# Once more I waste my time trying to read "The Lord of the Rings" **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 27, 2010, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516 "2010-12-27T14:53:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/21 "2010-12-28T09:16:27Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > I haven’t been able to get into “The Hobbit” yet, but I did manage “Lord of the Rings.” For me the trick was to just skim over the songs and the parts where Tolkien was describing every leaf and twig in a forest - that turned it into a legendary fantasy story. I might have to have another go at “The Hobbit” one of these days, too. The songs and poetry are great though! ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/22 "2010-12-28T09:42:36Z")
Seriously, OP gets gynaecological sand over “eleventy-one”? It’s not as though the real world lacks illogical numbering systems - beginning with English, which has special words for all the teens but especially the first two. French is worse: it doesn’t start calling things “-teen” until it gets all the way to seventeen, and the decades go “… fifty, sixty, sixty-ten, fourscore, fourscore-ten…”. OTTOMH the only logical numbering system I know of is Chinese, which really does go “…nine, ten, ten-one, ten-two…” etc. Dislike LotR if you want - the author himself gives you leave to find it twee and silly - but at least grasp what the opening sentence tells you: that hobbits are rather simple, rustic folk, and that the main character from the previous book has lived to an age great enough to attract interest. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/23 "2010-12-28T10:25:41Z")
I actually quite enjoyed the use of 'eleventy". But it begged the obvious question of what to call other triple digit numbers. “Eleventy” rolls off the tongue quite nicely, but “tenty” “twelvety” “thirteenty” etc do not. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/24 "2010-12-28T12:20:45Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > Well, there are plenty of books that I’ve never bothered picking up at all, which is about the only way you can be put off a book faster than the first sentence. > > I have never been able to get past the first page of any James Joyce novel. The opening sentence of _Finnegan’s Wake_ is a continuation of the final sentence, so you can’t really not get through the first sentence of the thing without reading all the way to the end… ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/25 "2010-12-28T12:33:46Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > Seconded. I love LOTR (as my username will surely reveal) and think Tolkien built his legendarium, word by word, with amazing skill and ageless appeal. But it’s clearly not for everyone. And doesn’t _Star Trek_ suck? And what about those stupid cats everyone has? Yeah, definately the wrong message board. You want the other board, the one down the street. That way. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/26 "2010-12-28T13:06:00Z")
I have to confess this is really depressing. I saw this thread on page one and looked to see what was posted in reply and I can’t believe how pathetic it is. Look at the thread title and ask yourself how much time did I really waste reading one line of text. It’s a joke. I said the same thing to my LOTR loving family at breakfast the next morning, made the same uber-realist comment about number systems and copped all the same explanations/criticisms, but all done with good humor and grace. It was intended as a starting point for some fun at my own expense. They acted as if I were backward and ill informed and didn’t have to resort to insulting me to make their point. I thought I may get a few laughs here from LOTR fans but after the first few all the fans appear to be humorless. So perhaps I don’t know half of you half as well as I should, and maybe I like more than half of you less than half as well as you think you deserve. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/27 "2010-12-28T13:17:03Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > So perhaps I don’t know half of you half as well as I should, and maybe I like more than half of you less than half as well as you think you deserve. You fibbed! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/28 "2010-12-28T13:22:51Z")
I re-read _The Hobbit_ over the Christmas weekend, for the eleventyest time, I started last night on _Lord of the Rings_. I re-read it about once a year. I am up to the end of the long expected party. It gets better every time. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/29 "2010-12-28T14:05:28Z")
> [@The\_Amazing\_Hanna](#): > > ‘Eleventy’ has a story. It’s comes from the Old English word hundendleftig. This tells us that Tolkien was an out-and-out Anglo-Saxon linguistics nerd. Ah, so my four-year-old granddaughter is an Anglo-Saxon linguist. Fancy that. Wait until I tell her parents. I’ve been trying to read **Rememberance of Things Past** for about 20 years. I think I’m on page 48 now. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/30 "2010-12-28T14:11:50Z")
> [@PoorYorick](#): > > Ah, so my four-year-old granddaughter is an Anglo-Saxon linguist. Fancy that. Wait until I tell her parents. > > I’ve been trying to read **Rememberance of Things Past** for about 20 years. I think I’m on page 48 now. Grab a plate of madeleines and a pot of tea and you’ll be fine. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/31 "2010-12-28T14:18:04Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > It’s not as though the real world lacks illogical numbering systems - beginning with English, which has special words for all the teens but especially the first two. Same as German, where they start with…oh my god…_elf!_ ---
**Author:** ![GreenHell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@GreenHell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreenHell)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/32 "2010-12-28T14:25:18Z")
First post slams Tolkein. Second post slams the Bible. Third post levels a charge of blasphemy . . . for criticizing Tolkein. I love the Dope! : ) ---
