off to an isolated location and detonated him? That’s risky; the bomb could be triggered by the slightest movement. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1923 "2021-12-04T05:04:25Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > That’s risky; the bomb could be triggered by the slightest movement.   That’s no doubt why he’s been holding it for the last 70-some years. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1924 "2021-12-04T06:27:58Z")
“We sent a team out to defuse the bomb, but there was a terrible tragedy” “OMG-What happened? Did it explode?” “No-The guy farted, and two members of the squad died of a heart attack” ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1925 "2021-12-04T10:58:34Z")
Inside Edition reports that MI school shooter Ethan Crumbley posted to social media the day before the shooting, saying “Now I am become Death, destroyer of worlds” - which is, of course, a line from the Bhagavad Gita that Robert Oppenheimer quoted as he was watching the first ever nuclear explosion in the New Mexico desert in 1945. They reported that it was a quote from Fallout 4, a video game released in 2015. > [@](#): > > One post from Crumbley says, “Now I Am Become Death, The Destroyer of Worlds. See You Tomorrow Oxford.” The same words can be found in a gory video game. > **[Teen School Shooting Suspect Posted Disturbing Messages: Prosecutors](https://www.insideedition.com/15-year-old-school-shooting-suspect-ethan-crumbley-wrote-disturbing-posts-online-prosecutors-say)** > > “I would characterize a lot of the stuff we've now seen as dark and as cold-blooded,” Sheriff Michael Bouchard told Inside Edition. [https://twitter.com/Liv\_Agar/status/1466987906149625858](https://twitter.com/Liv_Agar/status/1466987906149625858) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1926 "2021-12-04T11:07:06Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > This almost doesn’t make sense. Once they get it out (without detonating), the major danger has passed. What’s the point of calling the bomb squad then? They really needed to call the bomb squad first. > > Did they not know it was an artillery shell until after they extracted it? - They likely never dreamed it was a live round. You can buy all kinds of replica ammunition of that sort. > **[Replica Artillery & Fuzes - Inert Products LLC](https://inertproducts.com/product-category/replica-ordnance/artillery-replica-ordnance/)** > > Our inert ordnance training aids are designed to be highly detailed yet extremely durable, allowing for effective training from the classroom to the battlefield. Inert Products manufactures and distributes the largest assortment of replica and inert... ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1927 "2021-12-04T16:00:27Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > hey reported that it was a quote from Fallout 4, a video game released in 2015. Well, I’m sure the shooter never read the BG or knows who Oppenheimer was (or what an atom bomb is, probably). So for him, it IS from Fallout 4. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1928 "2021-12-04T16:02:43Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > They reported that it was a quote from Fallout 4, a video game released in 2015. TBF that’s probably where Master Crumbley got it from. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2021, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945/1929 "2021-12-04T16:05:41Z")
I doubt anybody involved with the story has read _The Destroyer_ series by Sapir & Murphy. That line is the mantra of Remo Williams: “I am created Shiva, the Destroyer. Death, the shatterer of worlds. The dead night tiger made whole by Sinanju. Who is this dog meat that challenges me?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=95) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-1/931945.md?page=97)