# Opinion on Asian Customs **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 16, 2020, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652 "2020-11-16T01:27:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Didi44](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Didi44](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Didi44)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/21 "2020-11-16T19:22:30Z")
“My post was meant to fight ignorance. Indeed, the views are those expressed by the artist.” Fair enough. As I said, I don’t believe you meant any malice. However, I’m sure there’s a level of misunderstanding and misinterpretation of the author’s intent. Especially if they were possibly meant to be tongue in cheek or over generalizations. It’s like hearing a joke and thinking it’s absolutely true. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/22 "2020-11-16T19:31:45Z")
Fair enough, I accept that view and possibility of misunderstanding. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/23 "2020-11-16T19:32:48Z")
> [@Didi44](#): > > And how far does this (the more I think about about it, stereotypical list) extend. Eurasia? South Asia? Right. The “Middle East” is West Asia after all. ---
**Author:** ![Didi44](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@Didi44](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Didi44)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/24 "2020-11-16T19:35:51Z")
> [@MissTake](#): > > much less cliquishness at parties or with newcomers - nah, we hate everyone, lol. LOL! Like my parents, I’m super nice to those I like, but completely ignore those I don’t! And yes, I’m an a-hole because I’ll make it obvious who I like and who I don’t! I like you, everything is YES! I don’t like you and everything is NO! ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/25 "2020-11-16T21:02:45Z")
I wonder whether this list is more stereotyping, as opposed to what some call “archetyping”. Whereas stereotyping is done from outside the group, and can easily be derogatory as well as inaccurate, archetyping describes tendencies from a within-group perspective. Comments like “more reluctance to speak the truth” and related mentions about social harmony stood out to me. In an archetypal list I saw relating to African-Americans, there was a prominent item that ran in the opposite direction, the inclination to speak difficult truths rather than hiding the truth just to smooth feelings. IIRC this was described as having come from cultures in Africa and persisting through the slavery period in the US. I like the idea that the group choosing a restaurant would thereby accomplish going to the one most liked by the group. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/26 "2020-11-16T22:56:59Z")
The title of the book is “East” but it is fairly clear she is discussing a view of China (as the book includes the Chinese words). Maybe the original material is better since they might be open to a little interpretation. I wanted to avoid copyright issues, but permission is claimed. > **[The Cultural Differences Between East and West, as Told in Pictograms](https://slate.com/human-interest/2015/10/yang-lius-east-meets-west-pictograms-about-cultural-differences-from-a-chinese-designer-in-berlin.html)** > > Chinese designer Yang Liu moved to Berlin at the age of 13 and experienced the usual shock adapting to life in a new culture. She later channeled her... [http://bsix12.com/east-meets-west/](http://bsix12.com/east-meets-west/) ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/27 "2020-11-16T23:00:37Z")
And, for the sake of completeness, the first book I read. > **[Man meets Woman: Funny pictograms about gender clichés by Yang Liu](https://www.mariefranceasia.com/lifelove/decoding/man-meets-woman-funny-pictograms-gender-cliches-yang-liu-41283.html)** > > Gender stereotypes repeatedly plague society but at least we've got artists to throw a hilarious light onto the issue... ---
**Author:** ![Sepp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@Sepp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sepp)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/28 "2020-11-16T23:22:10Z")
Re : breaking up with one’s non-Chinese partner to marry a fellow-Chinese, per advice of one’s parents. The blatant racist sentiment is explained away as being overly respectful of one’s parents. Besides, you don’t get to inherit the family fortune if you disobey. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/29 "2020-11-16T23:38:23Z")
> [@Mijin](#): > > In public spaces, Chinese people have a kind of tunnel vision where they are just focused on their own goals and their own, very close, physical proximity. > e.g. in terms of the cutting in line thing, you have to appreciate it’s not the same as someone cutting in line in the West. If someone pushes in line in the US, it’s because they’ve decided to be a jerk today and know they are pissing off the other people. In China, many times people didn’t even see that there was a queue. > Note also that having got to the front of a queue, you still need to “impose yourself” on the cashier; they are not looking for who to serve next. > Once you appreciate everyone’s “attention bubble” is much smaller than the West, a lot of things make much more sense. I know just about zero about Asian culture. But what you describe here is also very much NYC culture. At least compared to the culture in the other US good-sized cities. I suggest it’s simply a reaction to population density. Both at the individual and at the cultural level. ---
**Author:** ![Pleonast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pleonast/32/1183_2.png) [@Pleonast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pleonast)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/30 "2020-11-16T23:45:27Z")
> [@Napier](#): > > I wonder whether this list is more stereotyping, as opposed to what some call “archetyping”. Whereas stereotyping is done from outside the group, and can easily be derogatory as well as inaccurate, archetyping describes tendencies from a within-group perspective. I think there’s generalizations of both Westerners and Easterners. I’m not sure it rises to the level of racism, but I could see offense being taken. Depending on who considers what behavior to be virtuous. ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2020, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/31 "2020-11-16T23:59:32Z")
Readers may enjoy EvaComics: I can’t find much online (maybe facebook?), but there is a selection here: [I Show The Cultural Differences Between Japan And Other Countries (30 Pics) | Bored Panda](https://www.boredpanda.com/comics-cultural-differences-japan-evacomics/?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic) and particularly [Eva, Kopi and Matcha: Neo, Evangeline: 9789810910686: Amazon.com: Books](https://www.amazon.com/Eva-Kopi-Matcha-Evangeline-Neo/dp/9810910681/ref=pd_lpo_14_t_2/143-7865599-1153241?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=9810910681&pd_rd_r=09213d11-b9c0-41b2-83e8-bd4d03adff9a&pd_rd_w=kU5YN&pd_rd_wg=R95n9&pf_rd_p=7b36d496-f366-4631-94d3-61b87b52511b&pf_rd_r=YRANF289SX012VJYAH16&psc=1&refRID=YRANF289SX012VJYAH16), where she explores (in 2 or 4 frames) the differences between Japan and Singapore. Hint: after visiting Japan, it was a relief to me to be back in Singapore, where no-one is more polite than I am. > [@Dr\_Paprika](#): > > talking about money by emphasizing relationships The Malaysia/Singapore Chinese I am related to, talk about money by talking about money. How much did you pay? ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/32 "2020-11-17T01:15:04Z")
