# One way to get ahead in D&D **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [July 31, 2014, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483 "2014-07-31T13:53:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/1 "2014-07-31T13:53:24Z")
Submitted for your entertainment from the [Steve Jackson Games Daily](http://www.sjgames.com/ill/1996/ill-dec96.html) site: > [@](#): > > December 6, 1996 > > An Important Safety Tip! > > Mark Steuer \ recounts this tale: > > Many years ago (back when we all were still playing D & D), I ran a game where I pitted two groups against each other. > > Several members of Group One came up with the idea of luring Group Two into a trap. You remember the _Hand of Vecna_ and the _Eye of Vecna_ that were artifacts in the old D&D world where if you cut off your hand (or your eye) and replaced it with the _Hand of Vecna_ (or the _Eye_) you’d get new awesome powers? Well, Group One thought up _The Head of Vecna_. > > Group One spread rumors all over the countryside (even paying Bards to spread the word about this artifact rumored to exist nearby). They even went so far as to get a real head and place it under some weak traps to help with the illusion. Unfortunately, they forgot to let ALL the members of their group in on the secret plan (I suspect it was because they didn’t want the Druid to get caught and tell the enemy about this trap of theirs, or maybe because they didn’t want him messing with things). > > The Druid in group One heard about this new artifact and went off in search of it himself (I believe to help prove himself to the party members…) Well, after much trial and tribulation, he found it; deactivated (or set off) all the traps; and took his “prize” off into the woods for examination. He discovered that it did not radiate magic (a well known trait of artifacts) and smiled gleefully. > > I wasn’t really worried since he was alone and I knew that there was no way he could _CUT HIS OWN HEAD OFF_. Alas I was mistaken as the Druid promptly summoned some carnivorous apes and instructed them to use his own scimitar and cut his head off (and of course quickly replacing it with the _Head of Vecna_…) > > Some time later, Group one decided to find the Druid and to check on the trap. They found the headless body (and the two heads) and realized that they had erred in their plan (besides laughing at the character who had played the Druid)…The _Head of Vecna_ still had BOTH eyes! They corrected this mistake and reset their traps and the Head for it’s real intended victims… > > Group Two, by this time, had heard of the powerful artifact and decided that it bore investigating since, if true, they could use it to destroy Group One. After much trial and tribulation, they found the resting place of The _Head of Vecna_! The were particularly impressed with the cunning traps surrounding the site (one almost missed his save against the weakest poison known to man). They recovered the _Head_ and made off to a safe area. > > Group Two actually _CAME TO BLOWS_ (several rounds of fighting) against each other argueing over _WHO WOULD GET THEIR HEAD CUT OFF_! Several greedy players had to be hurt and restrained before it was decided who would be the recipient of the great powers bestowed by the _Head_… The magician was selected and one of them promptly cut his head off. As the player was lifting The _Head of Vecna_ to emplace it on it’s new body, another argument broke out and they spent several minutes shouting and yelling. Then, finally, they put the _Head_ onto the character. > > Well, of course, the _Head_ simply fell off the lifeless body. All members of Group Two began yelling and screaming at each other (and at me) and then, on their own, decided that they had let too much time pass between cutting off the head of a hopeful recipient and put the _Head of Vecna_ onto the body. > > _SO THEY DID IT AGAIN_!.. [killing another PC] > > In closing, it should be said that I never even cracked a smile as all this was going on. After the second PC was slaughtered, I had to give in (my side was hurting)… > > And Group Two blamed _ME_ for all of that… > > So let that be a warning to you - don’t let your head get cut off unless you really know what you’re doing. > > – Bob Apthorpe ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/2 "2014-07-31T14:00:14Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > Submitted for your entertainment from the [Steve Jackson Games Daily](http://www.sjgames.com/ill/1996/ill-dec96.html) site: That’s a coincidence - I was just thinking of “The Head of Vecna” story, yesterday, and told my wife about it (and about this story too [Eric & the Dread Gazebo :: DreadGazebo :: Roleplaying Resources](http://web.archive.org/web/20080804140516/http://www.dreadgazebo.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=8)) ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/3 "2014-07-31T14:02:03Z")
It was mentioned in today’s installment of Darths and Droids. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/4 "2014-07-31T16:36:18Z")
Well, it’s a classic of its sort. It gets referenced amongst gamers. It came up in chat in an MMO I play a few days ago, and it’s not even a medieval-fantasy type MMO. ---
**Author:** ![Arkcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Arkcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arkcon)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/5 "2014-07-31T17:32:38Z")
Do try and find the story about the Paladin and the Gazebo. That one is just as much of a laugh riot. You have angered the Gazebo! ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/6 "2014-07-31T17:39:56Z")
> [@Arkcon](#): > > Do try and find the story about the Paladin and the Gazebo. No need to search– **AndyL** linked it in post [#2](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=17596833&postcount=2). ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/7 "2014-07-31T17:42:25Z")
About two months ago I joked about the **Penis of Vecna** as an alternate joke for the players who already know the ‘head’ story. The Head story has one huge flaw. How would anyone expect this isn’t simply resurrecting Vecna while killing yourself? ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/8 "2014-07-31T17:56:37Z")
> [@Arkcon](#): > > Do try and find the story about the Paladin and the Gazebo. That one is just as much of a laugh riot. > > You have angered the Gazebo! Was that from the Knights of the Dinner Table or did they rip it off? Big Bang Theory stole their ‘Does anyone have wood for sheep?’ bit. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/9 "2014-07-31T18:08:02Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > The Head story has one huge flaw. How would anyone expect this isn’t simply resurrecting Vecna while killing yourself? I think it’s pretty clear the characters in question weren’t using any scraps of neural tissue that happened to be in their heads, anyway. Offering munchkin players a suggestion of artifact-level power results in roleplaying and even basic logic going out the window. In one campaign, we had a druid who found a Tooth of Dahlver-Nar that had one power: Mass Animate Dead. A horrible, unnatural power, right? In-character, most druids could be expected to be a bit squeamish about it–anything from grumbling about the party using it to demanding that they find a way to destroy it. As soon as she found out what it was, she undertook to knock out one of her own teeth with a club, so she could stick the Tooth in its bleeding socket. And she used it at every opportunity. If I’d been DMing, there would have been Consequences, but I wasn’t. This would be the same druid who, when fleeing through Lolth’s treasure chambers in the Abyss, was told that if she stopped to loot, she would definitely die. She used her shapeshift to turn into a kangaroo and dive through a treasure pile, hoping to scoop up loot in her pouch without stopping. ---
**Author:** ![duality72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duality72/32/3910_2.png) [@duality72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duality72)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/10 "2014-07-31T18:11:08Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > Was that from the Knights of the Dinner Table or did they rip it off? The [KODT strip](http://www.kodtweb.com/2011/05/20/lair-of-the-gazebo-3/) is based on the original [Eric and the Dread Gazebo](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_and_the_Dread_Gazebo) story. ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2014, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/11 "2014-07-31T18:43:29Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > Was that from the Knights of the Dinner Table or did they rip it off? From what I remember, Jolly Blackburn had secured permission to reprint the story in the KotD issue it appeared in. And the comic he did based on it fell well within the parody part of fair use. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2014, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-way-to-get-ahead-in-d-d/694483/12 "2014-08-01T04:02:30Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > Was that from the Knights of the Dinner Table or did they rip it off? > > Big Bang Theory stole their ‘Does anyone have wood for sheep?’ bit. The “wood for sheep” joke is old hat among boardgamers, possibly dated back to 1995 when _Settlers of Catan_ first came out.