# Origins of "It's better to have loved and lost ..."

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [October 21, 2012, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443 "2012-10-21T19:09:43Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![IceQube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@IceQube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IceQube)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443/1 "2012-10-21T19:09:43Z")

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Who first said/wrote it?

Poison?

Sam Butler?

Alfred, Lord Tennyson?

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**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\
**Post date:** [October 21, 2012, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443/2 "2012-10-21T19:34:16Z")

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Seems [Alfred Lord Tennisball](http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/62650.html) is the origin.

P.S. Google is your friend…

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**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443/3 "2012-10-22T00:02:21Z")

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> [@Hail\_Ants](#):
>
> Seems [Alfred Lord Tennisball](http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/62650.html) is the origin.

That said, Sappho wasn’t too far off: _“I know that in this world man cannot have the best; yet to pray for a part of what was once shared is better than to forget it.”_

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**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443/4 "2012-10-22T01:18:47Z")

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nm…

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**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2012, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/origins-of-its-better-to-have-loved-and-lost/638443/5 "2012-10-22T03:05:27Z")

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> [@Hail\_Ants](#):
>
> Seems [Alfred Lord Tennisball](http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/62650.html) is the origin.

Yes, from [_In Memoriam A.H.H._](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_Memoriam_A.H.H.). In that context, Tennyson was talking about the death of a close friend (not a breakup with a girlfriend).