# Opinions...2nd try
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [September 19, 2011, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795 "2011-09-19T05:57:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 11
### Author:  [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2011, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/201 "2011-09-23T13:16:07Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> I laughed, but once you finish college any explicit or thinly veiled reference to your penis on a T-shirt is douchey.
Generally I would agree with you, but I thought this shirt is an exception.
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### Author:  [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2011, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/202 "2011-09-23T14:26:05Z")
I found the t-shirt funny. I wouldn’t call it douchey, but there’s a bit of immature humour to it, so I’d expect it to only be worn in really casual situations, like at a bar, the gym or the beach or something.
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2011, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/203 "2011-09-23T14:35:34Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#):
>
> Even given the circumstances?
I am not prepared at this point to excuse otherwise douchey behavior because you’re in a wheelchair. Like I said, though, I laughed, so maybe I’m also a douche. 😃
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2011, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/204 "2011-09-23T14:41:29Z")
I filed the “It still works” t-shirt under “gimp humor”, which is not something that appeals to everyone and, indeed, some would find the name I used for it offensive as well.
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### Author:  [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2011, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/205 "2011-09-23T15:11:56Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#):
>
> Douchey? Really? I thought it was great when I had it made and I still get a kick out of wearing it in public. And many _ **do** _ tend to automatically assume that if a guy is in a wheelchair, then there probably isn’t much going on “down there”. So I made a joke out of it.
This makes it seem less douchey and actually a little more touching, actually.
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### Author:  [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/206 "2011-09-24T14:51:52Z")
You remind me of Adam Levine. I \*hate \*Adam Levine!😃
(Well, I do hate him but not because of his looks.)
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### Author:  [@LurkerInNJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkerInNJ)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/207 "2011-09-24T18:32:01Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#):
>
> This makes it seem less douchey and actually a little more touching, actually.
It’s inappropriate. It’s making other people unwilling participants in your sex life.
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### Author:  [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/208 "2011-09-24T18:42:08Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#):
>
> You remind me of Adam Levine. I \*hate \*Adam Levine!😃
>
> (Well, I do hate him but not because of his looks.)
:eek:
Bite your tongue, woman. There’s no comparison here. Adam and his ilk will turn my head any day of the week. Jamie not so much, even fully clothed and with the dog.
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/209 "2011-09-24T18:56:52Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#):
>
> It’s inappropriate. It’s making other people unwilling participants in your sex life.
You have _ **got** _ to be kidding me. :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@LurkerInNJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkerInNJ)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/210 "2011-09-24T22:21:38Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#):
>
> You have _ **got** _ to be kidding me. :rolleyes:
No.
:rolleyes: and I raise you another :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/211 "2011-09-24T23:42:46Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#):
>
> It’s inappropriate. It’s making other people unwilling participants in your sex life.
A reference to your sex life is hardly forcing someone else to take part in your sex life.
I think it’s a little lame but it makes me feel bad for the guy, that he’s got this insecurity about his sex life/genitalia.
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/212 "2011-09-24T23:55:29Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#):
>
> No.
>
> :rolleyes: and I raise you another :rolleyes:
So wearing my tshirt is akin to sexual abuse? I am not _ **forcing** _ anyone to do anything. Just like if I were to wear a Jewish kippah (sp?) out in public, I wouldn’t be _ **forcing** _ the Jewish faith onto anyone; I would simply be _expressing_ my faith. (if I were jewish, that is)
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/213 "2011-09-24T23:58:32Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#):
>
> So wearing my tshirt is akin to sexual abuse?
Nobody said that, or anything even remotely resembling that.. L2read for comprehension.
I’m not offended by the shirt or anything, I just think it’s about as appropriate to wear outside as [this one](http://static.customizedgirl.com/images/design/d25a497730ffde9d5e61d70cbd1be6a0_1062511_0_big.jpg) is.
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2011, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/214 "2011-09-24T23:58:48Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#):
>
> A reference to your sex life is hardly forcing someone else to take part in your sex life.
>
> I think it’s a little lame but it makes me feel bad for the guy, that he’s got this insecurity about his sex life/genitalia.
