# Once Upon A Time, A Man Sat In A Tree, Watching A Crocodile Eat A Chainsaw. With Link **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 28, 2006, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594 "2006-04-28T14:48:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/1 "2006-04-28T14:48:18Z")
Damn thieving Crocodiles! Stealing a man’s chainsaw, just to slobber mustard all over it, slap it on a Sesame Seed Bun, & scarf it down! Could’ve bought it at McNasty’s, didn’t need to _steal_ it! > **[BBC NEWS | Asia-Pacific | Aussie chainsaw croc runs amok](http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/4953668.stm)** > > A crocodile in northern Australia chases a storm-clearance worker up a tree and takes his chainsaw. > [@](#): > > “It was still going and he took the chainsaw onto the ground and proceeded to smash it and it stalled. The crocodile didn’t cut himself, just broke a few teeth.” > [@](#): > > “He chewed on the chainsaw for about an hour-and-a-half, then we finally got it out.” Maybe the guy should have popped for a pizza & some beers after all. ---
**Author:** ![NE\_Texan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e99b99/32.png) [@NE\_Texan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NE_Texan)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/2 "2006-04-28T15:57:42Z")
You know, I see a story like this in the news, and I think to myself… “How long until I see Bosda start a thread about this? and which board will I see it on?” But now I’m wondering about croc teeth. He ate a running chainsaw - and the chainsaw was damaged, and the croc unhurt? Ouch! (“I fought the saw and the, saw… LOST!”) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/3 "2006-04-28T16:14:25Z")
[QUOTE=NE Texan] You know, I see a story like this in the news, and I think to myself… “How long until I see Bosda start a thread about this? and which board will I see it on?” But now I’m wondering about croc teeth. He ate a running chainsaw - and the chainsaw was damaged, and the croc unhurt? Ouch! (“I fought the saw and the, saw… LOST!”) [/QUOTE] Ah…I have another fan. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/4 "2006-04-28T16:31:53Z")
[QUOTE=NE Texan] (“I fought the saw and the, saw… LOST!”) [/QUOTE] And there goes my monitor. Thanks. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/5 "2006-04-28T16:54:33Z")
That settles it. Crocodiles are not just hungry. They are assholes. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/6 "2006-04-28T19:09:28Z")
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug] That settles it. Crocodiles are not just hungry. They are assholes. [/QUOTE] Nah. They’re just damn good at noise control when they want to be. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/7 "2006-04-28T19:51:39Z")
[QUOTE=Ice Wolf] Nah. They’re just damn good at noise control when they want to be. [/QUOTE] I need one of these guys in my moat when the asshole neighbor plays Black Sabbath at 11:00. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/8 "2006-04-28T20:30:33Z")
Man this sounds like some kind of bizzare death match. “Crocodile vs. Chainsaw! This Saturday on pay per veiw!” ---
**Author:** ![JohnBckWLD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JohnBckWLD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnBckWLD)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/9 "2006-04-28T20:40:47Z")
Now, lest anyone think I am a heartless bastard who despises chainsaws, let me point out the following: Chainsaws pollute the environment and cause many more emergency room visits than reptiles and amphibians combined. The area is a known habitat for gators and Brutus’ abode was crushed by a felled tree. No one was injured in this arborist equipment attack. I think this was a case of Darwin at work. It’s an inconvenience to the saw manufacturer’s warranty department, but that chainsaw was out-tootheed 2:1. Look, Einstein, there are a few absolutes in life. Don’t pee on an electric fence, toast will always land buttered side down when you drop it. Speaking of which, dropping trees on crocodile habitats is an [incredibly stupid](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=192131) thing to do. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/10 "2006-04-28T23:01:39Z")
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug] That settles it. Crocodiles are not just hungry. They are assholes. [/QUOTE] No, assholes are neighbors who borrow your _lawn mower_ & never return it. I dunno _what_ neighbors who eat your chainsaw would be classed as; Circus Geeks, mayhap? ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2006, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/11 "2006-04-28T23:47:05Z")
[QUOTE=NE Texan] But now I’m wondering about croc teeth. He ate a running chainsaw - and the chainsaw was damaged, and the croc unhurt? Ouch! (“I fought the saw and the, saw… LOST!”) [/QUOTE] If this is a serious comment in any way, I think I can explain. The blade on a modern chainsaw doesn’t automatically turn when the motor is on. You have to grab a control under the grip and the throttle on top to make it spin. Therefore, the motor could have been driving the croc crazy and it is feasible that it could chomp on it for a while. Might be hot though. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2006, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/12 "2006-04-29T00:16:09Z")
Sheesh! Isn’t it obvious? Man in tree. Crocodile with chainsaw. Think it through; what do you think the crocodile was trying to do? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2006, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/13 "2006-04-29T00:40:44Z")
Or maybe it’s a teaser for the sequel to _Snakes On A Plane_. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2006, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/once-upon-a-time-a-man-sat-in-a-tree-watching-a-crocodile-eat-a-chainsaw-with-link/354594/14 "2006-04-29T13:07:16Z")
[QUOTE=Mangetout] Sheesh! Isn’t it obvious? Man in tree. Crocodile with chainsaw. Think it through; what do you think the crocodile was trying to do? [/QUOTE] You can certainly see the Gary Larsen _Far side_ cartoon in it.