# Opening Day **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [March 31, 2011, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601 "2011-03-31T04:26:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2011, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/21 "2011-03-31T17:23:10Z")
> [@Major League](#): > > Just a reminder, fans, comin’ up is our “Die-hard Night” here at the stadium. Free admission to anyone who was actually alive the last time the Indians won a pennant. Tiger blood! ---
**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2011, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/22 "2011-03-31T17:31:45Z")
> [@](#): > > Take me out to the Ballgame… -Jack Norworth and Albert Von Tilzer -Repeated by Harry Caray and Countless Others ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2011, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/23 "2011-03-31T17:46:56Z")
> [@](#): > > The Red Sox cannot beat the Rays by outscoring them. Joe Morgan > [@](#): > > You don’t see a lot of guys that have statistical numbers play well in these championship series. Jerry Manuel > [@](#): > > You get so many statistical people together, they put so many stats on paper, and they say, well, if you do this and you score this many runs, you do that many times, you’ll be in the playoffs. > > That’s not really how it works, and that’s what we have to get away from. And that’s going to have to be a different mind-set of the team in going forward. We must win and we must know how to win rather than win because we have statistical people. Jerry Manuel > [@](#): > > Statheads get derided so often, including by me, for seemingly lacking the perspective to appreciate what matters most about being a fan of the game… ElvisL1ves ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2011, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/24 "2011-03-31T23:39:11Z")
Two that showed up in my inbox today. I doubt that either is original, but neither was attributed: > [@](#): > > Opening Day. It’s when the New Year really begins. This isn’t flag day. This is ridiculously huge flag day. It’s more presidential than Presidents Day. This is the day that fathers wish was their day.This is Christmas, but Santa has a black beard and delivers presents nobody want. This one is a bit Giants-specific… > [@](#): > > In the name of the Bat, and the Ball, and the Glove, let us play. > > O Great Creator, we thank you for this Opening Day. We thank you, who have given us the grass and the sky, the sun and the breeze, the gazelle and the water buffalo and the panda. Bless all our comings and goings, our walks and our walk-offs, our bunts and our homers. Deliver us from the hammie and the back spasm, and should we falter in extra innings, bring us to victory the next day. > > We ask this in the name of the Thrill and the Freak; the Buster and the Baby Bull; the Cove and the Archways and Triples Alley. Amen. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2011, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/25 "2011-04-01T00:21:54Z")
R-e-d-s!!! 162-0!! ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2011, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/26 "2011-04-01T01:00:10Z")
> [@](#): > > Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. To last as long as I did with the skills I had, with the numbers I produced, was a triumph of the human spirit. Bob Uecker ---
**Author:** ![MentalGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/439d5e/32.png) [@MentalGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MentalGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2011, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/27 "2011-04-01T03:58:30Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m convinced that every boy, in his heart, would rather steal second base than an automobile. Tom Clark > [@](#): > > There are three things in my life which I really love: God, my family, and baseball. The only problem - once baseball season starts, I change the order around a bit. Al Gallagher ---
**Author:** ![Fred\_Garvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c67d28/32.png) [@Fred\_Garvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fred_Garvin)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/28 "2011-04-02T00:50:14Z")
> [@](#): > > A man has to have goals - for a day, for a lifetime - and that was mine, to have people say, 'There goes Ted Williams, the greatest hitter who ever lived > [@](#): > > The only thing dumber than a pitcher is two pitchers > [@](#): > > If you don’t think too good, don’t think too much Teddy Ballgame ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/29 "2011-04-02T14:19:28Z")
“I see great things in baseball. It’s our game - the American game. It will take our people out-of-doors, fill them with oxygen, give them a larger physical stoicism. Tend to relieve us from being a nervous, dyspeptic set. Repair these losses, and be a blessing to us.” ~Walt Whitman “Baseball isn’t statistics, it’s DiMaggio rounding second.” -Jimmy Breslin “When they start the game, they don’t yell, “Work ball.” They say, “Play ball.”” ~Willie Stargell “Say you were standing with one foot in the oven and one foot in an ice bucket. According to the percentage people, you should be perfectly comfortable.” - Manager Bobby Bragan “Can’t anybody here play this game?” - Casey Stengel “Why does everybody stand up and sing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” when they’re already there?” ~Larry Andersen Anything Yogi Berra ever said. Or, for that matter, Casey Stengel. Or Mickey Rivers. ---
**Author:** ![zoog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7ea924/32.png) [@zoog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoog)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/30 "2011-04-02T18:28:57Z")
[This](http://www.onionsportsnetwork.com/articles/chicago-cubs-cant-believe-theyre-doing-this-again,19870/) gets away from the quote theme that we have going, but I haven’t had a laugh like this in a long time. And yes, I’m a lifelong Cubs fan… ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/31 "2011-04-02T18:49:00Z")
“The other sports are just sports. Baseball is a love.” - Bryant Gumbel, of all people. “Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona.” - George Will ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/32 "2011-04-02T18:57:26Z")
Couldn’t help myself. > [@](#): > > Smalls: I was gonna put the ball back. > Squints: But it was signed by Babe Ruth! > Smalls: Yeah, you keep telling me that! Who is she? > Ham Porter: WHAT? WHAT? > Kenny: The sultan of swat! > Bertram: The king of crash! > Timmy: The colossus of clout! > Tommy: The colossus of clout! > All: BABE RUTH! > Ham Porter: THE GREAT BAMBINO! > Smalls: Oh my god! You mean that’s the same guy? ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/33 "2011-04-02T21:39:50Z")
> [@zoog](#): > > And yes, I’m a lifelong Cubs fan… [Here it is, your moment of Zen.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uv23pqH9iG0) ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2011, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/34 "2011-04-02T21:54:48Z")
[Stengel at his best.](http://www.baseball-almanac.com/quotes/casey_stengel_senate_testimony.shtml) But Mantle topped him. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2011, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/35 "2011-04-03T01:41:38Z")
I’m not gonna link 'em here, but to hear a man insanely in love with baseball, do a youtube search on Tommy Lasorda, and, to a less serious extent, Earl Weaver. The results will be NSFW, but hilarious. Joe ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2011, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601/36 "2011-04-03T11:26:10Z")
Not all the good stuff is of the time of George Will’s boyhood. Ozzie Guillen today upholds the tradition very well. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opening-day/576601.md?page=1)