**Author:** ![GreenHell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@GreenHell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreenHell)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/33 "2010-12-28T14:28:26Z")
I have to say that, in general, I never really liked the songs and poems. But, ever since I heard a recording of Tolkein reciting “The Rhyme of the Troll”, it has been a tradition for me to sing it to any infant I’m rocking or lulling to sleep. Despite my being a terrible singer, it has been my experience that babies find male singing soothing. I’ve read that the lower pitch of the masculine voice causes palpable vibrations in the throat and chest that they find soothing. Plus, I find the story amusing. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/34 "2010-12-28T14:49:50Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > I have to confess this is really depressing. I saw this thread on page one and looked to see what was posted in reply and I can’t believe how pathetic it is. > > Look at the thread title and ask yourself how much time did I really waste reading one line of text. It’s a joke. I said the same thing to my LOTR loving family at breakfast the next morning, made the same uber-realist comment about number systems and copped all the same explanations/criticisms, but all done with good humor and grace. It was intended as a starting point for some fun at my own expense. > > They acted as if I were backward and ill informed and didn’t have to resort to insulting me to make their point. > > I thought I may get a few laughs here from LOTR fans but after the first few all the fans appear to be humorless. > > So perhaps I don’t know half of you half as well as I should, and maybe I like more than half of you less than half as well as you think you deserve. You get that you’re just typing something on a message board and not actually having a face to face conversation with friends and relatives who know your mannerisms and humor, right? I can’t even concede I’ve been whooshed here because I think that when each and every single person in this thread not only believed you to be truthful but didn’t even theorize that the post may have been a joke…well, you may want to rethink whether it came across as one or not. Oh, and FTR, I thought LOTR was pretty boring too. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/35 "2010-12-28T15:21:43Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > You get that you’re just typing something on a message board and not actually having a face to face conversation with friends and relatives who know your mannerisms and humor, right? Yep. I typed it on a message board and knew that I was doing that, the rest is redundant. > [@Enderw24](#): > > I can’t even concede I’ve been whooshed here because I think that when each and every single person in this thread not only believed you to be truthful but didn’t even theorize that the post may have been a joke…well, you may want to rethink whether it came across as one or not. Not everyone took it seriously and thought I needed to be chastised, only a pathetic few. Others chose to treat it as a joke or correct my wrongheadedness. > [@Enderw24](#): > > Oh, and FTR, I thought LOTR was pretty boring too. Wouldn’t know. I have tried to read it 3 times over the last 40 odd years and can’t get in to it. But I never said it was boring. But again you are simply confirming my point. I am happy to be the butt of jokes about an unpopular opinion but why do people feel the need to treat it as more than that? Your post isn’t an attempt at amusing repartee it is just another attempt to tell me I shouldn’t have posted the OP. Should I send all my OPs to you for prior approval before I post them? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/36 "2010-12-28T15:28:27Z")
I was a nerdy teenager, long ago, and in the Seventies, I attended a school consisting largely of fellow nerds. And it sure SEEMED at the time that I was the only person I knew who WASN’T an ardent Tokien fan. As high school freshmen, we were assigned to read “The Hobbit,” which I enjoyed well enough. But when everybody else got engrossed in Tolkien’s work, I didn’t. My Mom bought me “The Silmarillion,” which put me to sleep. And, unlike Don’t Ask, I didn’t give up on “Fellowship of the Ring” after the first paragraph. Rather, I got bored in the Tom Bombadil section, and didn’t pick up the book again until just before the Peter Jackson movie came out. This time, I liked it a lot better, and finished the trilogy. But I’m still only a tepid fan of Tolkien and of the fantasy genre as a whole. ---
**Author:** ![lalenin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@lalenin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lalenin)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/37 "2010-12-28T15:33:45Z")
Not only have a found the books unreadable, but every time I’ve tried to watch the movies I’ve fallen asleep in the first 30 minutes. Based on the reactions of everyone around me I’ve always thought I was alone in this. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/38 "2010-12-28T15:34:21Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > Your post isn’t an attempt at amusing repartee it is just another attempt to tell me I shouldn’t have posted the OP. Should I send all my OPs to you for prior approval before I post them? That would be awesome. Lemme go get my red ink pen. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/39 "2010-12-28T15:41:44Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > That would be awesome. Lemme go get my red ink pen. You realize that when you edit my emails the red ink pen will fuck up your monitor? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2010, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516/40 "2010-12-28T15:45:56Z")
> [@lalenin](#): > > Not only have a found the books unreadable, but every time I’ve tried to watch the movies I’ve fallen asleep in the first 30 minutes. Based on the reactions of everyone around me I’ve always thought I was alone in this. I did slog through the books eventually, but fell asleep in the first ten minutes of the first movie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-more-i-waste-my-time-trying-to-read-the-lord-of-the-rings/565516.md?page=3)