# Open Bar: Tip Your Bartender?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [May 21, 2011, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716 "2011-05-21T20:43:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 15\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/61 "2011-05-23T04:15:09Z")

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Did you know for a FACT that the bride and groom were in on it?  
And for the record, no, it would not bother me. It was their earnings to spend on whatever they wanted. What if they WEREN’T family of the couple, and still gave the money to them? Would you still be all butthurt over it?

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**Author:** ![RedWood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f08c70/32.png) [@RedWood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedWood)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/62 "2011-05-23T04:41:48Z")

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ALWAYS tip your bartender. And your bartender will look after you.

Implicit: what you said.

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**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/63 "2011-05-23T11:49:49Z")

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> [@YaraMateo](#):
>
> No, I wouldn’t be mad at the waitress even if she knew.
> 
> I’m more mad because I feel, as do my friends, that the bride and groom were in on it. I just really feel like “Well, your gift of blank wasn’t enough”, :mad:

If you found out that the bride and groom were not in on it, and were shocked and grateful at the end of the evening when their cousins, who had already donated a whole night’s bartending, walked up and handed them a big bag of cash, would that change your opinion?

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**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/64 "2011-05-23T15:26:30Z")

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If there’s a tip jar, I tip. If there isn’t, then I expect that the host has opted to tip him/her at the end of the evening.

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**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/65 "2011-05-23T15:34:58Z")

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> [@YaraMateo](#):
>
> Well, I feel it shows nerve. That’s why I refuse to tip at open bars.

Freshen that coffee for you, Mr. Pink?

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**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/66 "2011-05-23T16:50:36Z")

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> [@FairyChatMom](#):
>
> A public affair is a different situation, but at a private party, that’s the hosts’ responsibility.

^^This

If you are invited as a guest to someone’s private function, the host of the party should be tipping the staff.

If you are at a public charity event or other type of public event, that you bought tickets to attend, and there is an open bar, then, yes by all means you should tip the staff.

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**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/67 "2011-05-23T16:55:48Z")

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I tip the bartender. Being that I was one myself for many years, I can’t not tip them.

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**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\
**Post date:** [May 23, 2011, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/68 "2011-05-23T17:13:43Z")

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> [@Telemark](#):
>
> Always tip the bartender. Always.

This. Bartenders are wonderful people - they provide us with alcohol, and they need to put up with nontrivial numbers of drunken idiots late at night in order to do it. “Never annoy a bouncer, and always tip your bartender” are the golden rules of drinking, so far as I’m concerned.

Moreover, tipping pays off, especially when other people at an open bar _aren’t_ tipping. If my dolllar or so for each drink gets means I’m not waiting to get the bartender’s attention, and my mixed drinks are strong, then I consider the very modest expense to be well worth it.

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**Author:** ![lindsaybluth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90db22/32.png) [@lindsaybluth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lindsaybluth)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/69 "2011-05-24T00:11:17Z")

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> [@Freudian\_Slit](#):
>
> I’m trying to imagine a tip jar at a fancy affair and am failing. Wouldn’t it look tacky?

I’ve seen some nice ones, like (fake) pewter pitchers and the like.

Always tip, $1 a drink if mixed or a draft beer or $1 for yours and your partners’ drink (at the same time) if it’s just bottled.

If it’s a really big crowd and the line is long or there’s a scrum, I’ll tip $5 the first time so I’m remembered and $1 after that.

> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#):
>
> It also shouldn’t have a big tacky handmade sign taped to it that says “tips”, either.

Right: it should have dollars and $5’s floating around in it. Small and off to the side, but still highly visible.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/70 "2011-05-24T00:45:48Z")

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Yeah, normally around here, I just see them use a pint glass as the tip “jar.”

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**Author:** ![YaraMateo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/58f4c7/32.png) [@YaraMateo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaraMateo)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/71 "2011-05-24T01:09:12Z")

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> [@VinylTurnip](#):
>
> Freshen that coffee for you, Mr. Pink?

Who’s Mr. Pink?

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**Author:** ![YaraMateo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/58f4c7/32.png) [@YaraMateo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaraMateo)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/72 "2011-05-24T01:16:30Z")

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> [@MandaJo](#):
>
> If you found out that the bride and groom were not in on it, and were shocked and grateful at the end of the evening when their cousins, who had already donated a whole night’s bartending, walked up and handed them a big bag of cash, would that change your opinion?

No, it’s still the situation. I think it’s bad form all around. The couple shouldn’t have taken it, because they already got gifts from the people funding it. The cousins shouldn’t have acted like “big men” for giving a gift that was funded by someone else.

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**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/73 "2011-05-24T01:49:34Z")

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for Yara:

- mr. pink is a character from reservoir dogs who didn’t tip.
- i don’t find your outrage to be unwarranted, but i don’t particularly agree with it either.

for the OP:

- there’s a difference between a vessel for tips and a tip JAR. i don’t think a pitcher where people can discard dollars at their discretion is asking too much. as long as it’s not a mason jar with a masking tape label i don’t think guests will be offended.

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**Author:** ![x-ray\_vision](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/x-ray_vision/32/351_2.png) [@x-ray\_vision](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/x-ray_vision)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/74 "2011-05-24T15:29:48Z")

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> [@YaraMateo](#):
>
> Well, I feel it shows nerve. That’s why I refuse to tip at open bars.

You don’t tip at open bars because you think bartenders are probably giving away all **their** tip money because it happened at one wedding you were at?

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**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\
**Post date:** [May 24, 2011, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-bar-tip-your-bartender/582716/75 "2011-05-24T16:51:38Z")

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> [@doreen](#):
>
> I know it wasn’t all going to the barstaff- there were after all waiters and waitresses serving food.But I’m certain it was going to the service staff. I had to bring cash because the employees were going to be given their share at the end of the event. If the catering hall (not hotel, and that may make a difference) was going to pay a higher hourly wage , they would have accepted a check just like they did for the rest of the payments.
> 
> Even if it was going from the hotel to you in the form of higher wages - it’s still going to you and eliminates the most common justification given for the practice of tipping, which is that the tipped person makes a sub-minimum wage.

That certainly sounds more likely it was going to the staff. In my experience that is rare however - the service charge goes to the hotel/hall more often in my experience.

At a wedding or party I tend to tip once per bar. If there’s one bar I will usually give a $20 first time up.

I think you have the causation a bit wrong. I don’t think the justification for tipping is the person getting a sub-minimum wage. The justification for the sub-minimum wage is that they are being tipped. The low wage is though a reason why NOT tipping is a particularly mean thing to do.

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