# Oral sex, WTF !!!TMI!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 1, 2005, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109 "2005-08-01T08:07:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/21 "2005-08-01T16:30:35Z")
> [@PhoenixFire](#): > > \ things that make me see it as weird are the facts that there isn’t too much i can do while receiving. Um, a slight TMI warning for those who prefer not to have such things described for them… Still here? Okay. Things to do whilst receiving oral sex from a partner: 1. run your fingers through her hair 2. fondle her breasts 3. If you’re lying on the bed while she’s performing, have her turn so you can reach her for manual stimulation 4. perform oral sex on her concurrently 5. should your mouth not be occupied otherwise, be vocal and appreciative. > [@](#): > > the best sex that can ever be had is when both parties are 100% focused on the others pleasure with no thought for their own.\ Sex at your house must be very labor intensive. Do you have a union? The best sex, IMO, is when both partners are aware of each other enough to recognize that there are times when it’s wonderfully relaxing to simply be on the receiving end, just as it’s terribly gratifying to be on the giving end. Both do not have to occur at the same time, but turn about is fair play. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/22 "2005-08-01T16:35:47Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > I also know about as many who never gave or received oral sex in over 20 years of marriage and one who gave and received on her wedding night (which was also her first penetration but not his). Wow. Just wow. I could not live without oral sex. Call me shallow, but it would be a deal-breaker for me if my woman didn’t perform it. (And, of course, I love performing oral sex on a woman.) I would actually say I enjoy it more than sex. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/23 "2005-08-01T16:42:19Z")
I’ve never been much of a giver on the oral sex. I do it sometimes, but it’s not part of my daily repetoire. I’ve told my fiance that I’ll do it if he asks, but he never really pushes the issue. And he goes down on me just about every time we have sex. This has been the case with most of my sexual relationships. I’m just lucky, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/24 "2005-08-01T17:08:36Z")
I’m not really into receiving, but my SO loves giving, so when he wants to I generally go along with it. I don’t mind giving, though it’s not really my favorite thing – however, the reactions I get make it worthwhile. He LOOOOOOOOOOVES it. ---
**Author:** ![Mint\_Julep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc79bd/32.png) [@Mint\_Julep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mint_Julep)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/25 "2005-08-01T17:23:50Z")
I am the odd duck the other way I guess, When I am in a committed relationship with a man, I love to give…much more than I love to receive. The only time I like to have it done to me, is after a long bath…Cleanliness is a must for me to enjoy! ---
**Author:** ![PhoenixFire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/cc9497/32.png) [@PhoenixFire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhoenixFire)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/26 "2005-08-01T17:48:53Z")
> [@FaerieBeth](#): > > Sex at your house must be very labor intensive. Do you have a union? The best sex, IMO, is when both partners are aware of each other enough to recognize that there are times when it’s wonderfully relaxing to simply be on the receiving end, just as it’s terribly gratifying to be on the giving end. Both do not have to occur at the same time, but turn about is fair play. True I guess, I can just relax and go with the flow, generally when i am told to. reciprocity ensues latter. Too many guys are focused on sex as a form of pleasure for them not the other tha ti have had some fairly dissapointed female friends. I’m also slightly neurotic about longevity. I really am so focused not to finish before them that it borders on… i don’t know something scientific… In high school and college i (for reasons un known to me) was privy to almost all of my friends sex lives in detail. Too many of my female friends were complaining about not being satisfied at all that it kind of got beaten into my head ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/27 "2005-08-01T17:56:50Z")
In preface, I find that BJ’s feel good and I certainly don’t think they are weird. However, they don’t really do it for me. I have only climaxed once from a BJ and that was after a very, very, prolonged session of oral sex and an almost unpleasant _willing of the orgasm_. I think they are very sexy, extremely pleasurable, and very arousing and I have had my fair share of them (all good), but it’s official status in my book is stictly as foreplay due to my inability to climax from them. I don’t believe it is psychological, but more a lack of friction and incomplete coverage. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/28 "2005-08-01T18:25:17Z")
Same here. I love them, but don’t climax from them. But boy does a good BJ torque me up for the main event! ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/29 "2005-08-01T19:11:07Z")
> [@An Arky](#): > > Same here. I love them, but don’t climax from them. But boy does a good BJ torque me up for the main event! This is interesting. I’ve been very much the opposite. I come easily from BJs, but regular sex just goes on and on and on to the point I generally get numb and give up on the idea of coming. I mean, if I want to come from regular sex, it has to be within the first 15 minutes or else it just kinda stays hard, but gives up on climaxing. Hmm… Plus, I can only seem to come when I enter the woman from behind, or if she’s on top. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/30 "2005-08-01T19:27:24Z")
God, you’re just _weird!_😃 Eh, everybody’s butter melts a different way. It’s all good! ---
