# Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 2) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2024, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657 "2024-01-05T16:15:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 398
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2026, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7941 "2026-07-26T23:55:53Z")
The purpose of youth missionary work isn’t to convert the heathens. It’s to convert the missionaries. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7942 "2026-07-27T00:18:11Z")
Actually not completely true. The LDS church had a significant number of converts over the years. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7943 "2026-07-27T01:17:44Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Back when I was a Mormon and came on a Mormon mission to Japan, we were instructed to initiate conversations on planes. > > It was as successful as you can imagine. > > Damn, I was stupid when I was young. > [@Chronos](#): > > The purpose of youth missionary work isn’t to convert the heathens. It’s to convert the missionaries. Doesn’t seem to have worked in that case. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7944 "2026-07-27T02:58:08Z")
You may have noticed that Dopers are somewhat atypical. ---
**Author:** ![Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kolak_of_twilo/32/73_2.png) [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolak_of_Twilo)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7945 "2026-07-27T03:23:43Z")
> [@susan](#): > > One may chastise, if one must. Hit me and that’s an assault. Assault can also be a verbal attack, particularly if it threatens violence. Hitting is more likely to end up as battery. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7946 "2026-07-27T12:25:36Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > You may have noticed that Dopers are somewhat atypical. And recent reports suggest that half of LDS missionaries become inactive or actually quit the church within a few years. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7947 "2026-07-27T13:10:11Z")
I was under the (seemingly mistaken) impression that some sort of missionary work was required of al young adult Mormons. Does anyone have a rough idea of what fraction of Mormon young adults perform a mission away from home? ISTM that someone doing one of those missions will have their dedication to the cause either cemented or shredded. Vaguely akin to Amish Rumspringa, the person heading out into the world will get to see the non-Mormon/Amish world as it is, not as their parents taught them it is. Whether they are repulsed or attracted to this new knowledge is individual. ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7948 "2026-07-27T13:26:21Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Does anyone have a rough idea of what fraction of Mormon young adults perform a mission away from home? This article [https://favs.news/ask-a-latter-day-saint-how-many-men-do-missionary-work/](https://favs.news/ask-a-latter-day-saint-how-many-men-do-missionary-work/) says that about a 1/3 of Mormon men do a 2-year stint as missionaries ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7949 "2026-07-27T13:59:00Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > The LDS church had a significant number of converts over the years. Not long after I bought my home (In Mesa, AZ) two well-meaning nice young missionaries came to my door. I told them that my mom had been born Mormon, but “she got better”. (true) I was much more snarky (rude?) in those days. I probably got a rep in the ward, but no one came to the door anymore, either. Later I became friends with the LDS neighbors. I never tried to convert them, though. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7950 "2026-07-27T14:15:47Z")
I’m usually okay with the LDS door knockers. I’ll usually invite them in on the condition that we’re not going to talk about their mission. I’ll usually get them something to drink, and just let them tell me about themselves for a bit. These are usually poor schmucks just out of high school, and getting doors continually slammed in your face has got to do something to your psyche. The Jehovah’s Witnesses can just go all the way to hell. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7951 "2026-07-27T14:26:38Z")
Sometimes they don’t even try to proselytize, at least not in words. I remember one time I was helping a friend move, and there were a couple of young men there helping out, too. I had assumed that they were other friends of his that I just hadn’t met before. Nope, LDS missionaries who were out on their rounds and saw an opportunity to help someone out, and so did. Of course, as far as actual proselytizing goes, spreading the message that LDS are nice people who help others out probably does go a long way. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7952 "2026-07-27T15:35:53Z")
I knew of a pair of JW’s that knocked at the door of a Catholic bishop. House right by the church and labeled as diocesan offices. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7953 "2026-07-27T15:37:19Z")
They may be dedicated, but nobody ever said they were bright. Or literate. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7954 "2026-07-27T15:44:16Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > I knew of a pair of JW’s that knocked at the door of a Catholic bishop. House right by the church and labeled as diocesan offices. I imagine that getting that conversion would earn them extra points back at the Kingdom Hall. Maybe even enough for that HDTV. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7955 "2026-07-27T16:21:45Z")
My dad used to try to convert the JWs. He knew his bible probably better than they did. ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2026, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7956 "2026-07-27T22:37:42Z")
My granddaughter was at a church retreat where the priest who was giving a talk recounted the time he was eating in a food court, but not wearing his collar. Two young men were approaching every table, asking people if they’ve been saved, came to his table. He invited them to sit down, said that yes he has been saved, and quoted several Bible verses to them. One of them said that’s the verses we use too. Then he revealed that he was a priest. They then prayed for each other. ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2026, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7957 "2026-07-28T01:50:39Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > My dad used to try to convert the JWs. He knew his bible probably better than they did. Hehe, yeah. I kind of feel sorry for the JWs and Mormons I’ve ended up talking to. They would approach me while I was outside smoking under my carport, so I couldn’t pretend I was busy doing something, so I’d go ahead and talk with them for awhile. I don’t really know the bible that well, but I was confirmed Presbyterian and got an A in Catholic communicant’s class in jr. high. I always kind of got the feeling that I was doing a better job of talking them out of religion than they were at talking me into one. They were always nice folks, and I don’t think that talking to someone like me was what they signed up for. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2026, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7958 "2026-07-28T16:47:20Z")
A Florida Man doing what we do best: **[“Drill Bits and Wine”: Man Goes to Jail After Chaotic Visit to Pompano Walmart](https://www.tapinto.net/towns/pompano-beach/sections/police-and-fire/articles/drill-bits-and-wine-man-goes-to-jail-after-chaotic-visit-to-pompano-walmart?utm_medium=referral&utm_source=nextdoor.com&utm_campaign=nextdoor_news)**. The article title doesn’t really do it justice. That’s only part of what FM got up to. ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2026, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7959 "2026-07-28T18:09:23Z")
How could they leave “fracas with the shopper and his cooking pot” out of the title!? ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2026, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-stupid-mfers-in-the-news-thread-part-2/995657/7960 "2026-07-28T21:18:52Z")
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