# Open letter to my creepy neighbor **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 5, 2005, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531 "2005-02-05T16:19:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/21 "2005-02-06T04:04:32Z")
> [@Aesiron](#): > > and live in one of the more secular areas of the country. Thats not what your Location implies. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/22 "2005-02-06T04:14:06Z")
[Who Will Be Eaten First?](http://www.o-ox-ox1.org/cthulhuchick/) ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/23 "2005-02-06T06:02:51Z")
Well there ya go then. Guess I needn’t bother. ---
**Author:** ![J8099](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@J8099](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J8099)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/24 "2005-02-07T14:52:48Z")
> [@Verminary](#): > > Track down the Howard Hallis “Who Will Be Eaten First?” tract and slide it under his door! > [@Jackmannii](#): > > You might consider adding new stickers and a discreetly positioned videocamera. With the evidence, you could either get a nice little small claims court judgment, or enjoy the satisfaction of knowing your neigbors are preaching the gospel down at the county lockup. That’s exactly what I’m going to do. And I’m going to put up a new sign: There Is No Peace At The Gate. Let the bastard scratch his head over that one. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/25 "2005-02-07T16:59:58Z")
> [@Steve Wright](#): > > As a committed Christian, your neighbour clearly desires to be more like Christ in every way. > > You will be pleased to know you can help him achieve his aim. Call the cops, and have him crucified. **Steve Wright** , that’s one of the reasons I love you. As for you, **J8099** if they vandalize something else, may I suggest you leave the pieces on their doorstep with the words, “What you do for the least of my brothers, so you do also for me. Matthew 25” on their doorsteps? It’s subtle, but nasty! CJ ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/26 "2005-02-07T17:23:31Z")
The problem with calling the police is that you have no proof it was your neighbor. They might say “It might have been one my guests, but it wasn’t me”, or “None of my guests did it, they were here all night.” And on the off chance that the cops showing up are some sort of whacko-fundies (as opposed to nice fundies) themselves, they may just side with your neighbor. Yes, that last is highly unlikely, but it’s been known to happen. But at least you begin to create a paper trail, and may just put the **real** fear of Og into your neighbor. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/27 "2005-02-07T17:33:30Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > The problem with calling the police is that you have no proof it was your neighbor. They might say “It might have been one my guests, but it wasn’t me”, or “None of my guests did it, they were here all night.” This is why **J** should invest in a video camera, preferably one activated by a motion detector. Catch 'em in the act! ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/28 "2005-02-07T17:39:33Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > This is why **J** should invest in a video camera, preferably one activated by a motion detector. Catch 'em in the act! Yeah, but then his/her neighbor’s illicit activities will have set him/her back several hundred dollars. Unless the camera can be put to other good uses later, it hardly seems worth it. ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/29 "2005-02-07T20:57:26Z")
> [@gobear](#): > > [Who Will Be Eaten First?](http://www.o-ox-ox1.org/cthulhuchick/) Best. Link. Ever. I now have it hanging in my cubicle! ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/30 "2005-02-07T21:24:05Z")
What a bastard. He was clearly in the wrong in the first place. Even if he became pissed that your music was drowning out his, he totally had no right destroying your personal propery. Can’t you file a charge for that? ---
**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/31 "2005-02-07T21:24:58Z")
I have nothing but sympathy…some Jesus freak rode in on a Jesus horse to my front door, ripped my Ganpati face off it, ripped it into tiny shreds and left me a “ur goin’ 2 hell” tract thing along with the shredded remnants of my Ganpati in a plastic bag. The thing is that I get so many prosletyzation tracts (2 to 3 per day…that’s what you get for living in the foreign student area of campus) that I can’t figure out who it is so there’s no point trying to file a claim and I don’t have time, anyway. I hope whoever did it feels closer to their “God” now that they’ve destroyed one of my heathen idols. ---
**Author:** ![J8099](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@J8099](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J8099)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/32 "2005-02-07T21:37:42Z")
> [@Amazon Floozy Goddess](#): > > What a bastard. He was clearly in the wrong in the first place. Even if he became pissed that your music was drowning out his, he totally had no right destroying your personal propery. Can’t you file a charge for that? I think I know why he did it, and it’s not about the music. See, the jackass is (mostly) pissed because I’m ‘a bad mom,’ letting my kid play with ‘satanic’ toys. And when I laughed in his face, his little weasel mind started plotting revenge. ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/33 "2005-02-07T21:57:44Z")
Doesn’t this qualify for something as serious as a hate crime if you so wanted to be really wounded, and therefore earn them some kind of substantial punishment? Don’t people who vandalize based on race, creed, etc., qualify as hate crimers? I almost said “haters” but after the thread about the definition of “hater” the other day, I thought that would add a little too much accidental street cred to people who are too profoundly unhip to deserve it. ---
**Author:** ![Talon\_Karrde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Talon\_Karrde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talon_Karrde)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/34 "2005-02-07T22:16:57Z")
> [@J8099](#): > > I think I know why he did it, and it’s not about the music. See, the jackass is (mostly) pissed because I’m ‘a bad mom,’ letting my kid play with ‘satanic’ toys. And when I laughed in his face, his little weasel mind started plotting revenge. What are these “satanic toys”? ---
**Author:** ![LadySybil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c89c15/32.png) [@LadySybil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadySybil)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/35 "2005-02-07T22:20:05Z")
I also am curious about these satanic toys. Was it anything like [this one?](http://www.petdiscounters.biz/dog/toys/stuffed/vt_68600_devil.html) :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![J8099](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@J8099](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J8099)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/36 "2005-02-07T22:26:23Z")
> [@LadySybil](#): > > I also am curious about these satanic toys. Was it anything like [this one?](http://www.petdiscounters.biz/dog/toys/stuffed/vt_68600_devil.html) :dubious: No. ---
**Author:** ![J8099](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@J8099](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J8099)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/37 "2005-02-07T22:28:58Z")
> [@Faruiza](#): > > Doesn’t this qualify for something as serious as a hate crime if you so wanted to be really wounded, and therefore earn them some kind of substantial punishment? Don’t people who vandalize based on race, creed, etc., qualify as hate crimers? How the hell is this a hate crime? It’s willful destruction of peronal property, but not a hate crime. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/38 "2005-02-07T22:35:29Z")
You know, I bet that that 2am gospel singing was done specifically for you. The neighbor must have gathered up a bunch of cronies to help save your soul. Haj ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/39 "2005-02-07T23:07:13Z")
> [@J8099](#): > > How the hell is this a hate crime? It’s willful destruction of peronal property, but not a hate crime. Ooookay…first of all, take your attitude and tweak it a little. My comment (question?) was more a tongue in cheek remark than a suggestion that you elevate this shit to the supreme court. I’d be pissed as hell if someone violated my space and broke my things. So, you know what? I don’t think it’s a hate crime, I was trying to sympathize in a misunderstood vindictive way. Forget it. Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![J8099](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c89c15/32.png) [@J8099](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J8099)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531/40 "2005-02-07T23:21:27Z")
> [@Faruiza](#): > > Ooookay…first of all, take your attitude and tweak it a little. My comment (question?) was more a tongue in cheek remark than a suggestion that you elevate this shit to the supreme court. I’d be pissed as hell if someone violated my space and broke my things. > > So, you know what? I don’t think it’s a hate crime, I was trying to sympathize in a misunderstood vindictive way. Forget it. Carry on. Oh…oops! I’m sorry, Faruiza. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/open-letter-to-my-creepy-neighbor/288531.md?page=3)