# On death and Dopers **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 6, 2006, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575 "2006-04-06T14:05:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/21 "2006-04-06T16:16:26Z")
I live alone. Just me and the kitty. My brother (who lives a few states away) and I talk on the phone once a week or so, but have gone a month without any contact (busy busy people) My cousin, who lives about an hour away, and I talk several times a week, but again, if we don’t we just assume the other is busy. My best friend has a key, but again contact is sporadic. So it could be days before anyone realizes I’m permanantly out of commission. Scary, depressing thought ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/22 "2006-04-06T16:16:37Z")
> [@Cluricaun](#): > > If you go out in a blaze of glory and it makes the news it’ll pop up here. Just make sure you wear a t-shirt with your username on it when the time comes. Yeah, \*that’ll \* boggle some minds. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/23 "2006-04-06T16:27:35Z")
> [@lurkernomore](#): > > exactly. The every-so-often “Will anyone know if I die?” thread, you were buried with your name, and nobody came. They mention a restaurant named after a song, you pop up. Fitting. > > And what is wrong with vanilla ice cream? I like it. They wouldn’t sell so much if it wasn’t good. But I consider myself a combo of Tin Roof Sundae, Rocky Road and Moose Tracks, so there is a problem. Who am I kidding? If no-one here hears from me in a week, assume I’ve gone to that far, green country. God knows I’m here every day, almost (barring work and vacas). I’ll leave the light on for you. (I’m 43 and in good health, so hold off on the champagne orders, ok?) ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/24 "2006-04-06T16:30:04Z")
Here’s what I mean by “alpha doper” (from the Anastaseon is not a Fuck Up thread): > [@Nava](#): > > **Anastasaeon** is one of the people here whose name I recognize and jump on because I know whatever they’ve written will probably be interesting and always, always well-written. Sometimes funny (smurfs, uh?), sometimes poignant, but always hitting home. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/25 "2006-04-06T16:39:01Z")
I’m new enough that I don’t know anyone here really, so I doubt anyone would know if I died. On that same note, I don’t really know anyone here so I doubt anyone would care either. In RL though, someone would know within a few hours, barring unusual circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/26 "2006-04-06T16:39:21Z")
My sister knows how to log on as me in the event of my demise. She also has a list of dopers to notify by email. I would want y’all to know so you’ll know I didn’t just get poed and leave. I just left. For good. Unless I can figure out a way to post from beyond the grave, which would be so uber cool! Or maybe I can become a zombie who wanders around the country eating doper brrrrrrraaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnsssssss! Even when you hear I’m dead, fear me still! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/27 "2006-04-06T16:45:44Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > But I consider myself a combo of Tin Roof Sundae, Rocky Road and Moose Tracks, so there is a problem. Remember, you are what you eat… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/28 "2006-04-06T16:47:17Z")
As I said over in the MMP, in the event of my demise, my roommate has instructions to e-mail a Doper and hide my porn before my mom comes to pack up my stuff. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/29 "2006-04-06T17:02:49Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > Even when you hear I’m dead, fear me still! 😃 I think I’d have to fear you in the first place before I could fear you still. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/30 "2006-04-06T17:13:29Z")
> [@Love Rhombus](#): > > Who ARE the alpha Dopers? The question here is who ARE the omega dopers? ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/31 "2006-04-06T17:15:15Z")
> [@Mellivora capensis](#): > > However, I do have this question, which does have a miniscule possibility of an answer. Am I the only one who has wondered about this? No. I often did. Last time when I read the current thread about “our departed dopers”. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/32 "2006-04-06T17:22:34Z")
If I suddenly ceased to exist upon this mortal plane – I doubt that would be noticed by anyone here, now. The Wolf would just have gone on a long distance lope. I don’t post all that much here, anyway. My RL friends aren’t Dopers and don’t know the Dope, so – no worries. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Clam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3bc359/32.png) [@Happy\_Clam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Clam)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/33 "2006-04-06T17:24:15Z")
