# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2024, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657 "2024-01-05T16:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 360
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7181 "2026-05-12T06:12:02Z")
Or maybe their artificiality would mean they now have the sensitivity of coconut shells such that you would only hurt your foot? Maybe he now actually has steel balls? ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7182 "2026-05-12T06:49:08Z")
The subreddit that the article mentions (not gonna name it here) is full of NSFW pics of men showing off their inflated packages. It’s painful just to LOOK at. Don’t go there if you’re of weak constitution. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7183 "2026-05-12T06:54:19Z")
I’m good, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7184 "2026-05-12T07:07:14Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Maybe he now actually has steel balls? Maybe he’s Iron Balls McGinty. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7185 "2026-05-12T13:01:00Z")
🎶_My name is Tom Taylor_ _My dick is a whaler_ _My balls they weigh forty-nine pounds…_ 🎶 ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7186 "2026-05-12T13:48:15Z")
I knew of a guy, worked with a friend of mine, that very noticeably, even through his office clothes, had ginormous balls. All his female coworkers marveled. Turns out he wasn’t a fetishist, but had untreated testicular cancer. He said he “would rather die than have chemo.” So he did. ---
**Author:** ![Capn\_Carl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/838e76/32.png) [@Capn\_Carl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capn_Carl)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7187 "2026-05-12T15:03:58Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > All his female coworkers marveled. I find this hard to believe. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7188 "2026-05-12T15:11:14Z")
Why not? That’s a natural reaction Not like the claim was interested or impressed ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7189 "2026-05-12T15:11:35Z")
Why? 1. Enlarged testicles is a common consequence of testicular cancer. 2. Some people would rather die than have chemo. I’ve worked with several, and they died. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7190 "2026-05-12T15:20:19Z")
“Better to die with big balls than none at alls.” ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7191 "2026-05-12T15:35:11Z")
Pretty sure the alternative in that phrase should be ‘living with none’ rather than dying either way but you do you ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7192 "2026-05-12T18:14:15Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > > In her plea agreement she admitted to not notifying the attorney general that she was working for the PRC. > > If she had, I’m sure it would have all been fine. Actually, yes. Foreign agents are [required](https://www.justice.gov/nsd-fara) to register with some part of the federal government. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7193 "2026-05-12T18:29:11Z")
> [@Great\_Antibob](#): > > Pretty sure the alternative in that phrase should be ‘living with none’ rather than dying either way but you do you - I didn’t say I agreed, I just thought it needed a catchy slogan. ---
**Author:** ![Stratocaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stratocaster/32/16393_2.png) [@Stratocaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stratocaster)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7194 "2026-05-12T18:32:13Z")
I liked it. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7195 "2026-05-12T19:23:30Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > GameStop, I.e. the video game store you haven’t been to for 15 years because nobody buys physical copies of video games from retail stores anymore, wants to buy eBay for $56 billion (which they don’t have) so they can use their brick-and-mortar video game stores for grading Pokemon cards or something like that, because nothing is real anymore and all of capitalism is just gambling with extra steps. Update: Ebay has responded to the proposal. > Dear Mr. Cohen, > > The Board, with the support of its independent advisors, has thoroughly reviewed your proposal and has determined to reject it. > > We have concluded that your proposal is neither credible nor attractive. > **[eBay Rejects Unsolicited Proposal from GameStop](https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/ebay-rejects-unsolicited-proposal-from-gamestop-302769000.html)** > > /PRNewswire/ -- eBay Inc. (Nasdaq: EBAY), a global commerce leader that connects millions of buyers and sellers around the world, today announced that,... ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7196 "2026-05-12T20:00:28Z")
> [@Capn\_Carl](#): > > > [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > > > All his female coworkers marveled. > > I find this hard to believe. > [@susan](#): > > Why? 1. Enlarged testicles is a common consequence of testicular cancer. 2. Some people would rather die than have chemo. I’ve worked with several, and they died. I believe what the good Cap’n found hard to believe was the quoted part, “All his female co-workers marveled.” I too find that hard to believe. Most men’s trousers these days are just not tight enough that an observer would be able to distinguish between the smallest and largest normal (i.e. untreated and un-diseased) balls. As an example of a similar situation, I used to work with a man who was an asshole, and who coincidentally had to wear a colostomy bag. One other stupid man said “Well, he may be an asshole, but he’s sure well-endowed.” No, stupid man, what you are seeing is not his endowment. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7197 "2026-05-12T20:18:27Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > I believe what the good Cap’n found hard to believe was the quoted part, “All his female co-workers marveled.” I too find that hard to believe. It implies that women would be thrilled by working with a man with visibly protruding testicles. And solely women. I’m calling bullshit. Come on now. The ladies got all titillated by it? That’s the kind of nonsense fantasy that leads to men injecting saline into their testicles because they think women will flock to the them like an Axe body spray commercial over their deformed genitals. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7198 "2026-05-12T20:23:32Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > I’m calling bullshit. Come on now. The ladies got all titillated by it? You call anything you want. It happened. It was my then-gf who was the female coworker. And use your imagination. It wasn’t his testicles they thought was ginormoush. Sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7199 "2026-05-12T20:24:47Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > It was my then-gf who was the female coworker. So “all the female coworkers” was one person? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2026, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7200 "2026-05-12T20:27:26Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > So “all the female coworkers” was one person? Jesus fuck are you being a contrarian for a personal reason, or just don’t like me? She related the story of her female coworker’s reaction. And I’m done with you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=359) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=361)