# ONOZ! Statues Haz Boobies! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 16, 2008, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098 "2008-06-16T13:00:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/1 "2008-06-16T13:00:23Z")
They lauged at Comstock, they laughed at Ashcroft, and now we have someone else to laugh at for the moment: [A Chafed Texan in the Naked City](http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/15/AR2008061502188.html) > [@](#): > > Washington is a town filled with boobs. > > They’re everywhere, from the bare-breasted ladies who decorate the fountain at Dupont Circle to the peekaboo statue in the Justice Department’s Great Hall to the countless nudes in our museums. But while those of us who live here hardly blink at the public nudity, it can shock some of our visitors. Such was the case for Robert Hurt, who last week tried to add the issue of artistic indecency in the nation’s capital to the platform of the Texas GOP… > > The platform committee did not adopt Hurt’s recommendation on Washington nudity (nor his proposal to extend the 22nd Amendment – presidential term limits – to spouses). But Hurt said he’ll pursue the issue, possibly with another trip here to videotape the evidence. “I’m not going to stop until I succeed. I’m prepared for a long fight.” ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/2 "2008-06-16T13:09:21Z")
If he doesn’t want to see a boob, he shouldn’t look in the mirror. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/3 "2008-06-16T13:29:32Z")
The original article I saw reporting this quoted him as saying 20% of the art in the National Gallery of Art were nude. I want to know how he came up with that figure. Did he count them himself? ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/4 "2008-06-16T13:56:30Z")
I’m pretty sure he saw one set of boobies, then mentally affixed them to 20% of the rest of the stuff he saw out of “shock” at viewing a nude. Read this article a few days back, and I have to wonder how this “nudity in all forms should be punished as it’s always sexual and WRONG” mentality comes about. I haven’t really seen it in person before. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/5 "2008-06-16T13:58:07Z")
[QUOTE=RealityChuck] I want to know how he came up with that figure. Did he count them himself? [/QUOTE] Well, we are talking about someone who is considering making a trip from Texas to DC for the purpose of “videotap[ing] the evidence”. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/6 "2008-06-16T14:17:15Z")
[QUOTE=nashiitashii] I’m pretty sure he saw one set of boobies, then mentally affixed them to 20% of the rest of the stuff he saw out of “shock” at viewing a nude. Read this article a few days back, and I have to wonder how this “nudity in all forms should be punished as it’s always sexual and WRONG” mentality comes about. I haven’t really seen it in person before. [/QUOTE] Yet, he has 14 children. What did he do, mail-order them? ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/7 "2008-06-16T14:23:48Z")
He needs an archenemy. Someone who crusades for _more_ nudity in public. Someone who pickets town beatification meetings and sculptors, demanding that statues be naked. He could even hand out literature on the subject. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/8 "2008-06-16T14:32:29Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] town beatification [/QUOTE] St. Louis? St. Paul? 😛 Actually, that’s a pretty good typo considering the subject. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/9 "2008-06-16T14:43:00Z")
From the linked article: > [@](#): > > Returning a few years later, he discovered Arlington Memorial Bridge, flanked by the bare-chested figures of Valor and Sacrifice. > > “The Lady Godiva thing – that’s what it conjured up, and that’s not what our country’s about,” he said. I wonder what he does think our country is about. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/10 "2008-06-16T15:10:10Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] From the linked article: I wonder what he does think our country is about. [/QUOTE] The current administration has been saying for years now that we’re all about Freedom and Liberty. Of course, he keeps using those words and I don’t think they mean what he thinks they mean. But anyway, freedom to have boobies on statues and the liberty to look at them is what the fine men and women of our military have been fighting for for hundreds of years. Obviously this chafed Texan hates America. The terrorists have already won, yada, yada, yada. By the way, why is he chafed? Does it have something to do with all the boobies? ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/11 "2008-06-16T15:11:48Z")
Wasn’t there someone from Texas who got into a swivet on this board on the subject of nudity in art? ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/12 "2008-06-16T15:13:06Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] From the linked article: I wonder what he does think our country is about. [/QUOTE] Probably the hokey pokey. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/13 "2008-06-16T16:43:52Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] From the linked article: “The Lady Godiva thing – that’s what it conjured up, and that’s not what our country’s about,” he said. [/QUOTE] According to the story, Lady Godiva’s motivation was to convince her husband to keep taxes down. If the other Republicans find out that he doesn’t think that’s what the country is all about, they’re gonna kick him out of the party. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/14 "2008-06-16T20:00:18Z")
> [@](#): > > The platform committee did not adopt Hurt’s recommendation on Washington nudity (nor his proposal to extend the 22nd Amendment – presidential term limits – to spouses). What? Spouses can’t stay married more than 8 years? I figure, at the National Gallery, he meticulously counted the artworks. Then he counted the boobies, dividing by two. In the works where he couldn’t tell what was depicted, he assumed nudity and guessed at the number of boobies. In the cubist section, he often reached an odd number. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2008, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/15 "2008-06-16T20:11:37Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] In the cubist section, he often reached an odd number. :eek: [/QUOTE] With some [works of modern art](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nude_Descending_a_Staircase%2C_No._2), you might get a very odd number. (I figure the linked picture is not NSFW, even though it’s a painting of a nude woman, because it’s very hard to tell which, if any, of the circles and ovals in picture are representations of boobies). ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2008, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/16 "2008-06-17T13:12:43Z")
[QUOTE=Giles] With some [works of modern art](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nude_Descending_a_Staircase%2C_No._2), you might get a very odd number. [/QUOTE] Sounds like this guy is getting an irrational number… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2008, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/17 "2008-06-17T18:19:27Z")
With 14 kids, you’d think he’d be too busy providing for them and helping tend to them to have time to do stuff like this. I’d love to take him to the V & A or the British museum or Louvre. What a tool. ---
**Author:** ![ShadowFacts](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shadowfacts/32/2934_2.png) [@ShadowFacts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShadowFacts)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2008, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/18 "2008-06-17T18:28:05Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] He needs an archenemy. Someone who crusades for _more_ nudity in public. Someone who pickets town beatification meetings and sculptors, demanding that statues be naked. He could even hand out literature on the subject. [/QUOTE] Ooh, ooh - I volunteer! You can call me: BOOBIEMAN! I bet my literature will get read more than his… ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2008, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/19 "2008-06-17T20:58:56Z")
Texas! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2008, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098/20 "2008-06-17T21:09:45Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] What? Spouses can’t stay married more than 8 years? I figure, at the National Gallery, he meticulously counted the artworks. Then he counted the boobies, dividing by two. In the works where he couldn’t tell what was depicted, he assumed nudity and guessed at the number of boobies. In the cubist section, he often reached an odd number. :eek: [/QUOTE] I for one am intrigued by his idea of term limits on spouses and would like to subscribe to his newsletter. I like the idea of being required to change spouses every few years. I think society would be a lot more interesting. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/onoz-statues-haz-boobies/453098.md?page=2)