There’s an easy way to solve this problem- a “Yes I’m Still Alive” thread. Every doper checks in once every 12 (or maybe 8) hours with a post along the lines of “I am still not dead.” That way we’ll know for sure when one of our members kicks the bucket! (Plus the position of the thread will be a useful indicator- if it slips off the front page, mass dopercide has occured). I’ll go and start it in Great Deba- oh. Hang on. We already have them, don’t we? They’re called livejournals. My bad. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/34 "2006-04-06T17:24:47Z")
The Bus Wife refers to you all as “your friends”, as in: “So what do your friends have to say about this week’s Sopranos?” She also says we scare her. Well, except for **troublmakr** now, she thinks you’re ok. But awhile back, she asked me this VERY question. Unlike **Swampbear** though, she doesn’t know my login info. I did however ask her to come on and post as a guest (I suggested Bus Wife so you’ll know it’s really her) and let y’all know if I should drop off the edge of the Disc anytime soon. So, I took care of that. The Kid says if mom forgets, she’ll handle it for me. So if you see a guest post by either of them, grab a hanky and begin the wailing and moaning. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![scotandrsn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a4c791/32.png) [@scotandrsn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scotandrsn)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/35 "2006-04-06T17:39:02Z")
If dying without anyone noticing or caring is the sort of thing that occupies your thoughts, see (or don’t see, depending on your point of view) a documentary called [A Certain Kind of Death](http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0342180/), a 2003 documentary about how the LA County Coroner’s office deals with dead people for whom they can find no trace of a next of kin. It’s about as documentary as a documentary can be, the camera mostly acting as an unspeaking eye on what happens to three such victims. As such, it acts as one of the most poignant commentaries on the human condition I’ve ever seen. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/36 "2006-04-06T17:41:03Z")
My husband has instructions to log on, email the mods, and start a thread about my demise, should it come to pass. It’ll be the signal for everyone to come over and rifle through my stuff. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/37 "2006-04-06T17:52:11Z")
> [@Ice Wolf](#): > > If I suddenly ceased to exist upon this mortal plane – I doubt that would be noticed by anyone here, now. The Wolf would just have gone on a long distance lope. I don’t post all that much here, anyway. > > My RL friends aren’t Dopers and don’t know the Dope, so – no worries. I would notice. Oh, wait, I thought this was **harbor wolf**. (sorry, couldn’t resist) See, I can’t trust my husband to post here-he would think it “unimportant”. My son lurks here, so maybe you’ll get a thread like **start** started long ago. Just so you all know, this thread has totally depressed me. Back to my dull, wretched life now. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/38 "2006-04-06T18:27:21Z")
> [@lurkernomore](#): > > And what is wrong with vanilla ice cream? I like it. They wouldn’t sell so much if it wasn’t good. It sells because it is an excellent base for things like cookie chunks, chocolate syrup, that peanut butter stuff that hardens into a shell, banana splits, maraschino cherries. By itself, not so much. My landlord lives right next door and would notice if I don’t emerge for a while. And she knows she can use her key and come in to check if need be. People know I frequent a board but they wouldn’t know which one or think it was important to let an on-line community know anything. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/39 "2006-04-06T18:33:54Z")
New Doperwear!!! Doper ID bracelets. **"I’m a Doper, in case you find me dead, or squiggling on the floor and about to die, e-mail “[nearestmod@dopermods.com](mailto:nearestmod@dopermods.com)” and tell them (Insert Doper Name Here) has passed on. There’s a fat reward in it for you"** ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2006, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575/40 "2006-04-06T18:37:48Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > Here’s what I mean by “alpha doper” (from the Anastaseon is not a Fuck Up thread): I consider you an alpha doper - I recognize the name and read the post - if I disagreed I’d probably reread it more carefully, to give you the benefit of the doubt. I might even open a thread simply because **Kalhoun** started it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-death-and-dopers/351575.md?page=3)