# Omnibus Trolls R Us Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 23, 2016, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489 "2016-05-23T21:38:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 266
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5304 "2017-12-08T12:19:55Z")
See, I’m one of today’s 10,000. It isn’t Kosher salt, it is _Kosherizing_ salt! ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5305 "2017-12-08T12:36:39Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > [Draws out moisture.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kosher_salt) > > Now in this case, it’s being used in a brine. Because kosher salt has larger crystals than table salt, a half cup of kosher has less “salt mass” than table salt. Using table salt in this recipe would make the brine too salty. > No idea why the recipe uses kosher salt rather than a smaller amount of table salt. > A recent _Good Eats_ episode involved roasting duck. Kosher salt was used to dry out the skin before roasting. Makes for a crispier skin. IOW, what you’re calling kosher salt is just what other people call “salt in large crystals”. Still makes it funny. ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5306 "2017-12-08T12:43:04Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > IOW, what you’re calling kosher salt is just what other people call “salt in large crystals”. True. To me, calling it “kosher” smacks of hipster foodie snobbishness (though I admit to a soft spot for that vibe). ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5307 "2017-12-08T13:53:08Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > IOW, what you’re calling kosher salt is just what other people call “salt in large crystals”. But that’s what kosher salt means. It’s not hipster, it’s the standard culinary term. If you really want to get upset about food terms, rise up with me as I take arms against hamburger containing no ham. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5308 "2017-12-08T14:25:04Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > What’s the point of putting kosher salt on ham? I can just hear the little granules screaming as they get sprinkled on… 🙂 OK, that was funny!! ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5309 "2017-12-08T14:26:10Z")
Could we try a little harder not to engage the obvious trolls when they visit the troll thread? I know it’s really difficult, but it ruins my enjoyment of the thread. How about making them their own thread if they are so eager to engage? I’m sure this **Politically Correct arolinus** character would love a separate pit thread where they could insult the size of our member…ship without the distraction of other trocks being discussed. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5310 "2017-12-08T14:31:12Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > That’s hilarious because I recently remarked to him that he would be the perfect romance novel protagonist. Handsome billionaire playboy with tragic backstory who can never love again? Throw in a BDSM fetish and a maid and we’ve got a bestseller. Fifty Shags of Grey? ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5311 "2017-12-08T15:11:49Z")
> [@naita](#): > > Could we try a little harder not to engage the obvious trolls when they visit the troll thread? I know it’s really difficult, but it ruins my enjoyment of the thread. > > … I’d be all for a “guess who the sock is” thread. But that would just bring the attention they are looking for. This really has to be the best place to mock them because here, we’re allowed to use the T and the S words with impunity. If they find this forum, absent a invite to look herein, then you’re pretty assured that they are a sock, or, perhaps as **Sunny D** calls them, a TROCK. Keeping them in this thread is a favor to those trying to have an adult conversation in another thread. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5312 "2017-12-08T15:14:28Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Fifty Shags of Grey? Okay, that was well played. A perfect reference to Shagg’s monochrome existence. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5313 "2017-12-08T15:37:11Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Fifty Shags of Grey? Heh. If you spend any time scrolling through the free ebooks available from Amazon you’ll find a bazillion of these “handsome billionaire falls in love with humble maid/store assistant/stable girl/McDonald’s cashier” _Fifty Shades_ knockoffs. The fact that they’re being given away for free tells you all you need to know about their quality. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5314 "2017-12-08T15:45:25Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > [Draws out moisture.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kosher_salt) > > Now in this case, it’s being used in a brine. Because kosher salt has larger crystals than table salt, a half cup of kosher has less “salt mass” than table salt. Using table salt in this recipe would make the brine too salty. > No idea why the recipe uses kosher salt rather than a smaller amount of table salt. > A recent _Good Eats_ episode involved roasting duck. Kosher salt was used to dry out the skin before roasting. Makes for a crispier skin. Table salt is iodized. Kosher salt is not. The iodine does have a slight detectable taste to it. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5315 "2017-12-08T16:01:15Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Table salt is iodized. Kosher salt is not. The iodine does have a slight detectable taste to it. There is non-iodized table salt. Though I didn’t know kosher salt wasn’t. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5316 "2017-12-08T16:08:40Z")