**Author:** ![Meaty\_Beaty\_Big\_and\_Bouncy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Meaty\_Beaty\_Big\_and\_Bouncy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meaty_Beaty_Big_and_Bouncy)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/31 "2005-08-01T20:17:14Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > I know quite a few women who gave their first wifely BJ as a second anniversary present When it comes to gifts, blowjobs are always the right size. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/32 "2005-08-01T20:51:57Z")
> [@An Arky](#): > > Same here. I love them, but don’t climax from them. But boy does a good BJ torque me up for the main event! I quote this merely because I’m certain I couldn’t have said it any better myself. 🙂 Feels great, very much a turn-on, and I’ve felt myself thinking I was close at times, but never gotten there all the way. Although, that could also be due to my wife’s lack of desire to have population paste projected prodigiously at her pearly whites. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![PhoenixFire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/cc9497/32.png) [@PhoenixFire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhoenixFire)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/33 "2005-08-01T21:24:37Z")
> [@Asimovian](#): > > population paste projected prodigiously at her pearly whites. 😃 bravo bravo you have made my day _hands asimovian a cookie_ ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/34 "2005-08-01T23:55:55Z")
> [@PhoenixFire](#): > > But i can’t wrap my mind around BJ’s My friends tell me it’s because i’ve never had one properlly done, and i will admit my experiance is limited. I think your friends are probably onto something. I’ve known a couple of women who never quite managed to work it out, and with them I’d just as soon skip the whole thing. A funny thing, because if a woman is totally put off by cunnilingus (and, believe it or not, I’ve met a couple of those, too) it’s a total dealbreaker. Several breaks for a bit of oral are absolutely necessary. Unlubricated jimmies go a long way toward making this a mutually pleasant thing. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2005, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/35 "2005-08-01T23:58:32Z")
This is going to be way TMI. But here goes. I enjoy giving it… two guys who swore they’d never been able to orgasm with oral alone (“so don’t bother trying to make me, it’s okay sweetie, we’ll just switch to regular sex when it’s time”) have blown up quite unexpectedly in my face. On repeated occasions. My husband brags about his wife’s “abilities” to his work buddies (argh). I’d love to say I know what I’m doing… I’ve watched many a porn, read many a manual, studied the classics and bought books on “erotic massage”, combined them all and hoped it worked. It always works. But in the end, you know something? I don’t truly know what I’m doing. However, I think the key is enthusiasm, communication, and a willingness to learn something new. I use my hands and breasts as well as my mouth, and not just on his penis. He, too, will often stroke my hair, or reciprocate in some way, though sometimes when I feel like giving him a real treat, I tell him to just lay back, put his hands behind his head, and let me work my magic. That usually involves a full body massage and can lead to some pretty intense orgasms. Sometimes oral sex just leads easily into regular sex, but it makes it more intense than just starting out “dry”. As for me being on the receiving end, again, the key is enthusiasm, communication, and willingness to learn. One guy I was with just seemed to know exactly what to do all the time… another guy actually tried that “licking the alphabet” trick, and though I tried to be kind, when he wouldn’t listen to my suggestions about what I wanted, I just laid there and tried not to laugh - it tickled! My husband is a good man - he listens. He’s always willing to learn. Read about things you might like to try, then talk to your partner about it. For oral sex to be truly enjoyable, you must both enjoy it, as pretty much everyone here has already suggested. Some people may simply not enjoy it, ever. And that’s fine, as long as you and your partner care for each other, and understand and respect each others sexual expectations. Communication: I highly recommend it. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![phungi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phungi/32/395_2.png) [@phungi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phungi)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2005, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/36 "2005-08-02T02:27:36Z")
> [@FaerieBeth](#): > > Things to do whilst receiving oral sex from a partner: > > 1. run your fingers through her hair > 2. fondle her breasts > 3. If you’re lying on the bed while she’s performing, have her turn so you can reach her for manual stimulation > 4. perform oral sex on her concurrently > 5. should your mouth not be occupied otherwise, be vocal and appreciative. let us not forget: 1. SportsCenter ; ) ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2005, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/37 "2005-08-02T04:05:47Z")
I prefer receiving oral to intercourse by a slim margin. I enjoy giving too, but I’ve not done it very often due to various factors. It would be just my luck, though, to start dating someone and hope to get a bit more practice in, and have him be someone who doesn’t really care to receive. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Oregon\_sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/50afbb/32.png) [@Oregon\_sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oregon_sunshine)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2005, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/38 "2005-08-02T05:15:38Z")
OMFG I cannot B-leev u do not like ORAL SEX!!!11!!!1!OMFGLOLROTFLMAO!!!1!11!1! ---
**Author:** ![BadBadger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BadBadger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BadBadger)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2005, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/39 "2005-08-02T10:02:52Z")
**FaerieBeth** took the words right out of my mouth, so to speak… ---
**Author:** ![Tamryne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3e96dc/32.png) [@Tamryne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamryne)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2005, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109/40 "2005-08-02T13:37:19Z")
Maybe its just because the oral I have recieved has been clumsy and not that exciting (it was, dare I say, rather boring) but I have to add my vote to the not that into intercourse opinion. A nice sensual massage, on the other hand… Ive never had anyone complain about my BJ’s however, which is good I guess. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oral-sex-wtf-tmi/315109.md?page=3)