# One-liners that suggest a great story **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 4, 2015, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606 "2015-06-04T03:48:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/21 "2015-06-04T18:06:14Z")
If memory serves, **Kobal2** , didn’t Gary Larson say that he quit drawing _The Far Side_ because the readers were getting weirder than the cartoons? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/22 "2015-06-04T18:11:57Z")
“My father fought in the Clone Wars?” ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/23 "2015-06-04T18:16:59Z")
So the butler stuck his dick in the mashed potatoes. ---
**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/24 "2015-06-04T18:26:33Z")
Niagra Falls??? Slooowly I turn… ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/25 "2015-06-04T18:27:57Z")
My go-to hook line for a novel is: “The building was on fire, and it wasn’t my fault.” Jim Butcher (The Dresden Files #6 - Blood Rites) Found another good one last night. “The Life of the Mind” by John Scalzi starts off: “So, I’m supposed to tell you how I became a brain in a box.” It doesn’t come out 'til next week, but there’s an excerpt over at Tor. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/26 "2015-06-04T18:27:58Z")
Brian: I am NOT the Messiah! Arthur: I say you are Lord, and I should know. I’ve followed a few. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/27 "2015-06-04T18:38:24Z")
And that’s when I bought the horse a prostitute! ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/28 "2015-06-04T18:41:02Z")
I’ve never seen so many dead hookers in all my life! ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/29 "2015-06-04T18:43:14Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I’ve got debts that no honest man can pay. I wonder if he knew the guy who “got in a little hometown jam”. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/30 "2015-06-04T18:47:59Z")
No sir, a 10-82 is disappearing a dead hooker from Ben Affleck’s trailer. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/31 "2015-06-04T18:51:28Z")
> [@](#): > > It was a bright, cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![CheshireKat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheshirekat/32/1207_2.png) [@CheshireKat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CheshireKat)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/32 "2015-06-04T18:59:26Z")
> [@Wolverine](#): > > “If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.” > > from anonymous person as shared by Lewis Black I have always wondered if this line came from me. Several months before Lewis used it in his routine, I was living in Houston and having lunch in a restaurant with a friend. We were talking about my last year at U of T, during which I almost dropped out (that’s another story). I was so stressed at UT that my parents sent my mare to a stable outside Austin so I could ride every day and have a break from university problems. It worked, and enabled me to finish the year. This is what I was telling my friend, and I can imagine myself saying that line to her. Probably just a coincidence, but now no one has to have an aneurism over it - there could be a logical explanation to that line. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gothic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Gothic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gothic)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/33 "2015-06-04T19:00:15Z")
The course of true love never did run smooth. William Shakespeare ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/34 "2015-06-04T19:07:32Z")
Never fall in love during a total eclipse. ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/35 "2015-06-04T19:29:41Z")
> [@CheshireKat](#): > > I have always wondered if this line came from me. Several months before Lewis used it in his routine, I was living in Houston and having lunch in a restaurant with a friend. We were talking about my last year at U of T, during which I almost dropped out (that’s another story). > > I was so stressed at UT that my parents sent my mare to a stable outside Austin so I could ride every day and have a break from university problems. It worked, and enabled me to finish the year. This is what I was telling my friend, and I can imagine myself saying that line to her. > > Probably just a coincidence, but now no one has to have an aneurism over it - there could be a logical explanation to that line. 😃 You should definitely tell Lewis Black about this; I’m sure it would make his day. Imagine if you were the key to the happiness and joy that has eluded him thus far! My contribution: [“I don’t know. It was on fire when I lay down on it.”](http://www.doyletics.com/_arj1/itwasonf.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/36 "2015-06-04T19:35:03Z")
It was a dark and stormy night … ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/37 "2015-06-04T19:41:14Z")
Ever since the Noodle Incident… ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/38 "2015-06-04T20:12:45Z")
“I pulled into Nazareth, feelin’ 'bout half past dead.” ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/39 "2015-06-04T20:15:20Z")
“Your on desk duty! And you’re banned for life from Ditmus Burger!” ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2015, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-liners-that-suggest-a-great-story/721606/40 "2015-06-04T20:36:33Z")
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