It’s not an insecurity at all. It’s (the shirt) a product of years of living in a chair and experiencing the world through the prism of a paralyzed young man and (trying) to express both the frustration and humor that such a life brings.
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/215 "2011-09-25T00:00:02Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#):
>
> So wearing my tshirt is akin to sexual abuse? I am not _ **forcing** _ anyone to do anything. Just like if I were to wear a Jewish kippah (sp?) out in public, I wouldn’t be _ **forcing** _ the Jewish faith onto anyone; I would simply be _expressing_ my faith. (if I were jewish, that is)
..
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/216 "2011-09-25T00:02:45Z")
> [@Lord\_Ashtar](#):
>
> Nobody said that, or anything even remotely resembling that.. L2read for comprehension.
>
> I’m not offended by the shirt or anything, I just think it’s about as appropriate to wear outside as [this one](http://static.customizedgirl.com/images/design/d25a497730ffde9d5e61d70cbd1be6a0_1062511_0_big.jpg) is.
I would say “forcing someone to be an unwilling participant in your sexlife” is most certainly “sexual abuse”.
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/217 "2011-09-25T00:12:11Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#):
>
> I think it’s a little lame but it makes me feel bad for the guy, that he’s got this insecurity about his sex life/genitalia.
More accurately, _other people_ have an “insecurity” about the sex life of the disabled.
On _more than one_ occasion people have asked me why I married a man who couldn’t have sex. WTF? Seems there are a LOT of people who have the default assumption that disabled=non-functional penis. I didn’t really _how_ many until after I got married to someone disabled.
Keep in mind, too, that my spouse isn’t in a wheelchair and thus doesn’t look as disabled as\*\* Jamie,\*\* yet these people were _still_ somehow convinced he couldn’t have sex. I can only assume it’s worse for wheelers rather than walkers.
I have a cousin who married a quadriplegic. Lots of people refuse to believe he’s the biological father of his children.
Of course, there _are_ some unfortunate people who can’t have sex - my spouse has a friend who fell off a cliff and among other things damaged the nerves that run the sex organs, which is most unfortunate. However, you can’t tell just by looking at someone if the equipment works or not, regardless of whether they’re walking or wheeling or limping or whatever. Yet people still make assumptions.
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### Author:  [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/218 "2011-09-25T00:12:50Z")
> [@LurkerInNJ](#):
>
> It’s inappropriate. It’s making other people unwilling participants in your sex life.
What are you doing lurking in a thread like this? And look at what you’re wearing. Don’t be coy; you wanted it.
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### Author:  [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/219 "2011-09-25T00:16:21Z")
> [@Broomstick](#):
>
> More accurately, _other people_ have an “insecurity” about the sex life of the disabled.
>
> On _more than one_ occasion people have asked me why I married a man who couldn’t have sex. WTF? Seems there are a LOT of people who have the default assumption that disabled=non-functional penis. I didn’t really _how_ many until after I got married to someone disabled.
>
> Keep in mind, too, that my spouse isn’t in a wheelchair and thus doesn’t look as disabled as\*\* Jamie,\*\* yet these people were _still_ somehow convinced he couldn’t have sex. I can only assume it’s worse for wheelers rather than walkers.
>
> I have a cousin who married a quadriplegic. Lots of people refuse to believe he’s the biological father of his children.
>
> Of course, there _are_ some unfortunate people who can’t have sex - my spouse has a friend who fell off a cliff and among other things damaged the nerves that run the sex organs, which is most unfortunate. However, you can’t tell just by looking at someone if the equipment works or not, regardless of whether they’re walking or wheeling or limping or whatever. Yet people still make assumptions.
I love it that you are here. 😉
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [September 25, 2011, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/opinions-2nd-try/596795/220 "2011-09-25T00:23:33Z")
_::: kiss, kiss :::_
Now, **Jamie** , be a dear and go threaten to run over the toes of the Big Meanies in the threads on poverty who tell me (though, _of course_, not in so many words) I should abandon my disabled husband as a liability because he can’t work anymore. Apparently I’m not intimidating enough. 😃
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