Any recipe worth its salt will specify Kosher Salt for everything. ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5317 "2017-12-08T16:10:19Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > I’d be all for a “guess who the sock is” thread. But that would just bring the attention they are looking for. This really has to be the best place to mock them because here, we’re allowed to use the T and the S words with impunity. > > If they find this forum, absent a invite to look herein, then you’re pretty assured that they are a sock, or, perhaps as **Sunny D** calls them, a TROCK. Keeping them in this thread is a favor to those trying to have an adult conversation in another thread. Not derailing the thread with this further, but my suggestion was to shunt them off into separate BBQ Pit threads when they come in here to explain that they’re not really trolls or socks and that the forum is shit anyway. I’m sure that would be even more engaging and further keep them out of the adult conversations. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5318 "2017-12-08T16:16:25Z")
> [@naita](#): > > Not derailing the thread with this further, but my suggestion was to shunt them off into separate BBQ Pit threads when they come in here to explain that they’re not really trolls or socks and that the forum is shit anyway. > > I’m sure that would be even more engaging and further keep them out of the adult conversations. Don’t worry, it would be impossible to derail a thread about how John salts pork butts. Your point is well taken. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5319 "2017-12-08T16:19:01Z")
_Hurhur hur…“butts”…_ ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5320 "2017-12-08T17:13:44Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Any recipe worth its salt will specify Kosher Salt for everything. Kosher salt: when kosh salt just won’t do! ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5321 "2017-12-08T18:09:29Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > Heh. If you spend any time scrolling through the free ebooks available from Amazon you’ll find a bazillion of these “handsome billionaire falls in love with humble maid/store assistant/stable girl/McDonald’s cashier” _Fifty Shades_ knockoffs. The fact that they’re being given away for free tells you all you need to know about their quality. I have a love/hate relationship with romance novels and [this is a good reason why](https://www.amazon.com/Falling-Billionaire-Wolf-Blood-Brotherhood-ebook/dp/B06XZPVXT1). I can’t begrudge other women their fantasies but they are… really… not like mine. I have zero desire to be with a billionaire werewolf father, like not even in idle fantasy. The only reason I would ever write such a story would be to turn all the tropes on their head somehow. Even though it’s not my subgenre, I might try it just to prove it can be done well. I do enjoy messing around with the standard tropes to see how far I can push them. Billionaire hero has a tragic flaw, but it’s not a sexy one… he’s a genuinely entitled ass. Poor, humble heroine is a manipulative gold-digger. Now, let’s try to make these assholes genuinely sympathetic. The problem is that readers of romance novels of this ilk will typically accept nothing less than 100% Mary Sue from their heroines. The furthest they are willing to go with her character flaw is crippling insecurity and unawareness of how totally amazing she is. The hero can be a literal rapist but god fucking forfend the woman has any flaws whatsoever. Lame. I have no idea how to market what I write. It’s romance subgenre sci-fi but also kinda literary. Google ‘‘sci-fi romance’’ and you get omg SO MUCH badly written alien sex. I’ve read a lot of this self-published Amazon stuff because I’m trying to figure out where I fit. So far, no luck. It doesn’t really comfort me that this is the stuff that sells. It seems if you write for a niche it is incredibly easy to be successful but there is no real satisfaction in that from where I’m sitting. Unless you’re [Chuck Tingle,](http://www.chucktingle.com/) god among men. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5322 "2017-12-08T18:11:39Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Kosher salt: when kosh salt just won’t do! Maybe instead of the cornfield, we should be sending some of these guys to the salt mines. Kosher salt mines, of course. Some of them might be Jewish!! ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2017, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489/5323 "2017-12-08T18:13:34Z")
> [@naita](#): > > Could we try a little harder not to engage the obvious trolls when they visit the troll thread? I know it’s really difficult, but it ruins my enjoyment of the thread. > > How about making them their own thread if they are so eager to engage? I’m sure this **Politically Correct arolinus** character would love a separate pit thread where they could insult the size of our member…ship without the distraction of other trocks being discussed. We need a Box forum like the Giraffe Boards has. Lock them in. They can’t get out, but we can poke them with sticks through the bars of the cage. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489.md?page=265) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/omnibus-trolls-r-us-thread/755489.md?page=267)