# Other Fucking Message Boards that Suck Major Ass! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 13, 2013, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247 "2013-05-13T18:08:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2013, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/81 "2013-08-18T07:30:45Z")
> [@russian\_heel](#): > > Lets not suck each others dicks yet, while well policed this Board suffers from its share of trolls, idiots, self conceited keyboard “tough guys”, snark-board piñatas and abuses by moderator pets. As for “cool and hip” well for the most part the photo threads tell you all you need to know about THAT. If, after the two months your join date indicates you’ve been here, you think the goal here is reciprocal fellatio, you’ve thoroughly misunderstood. Not that there’s something wrong with reciprocal fellatio, but it’s not the goal of the majority of participants here. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2013, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/82 "2013-08-18T13:12:18Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Can’t stand goats, but squids are _delicious!_ Wha?? Goat is also delicious! Man, a good curried or jerk goat is a wonderful thing. ---
**Author:** ![DWMarch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwmarch/32/1010_2.png) [@DWMarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DWMarch)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2013, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/83 "2013-08-19T10:01:12Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > a sack full of assholes with the good ones picked out. I apologize but I must steal this. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2017, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/84 "2017-03-24T22:59:13Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Wha?? > > Goat is also delicious! Man, a good curried or jerk goat is a wonderful thing. You jerk the goat. I don’t like to go that way! ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2017, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/85 "2017-03-24T23:39:17Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Personally, I’m going for the Sea-Dooing Weiner Dog! Are there any dachshund boards? ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/86 "2017-03-25T00:00:52Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > You jerk the goat. I don’t like to go that way! I’m hoping this means you got your car question resolved sometime in the four years since the last post? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![russian\_heel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f05b48/32.png) [@russian\_heel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/russian_heel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/87 "2017-03-25T00:13:28Z")
Theres all kinds of whacko Boards out there. I remember 10 years ago going on a pet fish forum with a few questions about being a first time owner. “YOU ARE KILLING AND TORTURING YOUR FISH!!!” and “YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED MORE BEFORE BUYING A FISH!!!” were among the more assholish replies. Keep in mind I brought home some sort of guppy in a little fish bowl from Petco, not an endangered sturgeon. By the end of my thrashing I felt lower than a Chinese tiger park keeper. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/88 "2017-03-25T00:18:26Z")
And how long did it live, murderer? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/89 "2017-03-25T01:49:28Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > I’m hoping this means you got your car question resolved sometime in the four years since the last post? 🙂 Oh, Hell yeah! I can revive that rotten zombie, too! Still drivin’ that mother-fucker, even as Diabolical as it is. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/90 "2017-03-25T03:26:48Z")
I’d still have my Volkswagen bus if it hadn’t been for Great Duct Tape Famine of '74. ---
**Author:** ![russian\_heel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f05b48/32.png) [@russian\_heel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/russian_heel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/91 "2017-03-25T06:41:15Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > And how long did it live, murderer? Eh, year or so, tops. It seemed happy enough. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![CosmicManiac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85e7bf/32.png) [@CosmicManiac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CosmicManiac)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/92 "2017-03-25T07:01:06Z")
One really good message board that I go to is [usmessageboard.com](http://usmessageboard.com), which is pretty self-explanatory by the name. It’s an online message board where people go to discuss and debate current events and political issues of importance in the United States, and there is a pretty high membership of conservatives, as well as liberals. I joined there a few days ago, and became a supporting member (15$/year), getting some new perks. The difference between this board and that one, is that while there are liberals at that board, there are also a large number of conservative members including myself, so it’s not so damn one-sided. That site also has better smilies, allows you to have cool profile pictures and whatnot, a lot easier to quote multiple users when writing a response, and so on. It is a fucking message board, but it doesn’t suck ass, it’s awesome. Just my two cents. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/93 "2017-03-25T07:37:35Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > You jerk the goat. I don’t like to go that way! Is the board’s time keeping function wacky or is this a really weird post to resurrect a 4 year old zombie with? ---
**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/94 "2017-03-25T09:27:12Z")
> [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > Try reading political comments on a newspaper website. > > I weep for humanity. **The amount of misinformation and outright lies could power a starship.** I may have to steal that. Brilliant. eta (Even if it is a zombie comment :smack: 😃 :smack: ) ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/95 "2017-03-25T11:08:56Z")
> [@The\_Librarian](#): > > Is the board’s time keeping function wacky or is this a really weird post to resurrect a 4 year old zombie with? Maybe it took him that long to decide whether or not he WAS the sort of person that could jerk a goat. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/96 "2017-03-25T12:56:26Z")
Since OP resurrected the thread, I can respond to the first post: > [@Gatopescado](#): > > The typical exchange goes something like this: “Hi Everyone! I just got a Blah Blah and have this specific problem “X”. How do I fix it? Thanks!” > > Mr. Dickweed responds thus: “Well, you clearly need to do project “Z” before even thinking about “X”. Looking at the photo you posted, it is clear you have the wrong window trim for that year, and that radiator cap is a joke! Get your shit together. Here are pictures of my Blah Blah. Please try to aspire.” I know the type. $10 and a coffee says Mr. Dickweed _bought_ his Blah Blah as it was, and has zero sweat equity in it. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/97 "2017-03-25T14:53:24Z")
Okay, this thread got me to browse a few other boards back in the day, and its resurrection got me to try a couple more. My IQ dropped twenty points. I may have to watch William F. Buckley and Dick Cavett trade obscure puns for an hour to get it back up. I have never been more proud of this place. Even The Pit is a frickin’ think tank compared to some of those boards. And thank Og for no images! One poster on a Mac troubleshooting site included huge photos of his kids with every post, and would keep posting even if no one replied to his OP. So I think I saw 80 pics (@400x300 pixels) of his kids-who-clearly-did-not-want-dad-taking-yet-another-creepy-snapshot. Compared to that, an annoying sign-off line doesn’t seem so bad… Regards, digs ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/98 "2017-03-25T16:00:53Z")
Since this thread got resurrected, here’s a cosmic up yours to all the arrogant jackholes on tech-related boards whose purpose is to berate questioners for being dumb, or to insert their crank beliefs into unrelated discussions. Example: it is less than helpful to someone looking for Mac-based software to manage a consumer electronics product to suggest Windows software - and when politely reminded that you need a Mac solution, to respond with “Ha, Macs Suck hurr hurr hurr!” I have basically given up on all such boards. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/99 "2017-03-25T16:17:56Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > …when politely reminded that you need a Mac solution, to respond with “Ha, Macs Suck hurr hurr hurr!” > > I have basically given up on all such boards. Exactly my experience on the Mac Troubleshooting Board I mentioned. I quoted my BIL, an IT guy with Xerox who supports PCs and Macs, and the first arschluck that replied claimed that my BIL was lying to me. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2017, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247/100 "2017-03-25T19:03:53Z")
> [@digs](#): > > My IQ dropped twenty points. I may have to watch William F. Buckley and Dick Cavett trade obscure puns for an hour to get it back up. > > Regards, > digs Ha! I watched a PBS program about the rivalry between Gore Vidal and Buckley, and as soon as I was able to figure out what the two were saying to each other, busted out laughing! Buckley throws some serious fucking shade on Vidal’s book, saying (paraphrased as close as I can recall), _“Give satisfaction only to sadist homosexuals and challenges only taxonomists of perversions”_ (Consults dictionary) Oh, SNAP! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/other-fucking-message-boards-that-suck-major-ass/658247.md?page=6)