# One of the U.S.'s fifty largest cities is to be destroyed. Argue the case that City X not be it. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 1, 2012, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073 "2012-01-01T19:41:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2012, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/41 "2012-01-02T21:12:14Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > Nuking DC would be profoundly foolish - while the government exists, it can capitulate, and democratic states are unlikely to resist in the face of the casaulties our Martians could inflict. Once the US has capitulated, governing it through existing structures (centered in Washington) would be a simpler matter than building an occupation government from scratch. For that matter, our new overlords can simply compel the existing government to cooperate (on pain of more city-nuking) without troubling to occupy the Union. Nuking DC just doesn’t make sense, especially as the first city to be nuked. All true, but the Martians don’t seem interested in conquest in the first place. If they were they could have just announced they were going to obliterate, say, Little Rock, done so, and then demanded our surrender. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/42 "2012-01-03T04:55:22Z")
New York has been blowed up enough. Take it someplace else. ---
**Author:** ![ProbablyProcrastinating](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/57b2e6/32.png) [@ProbablyProcrastinating](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ProbablyProcrastinating)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/43 "2012-01-03T06:25:17Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > Please spare Seattle. It’s simply too pretty to die. [Amazon.com](http://Amazon.com), Boeing, Microsoft, Starbucks… not to mention the home of LOLCats (have you seen postcards with cats and funny pictures on them?). Where would the nation get its quilted down jackets??? Also, we are very nice here and if you ask us to stop sending rovers, we totally will. In fact, we have some great unions working in plants involved in parts manufacture for some of the Mars rovers. We may be able to get them to strike until they promise NOT to send any more rovers. Their last negotiations were successful so you have a potential ally in us. ---
**Author:** ![WillFarnaby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/willfarnaby/32/514_2.png) [@WillFarnaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WillFarnaby)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/44 "2012-01-03T08:11:29Z")
Baltimore, Maryland. The hometown of the Great Bambino. We saved everyone from the British. The Social Security Administration is based here and you know you need elderly support. ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 11:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/45 "2012-01-03T11:36:42Z")
It’s only been 147 years since the last time Atlanta was destroyed. Since we’ve already had to rebuild once (and that reconstruction took a long time), we should totally be spared. At least the city proper. Have at the suburbs. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/46 "2012-01-03T12:10:28Z")
I’m with Lsura on this one. Atlanta is my native city and the suburbs outside the perimeter [http://atlanta.about.com/od/neighborhoods/f/ITP\_OTP.htm](http://atlanta.about.com/od/neighborhoods/f/ITP_OTP.htm) should be scolded but not nuked. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/47 "2012-01-03T12:22:37Z")
I was all prepared to defend Terre Haute on the grounds that it had a new library but it’s not on the list. So instead I’ll pick [Cleveland](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZzgAjjuqZM). ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/48 "2012-01-03T12:51:49Z")
Not from the US, but New York _should_ be spared, because (_apparently_) it is [the capital of the world.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=634428) ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/49 "2012-01-03T14:20:17Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > I was all prepared to defend Terre Haute on the grounds that it had a new library but it’s not on the list. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/50 "2012-01-03T15:30:05Z")
I was gonna make an impassioned plea for Houston, but it occurs to me that vaporizing it would instantly make my place a beachfront property, so hey, fire away. ---
**Author:** ![howye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9adbd/32.png) [@howye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/howye)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/51 "2012-01-03T15:34:39Z")
> [@Maiira](#): > > Spare Minneapolis because it’s the gayest city in the US. Sorry, but Columbus was named 2011 Top Gay Travel Destination in the World. [http://www.newnownext.com/columbus-ohio-best-destination-nnn-awards/11/2011/](http://www.newnownext.com/columbus-ohio-best-destination-nnn-awards/11/2011/) Plus, it has the longest running classic film series in the U.S., shown at the beautiful Ohio Theater. The Ohio is just one of four historic theaters still in use today, not to mention several other contemporary theater venues or the performances actually held at them. Columbus also recently simultaneously held the titles of best Zoo, Library, and Children’s museum in the nation. Plus, the food. Schmidts, Jeni’s ice cream, the North Market, home of both Wendy’s and Whitecastle, and a thriving food truck and ethnic market community. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/52 "2012-01-03T16:45:20Z")
