# Online Dating Tropes

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [June 21, 2010, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981 "2010-06-21T14:14:33Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 6

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**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\
**Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/101 "2010-06-22T22:21:56Z")

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> [@Misnomer](#):
>
> One of the things I like about OKC is that you can pick from a range of “…and very serious about it” to “…and laughing about it” when you select your religion (you can also choose to leave the “…and” part blank).

I like this. I may have to investigate it.

> [@Misnomer](#):
>
> (P.S. Hi, Sunspace! :))

Hey, how’s it goin’, eh? 🙂

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**Author:** ![SecretaryofEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@SecretaryofEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretaryofEvil)\
**Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/102 "2010-06-22T22:30:32Z")

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> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#):
>
> The woman whose “I’m looking for…” soon devolves into a denunciation of the entire male population (“I’m looking for a non-sociopathic man who doesn’t drink sixteen beers before lunch, who has the decency to keep his filthy hands to himself sometimes, who doesn’t try to screw every woman over fourteen he meets, who holds down a job at least sometimes, who doesn’t deal drugs out of his car, whose car works at least sometimes…” Like that.)

Hey I sell drugs out of my house, always use hand sanitizer before groping a woman, only try to screw girls over 16 and less than 300 pounds, and rarely consume more than 6-8 shots of whiskey before lunch. I’m in!

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**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\
**Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/103 "2010-06-22T22:48:35Z")

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> [@elfkin477](#):
>
> If I ever posted an online dating profile, I have no idea what I’d say about body type. My measurements are 38"-28"-39" and according to my BMI I ought to lose ~10 pounds, which has collected mostly on my hips and thighs as you probably guessed. “Curvy” means fat, and “a few extra pounds” means fat, so would _I_ say?

Say curvy, and post a full-body shot in an outfit that you think makes you look good.

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**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\
**Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/104 "2010-06-22T23:53:22Z")

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“I’m shy at first but then I’m not”? (usually worded less stupid than that)

“Looking for a man who knows how to treat a lady right”

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**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/105 "2010-06-23T00:39:57Z")

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Just because some curvy people are fat doesn’t mean you can’t be curvy as well. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Flipshod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f19dbf/32.png) [@Flipshod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flipshod)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/106 "2010-06-23T03:08:35Z")

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> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#):
>
> It’s probably correct to find a relationship between “No drama, please!” and those who are drawn to it, but there must be an acceptable way to say “I’m easy-going and flexible, and am looking for someone who won’t read secret meanings into everything I say, or invite me to offer advice on personal issues which will then be perceived as intrusive and insulting, or blame me if plans go awry, but rather will go with the flow, and adapt to situations as they develop” etc.
> 
> What is that acceptable way? I’ve used “No drama, please” as a short-hand but if that gives off “I love drama” vibes, I’ll need to find something else.

I never mentioned drama in my profile, but if I liked someone after a few conversations, I would ask them what they meant about drama. And, yes, it was often just a phrase to ward off weirdos.

The corollary: If you find someone you like, and your profile says No drama, but theirs doesn’t, you say, “I see you didn’t mention not wanting drama. Does that mean you like drama?”😃

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**Author:** ![Chris\_Luongo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7cd45c/32.png) [@Chris\_Luongo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chris_Luongo)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/107 "2010-06-23T05:20:32Z")

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> [@Green\_Bean](#):
>
> **The Myspace Angle** :  
> –An over-the-head camera angle often used by overweight women to hide their double chin and emphazise their cleavage.  
> –Related to: The Kissy Face.

I always thought the correct term for that trick was called the Fat Girl Angle Shot:

[[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat\_Girl\_Angle\_Shot](http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat_Girl_Angle_Shot)](http:// [encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat\_Girl\_Angle\_Shot](http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat_Girl_Angle_Shot))

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/108 "2010-06-23T14:15:48Z")

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> [@Chris\_Luongo](#):
>
> I always thought the correct term for that trick was called the Fat Girl Angle Shot

Thanks for the NSFW link.

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**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/109 "2010-06-23T14:17:07Z")

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> [@MeanOldLady](#):
>
> Thanks for the NSFW link.

Encyclopedia Dramatica is always, always NSFW. Unfortunately, it’s not like it’s a commonly known site.

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**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/110 "2010-06-23T14:18:09Z")

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> [@MeanOldLady](#):
>
> Thanks for the NSFW link.

