# One attendee at a family thanksgiving doesn't want to celebrate on that day **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 13, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620 "2010-09-13T16:54:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Chicken\_Fingers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Chicken\_Fingers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chicken_Fingers)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/21 "2010-09-13T17:16:31Z")
So basically they want to fly in specially to stop you all from celebrating Thanksgiving? Once I stopped laughing, I would tell them to either stay home, or that they need to shut up and come in the spirit of getting together with family, feeling generally thankful, and eating good food. Since when do you have to be a believer in the premise of a holiday or occasion to join friends or loved ones. ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/22 "2010-09-13T17:18:10Z")
> [@Baracus](#): > > Perhaps I did not read your post close enough, but what is Causehead’s solution here? Have the feast on another day? Not call it “Thanksgiving”? Not have a feast? > > Not that it really makes a difference, just that trying to sanitize the event by either of the first two is extra retarded. > > If they don’t like it they should just stay home. yes, the solution is to have the “family dinner” on Friday, as then it is both removed from Thanksgiving in spirit (the dinner never was “Thanksgiving” in that traditional spirit of the date) and in actual date (I gather the offensive part). She’s a vegan, if you wanted that little detail just to flesh out your image of Causehead. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/23 "2010-09-13T17:19:44Z")
Have everyone dress up as Pilgrims and supply “We’re #1” foam fingers for all. Try to get everyone else there before Causehead arrives. Hilarity/asploding head ensues. ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/24 "2010-09-13T17:20:15Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > Have everyone dress up as Pilgrims and supply “We’re #1” foam fingers for all. Try to get everyone else there before Causehead arrives. > > Hilarity/asploding head ensues. I’d crack out my buckle shoes for that. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/25 "2010-09-13T17:20:54Z")
Would you stop celebrating birthdays because one of your in-laws is a Jehovah’s Witness? ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/26 "2010-09-13T17:21:46Z")
Tell her that you will have dinner on Thursday as planned but because you understand this is important to her you will find a way to travel backwards in time and kick a pilgrim squarely in the butt for their transgressions. Also tell her that if someone invited you to a Thanksgiving dinner but there was no meat you would say, “Hey goober, where’s the meat?” because you don’t win friends with salad. ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/27 "2010-09-13T17:21:48Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Would you stop celebrating birthdays because one of your in-laws is a Jehovah’s Witness? no, apparently we’d just move the celebration a day later 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/28 "2010-09-13T17:22:53Z")
Oh, just to provide even more fun details: Causehead is a fiancee/in-law-in-waiting. So, yeah, I’ve got decades more of this shit to handle apparently. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/29 "2010-09-13T17:23:57Z")
Allowing one relation to dictate the habits and traditions of everyone else is stupid. Ask Causehead when he/she is moving out of the country, and giving their land and property back to the so-called original owners. ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/30 "2010-09-13T17:25:34Z")
Mr Kitty is not a fan of the concept of Thanksgiving (it’s not the Native American/Pilgrim thing- it has something to do with the Civil War but I admit my eyes glaze over when he tries to explain it) PLUS for the first several years of our marriage he was a vegetarian, but I am a turkey _fiend_. We got around it by me 1) not mentioning that we were having this fabulous big meal in celebration of anything in particular, 2) making plenty of non-meat tasty things for him, and 3) taking care of all the prep/cooking/cleaning myself. Have your get-together on Thursday, don’t put out any pilgrim decorations (cornucopias are right out as well), and tell the causehead to suck it the fuck up or they don’t get any yummy turkey. ETA: just read the updated info. Skip directly to “tell the causehead to suck it the fuck up.” DAMN what an idiot. Have fun with that. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/31 "2010-09-13T17:27:49Z")
Look, I only get that Thursday off. I don’t have off whatever day you’d like to get together for your little whatever. So if you want a family feast, you’re getting it Thursday. (Plus, everything’s on sale that you’re going to need for then.) ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/32 "2010-09-13T17:28:11Z")
> [@bobkitty](#): > > Mr Kitty is not a fan of the concept of Thanksgiving (it’s not the Native American/Pilgrim thing- it has something to do with the Civil War but I admit my eyes glaze over when he tries to explain it) PLUS for the first several years of our marriage he was a vegetarian, but I am a turkey _fiend_. We got around it by me 1) not mentioning that we were having this fabulous big meal in celebration of anything in particular, 2) making plenty of non-meat tasty things for him, and 3) taking care of all the prep/cooking/cleaning myself. > > Have your get-together on Thursday, don’t put out any pilgrim decorations (cornucopias are right out as well), and tell the causehead to suck it the fuck up or they don’t get any yummy turkey. she’s vegan, and I don’t serve soyurkey at my dinner table. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/33 "2010-09-13T17:29:35Z")
> [@bobkitty](#): > > Have your get-together on Thursday, don’t put out any pilgrim decorations (cornucopias are right out as well), and tell the causehead to suck it the fuck up or they don’t get any yummy turkey. **Rumor** mentioned that Causehead is a vegan so she’s already screwed herself out any yumminess. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/34 "2010-09-13T17:31:01Z")
Right. Let me just change my whole like for you. Ridiculous. I know a militant vegan who no longer will allow her only child to visit for the holidays because daughter insists on brining met. Right, the turkey or pig is more important than your daughter. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/35 "2010-09-13T17:31:26Z")
Remind her that the annual observance of Thanksgiving in the US originated in 1863 from proclaimation by President Lincoln, who freed the slaves, as a reminder that even during the Civil War, Americans had a lot to be thankful for. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/36 "2010-09-13T17:33:31Z")
Wait, if Causehead is a vegan, is she also from California? Because that would totally complete the picture in my head. ---
**Author:** ![Rumor\_Watkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@Rumor\_Watkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rumor_Watkins)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/37 "2010-09-13T17:34:35Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > Wait, if Causehead is a vegan, is she also from California? Because that would totally complete the picture in my head. no, unfortunately. ---
**Author:** ![Not\_a\_Platypus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/38 "2010-09-13T17:35:18Z")
One one hand I don’t think it’s a big deal to move it to the next day if nobody else cares, but on the other hand it’s a seriously stupid solution to her “problem”. You’re still having a Thanksgiving dinner, no matter what day you do it. Generally for me and my boyfriend we celebrate Thanksgiving with my parents on the day, and we see his family on the nearest day everyone can make it. Sometimes it’s Saturday or Monday, but it’s still us getting together for Thanksgiving. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/39 "2010-09-13T17:38:05Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > > [@Rumor\_Watkins](#): > > > > the problem is that they’re flying in and the dinner is in my place. > > You’re the host, and you’re inviting people to your house. You set the rules, not the guests. If they don’t like it, they don’t have to come. Exactly. They can join you or not. If they don’t want to have “Thanksgiving Dinner,” offer to find the one restaurant in town that’ll be open on Thanksgiving and they can go there while the rest are having dinner. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2010, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620/40 "2010-09-13T17:43:44Z")
> [@Rumor\_Watkins](#): > > Oh, just to provide even more fun details: Causehead is a fiancee/in-law-in-waiting. > > So, yeah, I’ve got decades more of this shit to handle apparently. OK, in this case, you need to do everything possible to offend this person NOW, in hopes of sparing your relative the grief that she’s sure to bring. Hell, set up a table in the kitchen so that she and possibly her intended can eat without hassling the grown ups. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-attendee-at-a-family-thanksgiving-doesnt-want-to-celebrate-on-that-day/553620.md?page=3)