# Orange Alert--Are You Sufficiently Terrified? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 7, 2003, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503 "2003-02-07T17:33:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/1 "2003-02-07T17:33:37Z")
They’ve upped the alert to Orange, noting that “soft targets are especially at risk” (my tummy is doomed). But I just don’t know if I am scared enough—I mean, I’m scared, but am I _Orange_ Scared? From what I understand, these are the stages: **Green** —humming goofily to yourself and grinning **Blue** —eyes darting side to side, but still humming **Yellow** —antsy and jumpy; lack of carefree humming **Orange** —hair on end; “long-tailed cat in roomful of rocking chairs” stage **Red** —running in circles screaming and shouting I’d say I’m still at Yellow, though I have been known to hum from time to time, which would sorely disappoint President Bush. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/2 "2003-02-07T17:38:54Z")
Since I’m surfing at work, I’m firmly ensconced in the Blue level. :: Alt+Tab, quick! :: Perhaps I should upgrade and seal myself inside the house this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/3 "2003-02-07T17:43:19Z")
Try at all costs to avoid the Brown level. ---
**Author:** ![In\_Conceivable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@In\_Conceivable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/In_Conceivable)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/4 "2003-02-07T17:44:01Z")
I am **Green** today because it is Friday. I was **Red** yesterday. I can’t really imagine the whole nation being on **Orange** at the same time. I am not sure there is enough hot chocolate in the country to calm us all down. ---
**Author:** ![Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/ebca7d/32.png) [@Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Violet)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/5 "2003-02-07T17:44:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*Try at all costs to avoid the Brown level. \*\* 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/6 "2003-02-07T18:04:45Z")
I won’t be nervous until we are at “Uh-oh, Big Blinding Flash Of White” alert. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/7 "2003-02-07T18:17:10Z")
Orange = “High” I’ve obligingly tried to adjust myself to match this schema, but paradoxically, I’m now as calm as can be. I guess that’s because I pressed the “Green button” to make the adjustment. Next time I’ll have to find some sort of impure stimulant with an orange tinge to it, so that my “High Alert” consists of an appropriate level of jaw-clenching, trembling, and nervous sweating. Or I could watch _Connie Chung Tonight_ – which is correctly colour-coded and ought to induce the expected results. I think it takes a longer exposure to it before your teeth fall out and you develop a profound paranoid psychosis, too. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/8 "2003-02-07T18:23:08Z")
Maybe we could use color coded smilies so we won’t be so scared. :rolleyes: :Low ☹ :Guarded :dubious: :Elevated :o :High :mad: :Severe Curious…all seem pretty appropriate. Ya don’t think they were on the board when coming up with the colors, do ya? ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/9 "2003-02-07T18:31:21Z")
I’m scared, orange you? ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/10 "2003-02-07T18:34:49Z")
This is what Eve is talking about. Careful all, Police state at work. Safety Update Number 36 February 7, 2003 Homeland Security Advisory System Elevated to High Condition (Orange) (High Risk of Terrorist Attacks) The Federal Government, through the Homeland Security Advisory System, has elevated the protective status of all Executive Branch agencies against risk of terrorist attacks to a High alert status - Orange - raised from the previous status of Elevated, or Yellow. As part of moving from a lower status of protection alert to a higher one, federal agencies are required to implement corresponding protective measures to offset the increased threat level to reduce vulnerability to attack and increase response capability during heightened alert periods. ---
**Author:** ![xenothrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/7ab992/32.png) [@xenothrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenothrope)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/11 "2003-02-07T18:36:58Z")
cite anyone? ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/12 "2003-02-07T18:41:05Z")
> **[MSNBC News - Breaking News and News Today | Latest News](https://www.msnbc.com/)** > > MSNBC breaking news and the latest news for today. Get daily news from local news reporters and world news updates with live audio & video from our team. ---
**Author:** ![Skerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Skerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skerri)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/13 "2003-02-07T18:42:51Z")
Ya know, I swear a couple of years ago someone did a study that said if you paint your walls in your common room orange and hang out in there long enough, it would raise your psychotic tendancies. I tried searching for it, but I can’t find it anywhere. Maybe I’m just crazy. I’m physically unable to be terrified right now. This head cold is making everything a big blah. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/14 "2003-02-07T18:42:53Z")
Here you [go](http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/02/07/threat.level/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/15 "2003-02-07T18:44:19Z")
I’m in suburban Chicago, which I think is far enough away from stuff the bad guys are interested in. However, I don’t think it will be long before we draw first blood and incite a big-assed terrorist event. Bush has the foresight of a fuckin’ Mayfly. I am not feeling very orange at the moment, but I’m sure it will change. ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/16 "2003-02-07T18:53:49Z")
I guess I better go grocery shopping this weekend then. If all hell were to break loose, I don’t think the few cans of Spam I have at home will do me any good. ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/17 "2003-02-07T18:56:22Z")
That’s the problem with this whole War on Terror. I don’t feel especially terrified. I haven’t for quite some time. Maybe that would be different if I lived in a big city or something, but I feel like being worried about terrorism is like being worried about being hit by an asteroid. What can I possibly do about it? There’s no reasonable precaution I can’t take that I don’t already take. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/18 "2003-02-07T19:05:53Z")
Jesus—that’s the worst _kind!_ ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/19 "2003-02-07T19:10:30Z")
> [@](#): > > Curious…all seem pretty appropriate. Yikes! That **is** spooky. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503/20 "2003-02-07T19:20:36Z")
Hey, maybe Cheney is a Doper! Shh…we’ve been infiltrated… Perhaps I’ve said too much. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/orange-alert-are-you-sufficiently-terrified/153503.md?page=2)