What she said. The page itself is okay but the banner ads are not. Also, encyclopaediadramatica has serious malware issues.

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**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/111 "2010-06-23T14:43:36Z")

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> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> What she said. The page itself is okay but the banner ads are not. Also, encyclopaediadramatica has serious malware issues.

There’s at least one side-by-side “overhead shot vs. the real thing” down the page a little that is NSFW though hard to see at a distance (topless photo).

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**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/112 "2010-06-23T15:02:21Z")

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> [@Chris\_Luongo](#):
>
> I always thought the correct term for that trick was called the Fat Girl Angle Shot

Yeah, to me the “MySpace angle” just means tilting the camera off from plumb because you think it makes you look artsy.

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**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/113 "2010-06-23T20:25:03Z")

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Before the FGAS and MySpace angles made it big (pun unintended), there was the Glamour Shot (the big hair and huge cowboy hats made chubby faces seem smaller by comparison), posing behind large dogs or bushes, blurry shots from hundreds of feet away, and [posing with a group of much larger friends](http://i842.photobucket.com/albums/zz341/andyphil57/02.jpg) (image SFW, from a deleted spam post on the message board I run).

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/114 "2010-06-23T20:38:15Z")

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See, folks, this is why you just pick up slutty chicks in bars. Done.

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**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/115 "2010-06-23T21:05:51Z")

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I broke **Chris Luongo** ’s link. Please remember we have the two-click rule here for all not-safe-for-work content … and remember to label such links as NSFW.

**Ellen Cherry  
IMHO Moderator**

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**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/116 "2010-06-23T21:47:49Z")

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> [@Ruken](#):
>
> “I’m shy at first but then I’m not”? (usually worded less stupid than that)

This. Yes. At least they’re up front about being high maintenance (“you’ll have to work to get to know me”), I guess.

> [@](#):
>
> _“Looking for a man who knows how to treat a lady right”_

On the flipside, men who think that if they use the word “lady” enough times they’ll get lucky: “I’m looking for that special lady,” “I always treat my ladies well,” etc.

There is absolutely no good reason for this, but I have always disliked “lady” when it’s used that way. Completely turns me off.

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**Author:** ![Flipshod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f19dbf/32.png) [@Flipshod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flipshod)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/117 "2010-06-23T22:34:07Z")

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This is only slightly a trope–not looking for a green card–or whatever the phrase is

I used online dating for about 4 months and by pure accident met my now wife. But I had 2 more months of membership, so I changed my profile to try and maximize the e-mails. So I became a 70-yr-old surgeon looking for a wife from any country to spend my last few years of life with. That worked exactly as you would predict. I also did one where I came across as an awful criminal and even got some hits on that one. But after 2-3 days of that the fun was over, so I closed the account.

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**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/118 "2010-06-23T23:53:12Z")

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I almost forgot about **The Obvious Scammer**. Usually it’s an ad from someone claiming to be a single white female in their late 20s, with a generic profile that includes no references to the city where she lives, a few photos that depicts someone a bit too good looking to be true, and a desired age range that is unusually broad - 18-60 or something similar.

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**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\
**Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/119 "2010-06-24T13:50:46Z")

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> [@Flipshod](#):
>
> This is only slightly a trope–not looking for a green card–or whatever the phrase is
> 
> I used online dating for about 4 months and by pure accident met my now wife. But I had 2 more months of membership, so I changed my profile to try and maximize the e-mails. So I became a 70-yr-old surgeon looking for a wife from any country to spend my last few years of life with. That worked exactly as you would predict. I also did one where I came across as an awful criminal and even got some hits on that one. But after 2-3 days of that the fun was over, so I closed the account.

One time I set up my profile as a fetus. Literally, a fetus in a jar sitting in a lab somewhere. I explained that it would be hard to reply in a timely fashion because my arms weren’t completely developed yet and it’s difficult to type.

I got a number of serious replies to that one.

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**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\
**Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/online-dating-tropes/543981/120 "2010-06-24T14:03:16Z")

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> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#):
>
> I broke **Chris Luongo** ’s link. Please remember we have the two-click rule here for all not-safe-for-work content … and remember to label such links as NSFW.
> 
> **Ellen Cherry  
> IMHO Moderator**

When you break a link for being NSFW, could you leave a note in that post? Right now, it just looks like he screwed up the coding rather than broken to meet the 2-click rule.

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