> [@howye](#): > > Sorry, but Columbus was named 2011 Top Gay Travel Destination in the World. > > [http://www.newnownext.com/columbus-ohio-best-destination-nnn-awards/11/2011/](http://www.newnownext.com/columbus-ohio-best-destination-nnn-awards/11/2011/) > > Plus, it has the longest running classic film series in the U.S., shown at the beautiful Ohio Theater. The Ohio is just one of four historic theaters still in use today, not to mention several other contemporary theater venues or the performances actually held at them. > > Columbus also recently simultaneously held the titles of best Zoo, Library, and Children’s museum in the nation. > > Plus, the food. Schmidts, Jeni’s ice cream, the North Market, home of both Wendy’s and Whitecastle, and a thriving food truck and ethnic market community. Goddamn it. I was just about to come post pretty much this, and you stole my thunder. [Jeni’s](http://www.jenisicecreams.com/) is reason alone to save Columbus, without any of the rest of the stuff. Plus, Columbus has the lightest traffic of any city it’s size I’ve ever encountered. ---
**Author:** ![howye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9adbd/32.png) [@howye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/howye)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/53 "2012-01-03T17:41:43Z")
> [@Drain\_Bead](#): > > Goddamn it. I was just about to come post pretty much this, and you stole my thunder. [Jeni’s](http://www.jenisicecreams.com/) is reason alone to save Columbus, without any of the rest of the stuff. Plus, Columbus has the lightest traffic of any city it’s size I’ve ever encountered. Yet people who have lived here all of their lives will bitch endlessly about the traffic. I grew up in Arlington, TX (50), a suburb of Fort Worth (16) and Dallas (9), and I find this no end of amusement. Possibly one of the best things about Columbus is that at its size, most everything you can want - citywise - is here. If not, you can get it in very short drives to Cincinnati, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis, or Detroit. We don’t have an Ikea, but I can be chowing down on Swedish meatballs in less than 2 hours. We don’t have MLB or NFL teams, but I can see the Reds or Indians almost anytime (hopefully one day Cincinnati or Cleveland will get an NFL team). Note: that Cleveland is 45 on that list and Cincinnati is not even on it shows the folly of looking at city size only instead of metro area. Historical zoning reasons make Columbus the largest city in the state, but the metro area is third at best. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/54 "2012-01-03T18:04:24Z")
Spare Detroit. Finally get a decent NFL team and the Martians are going to take it away? I don’t think so! ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/55 "2012-01-03T18:12:13Z")
I’d suggest the smallest city furthest away from anywhere else - and possibly as downwind from everywhere else as possible. Perhaps one of the southern coastal cities? ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/56 "2012-01-03T19:28:08Z")
> [@GreenElf](#): > > Spare Seattle because it has the Space Needle and Bill Gates who’s probably the closest we have to your ilk. Bill lives in [Medina](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Gates'_house), not Seattle. That’s on the other side of Lake Washington, and too small to be on the list. Of course the [EMP](http://www.empmuseum.org/index.asp) (Experience Music Project and Science Fiction Museum) is in Seattle, well worth saving. ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/57 "2012-01-03T19:38:42Z")
San Francisco must be spared, because it has to be around to house the [Federation](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Federation_of_Planets) legislature. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2012, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/58 "2012-01-03T22:36:00Z")
OK, I’ll give up the chance for a beachfront house. Actually, I’d say you probably don’t want to get rid of Houston and all its refineries unless everyone wants to go back to riding horses everywhere. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/59 "2012-01-04T01:07:34Z")
> [@picunurse](#): > > Bill lives in [Medina](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Gates'_house), not Seattle. That’s on the other side of Lake Washington, and too small to be on the list. One surely has to assume that an destructive event large enough to take out Seattle would take out surrounding suburbs as well, beautiful Lake Washington notwithstanding. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073/60 "2012-01-04T01:42:33Z")
Spare Raleigh so they (along with Durham) can keep crankin’ out cutting edge medical treatments. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-of-the-u-s-s-fifty-largest-cities-is-to-be-destroyed-argue-the-case-that-city-x-not-be-it/608073.md?page=4)