# On top of everything else...my grandmother died today **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 17, 2003, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177 "2003-01-17T05:22:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/1 "2003-01-17T05:22:30Z")
She was 87, and she’d had a stroke a month ago that all of us agreed left her to a life worse than death. She lived a long full life–heck, she’s even been dead before. She had an aneurysm 50 years ago that doctors thought had killed her. It wasn’t until a pitiable worker in the morgue saw her moving under the sheet hours later that they realized they were wrong. She was married 69 years, and her husband preceded her in death by two years. She was tired and said she was ready when her time came…and had a stroke the day after saying that. She was ready, dammit. There is nothing tragic in her death. But I’m sad to see her go. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Jonno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f19dbf/32.png) [@Jonno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonno)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/2 "2003-01-17T05:28:40Z")
My sympathies go out to you and your family. Just because something is right, doesn’t make it easy. ---
**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/3 "2003-01-17T06:11:36Z")
Honey, it doesn’t matter how much a person is ready to go…those who love that person aren’t READY for them to go. At least, that has been my experience. And to my eternal regret, I have had all too much experience with losing people I loved. You loved her, you aren’t ready to lose her. It is all natural. I expect that thousands of years ago, people were feeling just the same way that you do when they lost a person they loved. It is all natural, and it doesn’t make it hurt one bit less. Losing someone you love just plain stinks. I am so sorry, darling. I know, KNOW how much it hurts and I am sending you all my best love and prayers as you deal with this loss. My Love, Cheri ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/4 "2003-01-17T06:16:57Z")
☹ ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/5 "2003-01-17T06:48:38Z")
**Ruffian** , The passing of a loved one, no matter their age, has an effect on us. My thoughts are with you while you deal with this. It’s not easy. Be peaceful with the thought that she is most likely in a better place and probably looking over you to help guide you. I truely believe that that we loved do stay with us. Hugs to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![cadolphin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c37758/32.png) [@cadolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cadolphin)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/6 "2003-01-17T07:48:43Z")
**Rico** and I send our prayers and best wishes to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/7 "2003-01-17T07:55:47Z")
My condolences to you and your family, **Ruffian**. ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/8 "2003-01-17T08:17:20Z")
So sorry to hear that, Ruffian. As a fellow Hoosier, I can sense the bonds and memories you had of your grandmother. It is always tough, no matter what the age. Sending my sympathies and thoughts to you. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![DAVEW0071](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e19b73/32.png) [@DAVEW0071](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAVEW0071)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/9 "2003-01-17T12:31:29Z")
I’m sorry for your loss, **Ruffian**. She sounds like she was one fabulous woman. And she lived a long, rich life. May you continue to carry cherished memories of her. ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/10 "2003-01-17T13:24:37Z")
{{{{Ruffian}}}} I can only agree with every word \*\* Scotticher \*\* wrote. (She is a very wise woman). I am sorry for your loss. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/11 "2003-01-17T13:25:31Z")
condolences on your loss. treasure your memories of her, remember why you love her and you’ll have honoured her the best way anyone can. ---
**Author:** ![bernse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9a28c/32.png) [@bernse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bernse)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/12 "2003-01-17T14:29:42Z")
Welcome to the club ☹ [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=155886](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=155886) ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/13 "2003-01-17T14:42:41Z")
Thank you all for your sympathies and kind words. **Scotticher** thank you for reminding me that it’s okay to be sad. I know, logically, that it is to be expected and understood, but I’ve had some mixed feelings. I’m going to work today because the only other option is to stay home and basically mope. My parents are out East, and my sister–whose life is a big mess of a different sort–didn’t want any company today. (That’s not a bad thing…her situation is a long story.) So…my students and my routine will be my comfort. Later, after work, I’ll post a few details about her death…and her life. My mom, who was there when she passed, said it was “a beautiful death, if death truly can be beautiful.” Thank you all, again. ---
**Author:** ![Siemsi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b19c9b/32.png) [@Siemsi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siemsi)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/14 "2003-01-17T14:46:21Z")
My deepest sympathy to you and your family… ((((hugs & prayers)))) ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/on-top-of-everything-else-my-grandmother-died-today/149177/15 "2003-01-17T23:03:52Z")
i’m sorry ruffian. sometimes the longer a person is with us, the more we think they should and always will be there. may her memory be eternal.