The standard disclaimer–as others have posted above: there is no one “Asian culture”. Asia is a mighty big place and there are a lot of different cultures here. - more reluctance to speak the truth - networking much more important - inability to queue - smiling though feeling sad - much less cliquishness at parties or with newcomers - more respect of seniors - similar ideals of beauty - going “around”, not “through” problems - talking about money by emphasizing relationships - counting by bending, not extending, fingers - sleeping with the windows closed - showering at night - enjoying rainy days more Mind you, those are all just my personal opinions formed from my personal experience. I think the entire list posted in the OP is pretty much what a number of folks in Asia want to be true about Asia. It’s kind of a badge of honor, I guess, if it were all true. ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/33 "2020-11-17T02:53:28Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > what you describe here is also very much NYC culture. At least compared to the culture in the other US good-sized cities. > > I suggest it’s simply a reaction to population density. Both at the individual and at the cultural level. Yes I had the same thought. Basically if you grow up in a city where almost everywhere is crowded, then human bodies can basically become background noise. As I say, it’s not just queuing (which as mentioned above, is improving in many Chinese cities) but e.g. people will walk into you in the street, only noticing you and dodging at the last possible second. Similarly for road “safety”. People will also stand in places that will block other people; nobody minds, they just find a way to get round or tell the person to move. In my country (the UK), people would be slightly annoyed that you didn’t look first to see whether you would be blocking people. But…if you go to London, it’s still more British culture than “crowded place” culture. So I would agree with you, but add that it’s not _only_ a population density thing. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/34 "2020-11-17T04:33:19Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I know just about zero about Asian culture. But what you describe here is also very much NYC culture. At least compared to the culture in the other US good-sized cities. 🤨 No it’s not. Someone cutting in line here in NYC will absolutely be thought of as a jerk and will be told to get to the back of the line (probably with several “fucks” interspersed in there.) ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/35 "2020-11-17T11:05:05Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I know just about zero about Asian culture. But what you describe here is also very much NYC culture. At least compared to the culture in the other US good-sized cities. > > I suggest it’s simply a reaction to population density. Both at the individual and at the cultural level. Tokyo and Osaka are, I suspect, every bit as densely populated as NYC. And yet Japanese folks don’t behave like that. > [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Bear in mind that Asia is not homogeneous. Hard to get around this one. To the average American, Japan and China are indistinguishable, and all of those other little Asian countries - Nepal, Tibet, Thailand, Singapore, Malaysia, and so many, many others - don’t really register in their minds at all. Looking for common traits among Asians is like looking for common traits among North Americans (i.e. Canadians, Americans, and Mexicans) or Africans. ---
**Author:** ![cytop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f17d59/32.png) [@cytop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cytop)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/36 "2020-11-17T11:31:21Z")
Wondering if Monty’s “constant conflict with people who insist on sleeping with the window open” is somehow related to the fact that his wife is Korean? 🙂 That was the one that got me in Korea… **Fan death** is a belief that running an [electric fan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mechanical_fan) in a closed room with unopened or no windows will cause death. Despite no concrete evidence to support the concept, belief in fan death persists to this day in Korea, and also to a lesser extent in Japan ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/37 "2020-11-17T11:38:17Z")
I’m South Asian, not East Asian but a lot of these cultural traits ring true to what I know from friends. And at least some of them are shared by South Asians. “Respect for elders” is so well known as a cultural trait that it’s kind of a cliche now. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/38 "2020-11-17T11:39:42Z")
And Asians don’t form lines. That one is painfully true. The old ladies are very aggressive and will unapologetically barge right ahead of everyone else. That’s just the way it’s done. It’s a free-for-all. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/39 "2020-11-17T12:39:56Z")
Yeah, as expected this thread is just an excuse to post _man those non westerners are weird_, like it was a 1920’s travel book. In my experience westerners are, without exception, lousy at cross cultural communication.You come across East Asians, South Asians, Middle Easterners, Africans etch who are bad, but you will find good ones as well. Westerners, to my surprise, as illustrated in this thread, even when they understand the concept of cultural differences on an intellectual level, can not grasp it in practice. Maybe it comes from being the dominant culture last few centuries and not needing to worry about it. Maybe in a few hundred years our descendants will say the same thing about Picturn Islanders? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2020, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652/40 "2020-11-17T13:01:39Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > 🤨 No it’s not. Someone cutting in line here in NYC will absolutely be thought of as a jerk and will be told to get to the back of the line (probably with several “fucks” interspersed in there.) Agree the deliberate cutting in line part is not acceptable in NYC. But sometimes people do blunder into the middle of a line. They’ll learn about their mistake from the rest of the crowd pronto. But they still make it occasionally. At least IME. > [@cytop](#): > > **Fan death** is a belief that running an [electric fan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mechanical_fan) in a closed room with unopened or no windows will cause death. Wiki even has a specific article on [**Korean Fan Death**](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fan_death) and the special fans sold there to ward off this danger. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinion-on-asian-customs/925652.md?page=3)