# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2024, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657 "2024-01-05T16:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 377
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7521 "2026-06-18T15:36:43Z")
The lit mag at my school (where students can submit poems or artwork or the like to be officially published) is called “Calliope”. It’s always amusing when something about the mag makes it onto the (student-read) morning announcements. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7522 "2026-06-18T15:44:24Z")
Was it named after the muse or the steam powered organ? ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7523 "2026-06-18T15:45:31Z")
[![](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTrxeb5nSmMmIYepc31916pNug7-Zt5q2974w&s) ](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTrxeb5nSmMmIYepc31916pNug7-Zt5q2974w&s) ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7524 "2026-06-18T16:30:10Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Then again, Neil ^%&# Armstrong got a finger severed working on farm machinery (kept his wedding ring on, that got caught, OW! ensues). Of course being Neil ^%&# Armstrong he retrieved it, put it in ice and drove himself to the hospital to have it reattached. I don’t think that’s a matter of Neil Armstrong being a badass but that many of these farms are so far out that you can’t wait for the ambulance to arrive. I think a lot of farmers need to get themselves to the hospital. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7525 "2026-06-18T17:13:13Z")
Harvesting machines? Fingers? Hands? Arms? What about ears? :RaisesOneEyebrow: 🖖 ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7526 "2026-06-18T17:24:49Z")
Fascinating. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7527 "2026-06-18T17:54:38Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > I think my generation wised up. I don’t know anyone personally that is missing fingers. I agree with you. There was a man who attended my parents’ church who was missing an arm, thanks to a silage chopper like the one in this video, but nobody in my generation had an accident like that. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/0CZ4k6AM5wQ/maxresdefault.jpg "New Holland 1880 Self Propelled Forage Harvester chopping corn silage #silageseason") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CZ4k6AM5wQ) ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7528 "2026-06-18T18:04:30Z")
> [@crowmanyclouds](#): > > What about ears? You get your head caught in a, er, mechanical corn picker, and you’ll need more than the services of a missionary who was also a skilled plastic surgeon. You’ll need Kara with a teacher-boosted knowledge. “Head and head! What is head?” > [@Railer13](#): > > a silage chopper like the one in this video Boy that thing moves. I don’t remember being able to harvest that fast with ours. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7529 "2026-06-18T18:10:34Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > Boy that thing moves. I drove one of those for a custom harvester one fall. It had a massive diesel engine that enabled the machine to gobble the cornstalks. And when it got clogged, I always shut off the engine before cleaning it out. I wasn’t taking any chances with it accidentally slipping into gear. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7530 "2026-06-18T18:21:11Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > There was a man who attended my parents’ church who was missing an arm, thanks to a silage chopper like the one in this video, but nobody in my generation had an accident like that. If ever Trump manages to dismantle OSHA like he declared he would, we might start seeing it return! “Make American Dismembered Again!” ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7531 "2026-06-18T18:33:39Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > I wasn’t taking any chances with it accidentally slipping into gear. Especially when you’re by yourself. A neighbor once fell off his tractor (well, probably, no one was around to see) and got run over by a disc. His wife found him, hours later. 40 years on and I still shudder. Farming is dangerous! [![](https://www.tractorforum.com/attachments/20221028_172530-jpg.83038/?auto=webp&fit=bounds&format=pjgp&height=390&optimize=high&width=691) ](https://www.tractorforum.com/attachments/20221028_172530-jpg.83038/?auto=webp&fit=bounds&format=pjgp&height=390&optimize=high&width=691) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7532 "2026-06-18T18:47:31Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > > [@Railer13](#): > > > > There was a man who attended my parents’ church who was missing an arm, thanks to a silage chopper like the one in this video, but nobody in my generation had an accident like that. - > > If ever Trump manages to dismantle OSHA like he declared he would, we might start seeing it return! > > “Make American Dismembered Again!” A Farewell To Arms. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7533 "2026-06-18T19:27:07Z")
Ask not for whom the PTO spins, it spins for thee. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7534 "2026-06-18T19:56:05Z")
My grandfather was missing two fingers and half a thumb from trying to unclog a snowblower, and a toe (middle one, I think) from pushing a lawnmower out of some loose dirt. I don’t know which one happened first. And I grew up in Lakewood. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7535 "2026-06-18T20:05:40Z")
I was going to say that I didn’t know anyone dismembered like that, but yeah, my grandfather was missing a toe from a lawnmower, too. In his case, it was because his house was on a steep hill. After that, he tied a long rope to the lawnmower, stood at the top of the hill, and pulled it up and down from above. ---
**Author:** ![dougrb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/76d3ee/32.png) [@dougrb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougrb)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7536 "2026-06-18T21:32:23Z")
Farmer dogs don’t have it easy either. A friend of mine had a dog chasing a rabit and ran underneath a bale-spear that pierced the skin just behind the head and the dog was “hanging” from the spear by its skin TRYING to get off\*. After that, he started sticking the spears vertically into the ground. \*after emergency visit to the vet he was mostly fine. [![](https://d2qc09rl1gfuof.cloudfront.net/product/CM49YC4000DTT2Z01/hay-bale-spear-m100-6.jpg) ](https://d2qc09rl1gfuof.cloudfront.net/product/CM49YC4000DTT2Z01/hay-bale-spear-m100-6.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7537 "2026-06-18T21:57:37Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I was going to say that I didn’t know anyone dismembered like that, but yeah, my grandfather was missing a toe from a lawnmower, too. In his case, it was because his house was on a steep hill. Back at my first office job, one of my coworkers had this happen to him. He was also mowing the lawn in sandals (think like Birkenstock sandals with a real sole under them). Just a recipe for disaster. It was the big toe on one of his feet. He got a lot of crap from us over it too. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7538 "2026-06-18T23:34:01Z")
Not having an agricultural background, I have no idea what PTO means wrt farming machinery. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7539 "2026-06-18T23:43:18Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > These common clay of the new dairyland couldn’t be bothered to turn off the PTO before unclogging the corn picker. The one-handed farmer was definitely on the right-hand side of the IQ bell curve (most of the missing finger guys, not so much). Fatigue causes mistakes. Standardized testing would suggest I’m fairly bright. During pea harvest, I was hooking up a trailer to a combine. 3 man job: A backing the tractor with a combine already attached, B directing, C dropping the pin to hook up the trailer. I’m C. End of a 12-hour day (well night, it’s dark), every one is tired, I miss twice on the pin cause I can’t see, decide to use my finger to see if everything is lined up. Came _this close_ to amputating it when the tractor jerked just as I pulled my finger away. ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2026, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7540 "2026-06-18T23:49:15Z")
You and me both. As far as I can tell, it’s Power Take-Off (equipment powered by the engine of the tractor or equivalent). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=376) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657.md?page=378)