# One of the greatest (but lesser known) useful bits of wisdom is...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [October 26, 2003, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603 "2003-10-26T02:52:21Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@born\_too\_late](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/born_too_late)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/1 "2003-10-26T02:52:21Z")
…never whistle while inserting your contact lenses.
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### Author:  [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/2 "2003-10-26T12:32:39Z")
Semper ubi sub ubi.
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### Author:  [@HDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HDS)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/3 "2003-10-26T13:05:15Z")
Wash your produce. Wash it again.
I actually was pretty lazy about it until I started work in a grocery store and have seen untold numbers of people sneezing and coughing and touching and smelling and tasting and who knows what else all over it.
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### Author:  [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/4 "2003-10-26T13:47:18Z")
Bumper sticker I spied yesterday: “If you can see the foam on my latte, you’re too close.”
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### Author:  [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/5 "2003-10-26T14:52:51Z")
If you have to eat a turd, it’s best not to nibble at it.
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### Author:  [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/6 "2003-10-26T22:17:18Z")
You cannot help someone by doing for them what they should or could do for themselves.
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### Author:  [@carlotta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carlotta)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/7 "2003-10-26T23:06:33Z")
You can make reservations to go to the Uffizi and not wait in that godawful line. The Accademia too.
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### Author:  [@Rashak\_Mani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rashak_Mani)
#### Post date: [October 26, 2003, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/8 "2003-10-26T23:58:28Z")
Don’t drink and drive… you might spill your drink…
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### Author:  [@Carne\_asada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carne_asada)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/9 "2003-10-27T00:01:54Z")
If it wasn’t for time, everything would happen all at once.
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### Author:  [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/10 "2003-10-27T00:03:20Z")
Never stand up in a canoe.
Man, I sure learned that one the hard way…
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/11 "2003-10-27T00:11:15Z")
Never canoe with somebody that doesn’t know not to stand up.
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### Author:  [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/12 "2003-10-27T00:32:41Z")
Once you’re a self-sufficient adult, the only thing you _have_ to do is pay taxes. Don’t listen to all the people out there who claim “you _have_ to try this / do this / spend time with those people / listen to A / buy X, etc” You really don’t.
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### Author:  [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/13 "2003-10-27T00:40:07Z")
Objects in the rear-view window are closer than they appear.
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### Author:  [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/14 "2003-10-27T00:42:00Z")
oh, for the love of – I meant Mirror, not Window.
Sigh.
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### Author:  [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/15 "2003-10-27T01:03:37Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Blonde \*
> \*\*oh, for the love of – I meant Mirror, not Window.
>
> Sigh. \*\*
LOL. Long day Blonde?
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### Author:  [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/16 "2003-10-27T01:08:04Z")
Research studies have shown that cursing when you have hurt yourself is actually good for you physically.
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### Author:  [@t-keela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-keela)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/17 "2003-10-27T01:15:00Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Zoe \*
> \*\*Research studies have shown that cursing when you have hurt yourself is actually good for you physically. \*\*
and along those same lines:
Studies show that people who curse a lot have lower cancer rates.
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### Author:  [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/18 "2003-10-27T01:22:27Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Khadaji \*
> \*\*LOL. Long day Blonde? \*\*
More like a hard day’s (last) night! I’m weary, but still here.
OK, I’ll try to get this one right the first time:
To know the road ahead, ask those coming back. – Chinese proverb
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### Author:  [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/19 "2003-10-27T01:34:28Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by t-keela \*
> \*\*and along those same lines:
>
> Studies show that people who curse a lot have lower cancer rates. \*\*
You don’t say? I don’t curse unless I’m really angry - but I think my chance of getting cancer just went down to 0% after my meltdown last night. 🙂
I’ve posted this one before (and it’s a tad odd) - but here you go:
Don’t put your right hand down the disposal unit. – Mom
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### Author:  [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)
#### Post date: [October 27, 2003, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-greatest-but-lesser-known-useful-bits-of-wisdom-is/209603/20 "2003-10-27T04:18:19Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by t-keela \*
> \*\*Studies show that people who curse a lot have lower cancer rates. \*\*
Shit! I _knew_ I wasn’t cursing enough! 🙂
My contribution:
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
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