# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2024, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657 "2024-01-05T16:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 371
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7401 "2026-05-27T02:21:28Z")
It’s a Mauser, not a Schnauzer. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7402 "2026-05-27T07:25:10Z")
“Affenpinscher?” “Affen _shot_ 'er!” ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7403 "2026-05-27T14:42:13Z")
Guns don’t kill people, dogs kill people. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7404 "2026-05-27T15:23:10Z")
Who’s a good boy with a gun? That’s right, _you_ are! You’ll take care of the bad boy with a gun. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7405 "2026-05-27T15:33:32Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > Who’s a good boy with a gun? That’s right, _you_ are! You’ll take care of the bad boy with a gun. - Or a cat with a gat. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7406 "2026-05-27T15:36:37Z")
Parrot with a garrote ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7407 "2026-05-27T15:56:15Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > Parrot with a garrote - Asp with a sap. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7408 "2026-05-27T15:58:39Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Or a cat with a gat. in a hat 🎶 In French; _chat, pistolet_ In Spanish it’s _el gato_ with an _arma_, yo! In German, I’m a _Katze mit einer Waffe!_ ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7409 "2026-05-27T17:01:08Z")
Mugged by a pug thug. [![](https://i.redd.it/zm23ew6j5cu61.jpg) ](https://i.redd.it/zm23ew6j5cu61.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7410 "2026-05-27T17:55:10Z")
_A life without pugs is possible, but useless._ (Loriot aka Vicco von Bülow, German comedian, 1923-2011) ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7411 "2026-05-27T18:25:23Z")
Sez the dog with the mop-like head. I think whatever sort of dog that is would be far superior to pugs. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2026, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7412 "2026-05-27T18:55:19Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > > [@running\_coach](#): > > > > Or a cat with a gat. > > in a hat In a '64 Impala. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7413 "2026-06-03T18:18:51Z")
Not quite sure about this since there isn’t really enough detail in the story. Were they fishing for sharks? Was the kid just being a moron? Both? > **[17-year-old boy trying to pull shark onto boat is bitten off Galveston coast;...](https://www.yahoo.com/news/weather-news/articles/17-old-boy-trying-pull-165500038.html)** > > The boat later lost power as they were trying to return to shore. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7414 "2026-06-03T18:29:24Z")
When I was fifteen, my father took me on his fraternity brother’s boat to troll for Spanish mackerels off the coast of Atlantic Beach, NC. I had a bite and started to reel it in when it got very hard indeed. After struggling for a few minutes, we could see that my mackerel had in turn caught a shark. My father and I started to get it over the side, when his fraternity brother announced there was no way in hell that shark was getting on his boat. The shark then solved our dilemma by biting the fish I’d caught in half. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7415 "2026-06-03T18:35:03Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > Not quite sure about this since there isn’t really enough detail in the story. Were they fishing for sharks? Was the kid just being a moron? Both? FWIW, the local news didn’t really have any more details than that over Memorial Day weekend. Just that they were trying to bring the shark onboard and it bit the kid. It’s possible they were fishing for them. Sharks aren’t uncommon in Galveston Bay. Limit is 1 a day per fisherman. There are several varieties, none known to be especially aggressive towards humans. Bites are uncommon, though. I don’t think there have been more than a dozen or two over the last century ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7416 "2026-06-03T18:46:28Z")
I took note the boat owner / captain did not want the shark brought onboard. Which suggests that while he had some clue, maybe the Dad & bitten kid were clueless non-fishermen. Or maybe just lake fishermen, not familiar with bigger bitier kinds of fish. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7417 "2026-06-03T20:54:34Z")
I presume the boat was too small? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7418 "2026-06-03T22:39:00Z")
> [@Great\_Antibob](#): > > FWIW, the local news didn’t really have any more details than that over Memorial Day weekend. Just that they were trying to bring the shark onboard and it bit the kid. Well, you never know what bait the fish will go for on any given day. I’ll see myself out. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2026, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7419 "2026-06-03T22:47:22Z")
Considering your avatar, I’d say they’re all too small. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2026, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7420 "2026-06-04T04:09:52Z")
> [@Great\_Antibob](#): > > Bites are uncommon, though. I don’t think there have been more than a dozen or two over the last century So the kid got… lucky? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=370) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=372)