# Our cat’s note to my son **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 2, 2017, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933 "2017-06-02T15:42:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/1 "2017-06-02T15:42:01Z")
[This is Ash](http://imgur.com/gallery/YBaes), named after the legendary Ashley Williams. Goofy. Exuberantly full of love. More tolerant and good natured than the oldest, comfiest blanket. Incredibly soft; double-take soft, with a decadent curly texture. Very dog-like — came when you called, played fetch, always followed us from room to room when we moved around (even liked licking my face when he was happy). Absurdly friendly. Exudes so much love that it’s worth mentioning twice. Truly a benchmark pet. I’ve been writing my son a little lunch note and story every day for a couple years now, ever since he started kindergarten (er, shameless request for [help with that here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=827497)) . I never missed a single day. Even when we travelled on school nights, I wrote and left notes behind with his grandparents. But Ash was having a rough go at it and asked if he could take over just this once: > [@Ash ... Housewares](#): > > Hello Samuel, > > It’s me, Ash — your kitty brother. A while ago I asked dad if I could take over note-writing for a day. He was a little hesitant, but I reminded him that I’d probably be leaving soon and that May 24th was my birthday (did you know that?), so he granted me this wish. > > I remember the first time I saw you. You hadn’t been home more than a few hours when your mother had you up on the white spinny machines to take off your litter box (by the way, why do you humans walk around wearing litterboxes?). I’d been shooshed out of the room at first, but I knew I had to see for myself what all the fuss was about. > > It was the most wonderful thing I could have imagined! All pink and wrinkly and just oozing with delight. I dove head-first (heedless of mom’s gasps) and gave you the biggest, warmest, softest head-butt I could muster. And you gave me such love in return. Even when you couldn’t do more than drool, you made me so happy. > > One of the best moments of my life was your first word. Not “daddy,” not “mommy,” not “candy” or “milk” or even “no.” Certainly not “flibbertigibbet!” I was down on the floor with you giving you rubs and purrs when you looked me straight in the eye, smiled, and said “kitty.” It was so clear. I was the first person you spoke to. I tell you, mom and dad were pretty excited but that was nothing compared to how proud and wonderful I felt that day. What a moment! > > We’ve had some great times, you and I. Your first attempts at playing with me were a bit difficult — you sort of just chased me around and stuffed a feather in my face. But you learned to play; we learned to play together. > > Yeah, such great times we had, so many cherished memories. Like hugs. Neither Teal’c nor Flo’Lrrr liked hugs. Your father would raise a fuss. But you never hugged too hard for me, and I loved every single one of them. That was something special that only you and I shared. > > You’ve grown so much! I’m glad you got big enough so that I could finally fit fully on your lap. It was a bit bony and lumpy and rickety at first, but I didn’t care; I got to take a snooze in the best place I could imagine. And yeah, most nights I went into either mommy or daddy’s blanket tunnel to sleep. But boy did I treasure those times when they let me snuggle up next to you. > > Speaking of growing big enough, I really want to thank you for taking care of the boxes with dad. I know it wasn’t fun, and so I appreciate that you held your nose and helped out. That was nice and all, but it was more than that: First, did you know that until you started helping, dad never cleaned the litter boxes so often or so regularly? (There’s a secret for you: you know grown-ups don’t like doing chores either, but did you know that they sometimes skip them?) Until you started helping out, sometimes the boxes would get all icky and uncomfortable. And second, what I’m really grateful for was that you took the time to make sure the litter in every new box was carefully massaged and set up just right. It always felt so good on my paws. > > And speaking of things that people (and kittens) don’t really like to do, I want to apologize for all those times I peed in your room. Especially for peeing in headquarters and making the entire box smell. And on your bed. And the blankets. And on the Daddy Station. And on your toys. And on your clothes. And on … oh geeze, I’m sorry that I got so carried away. I hope you’ll forgive me. > > And yeah, about getting carried away. I’m very old now (pets age so much faster than people) and it’s my time. I love you Samuel, and I had a much happier life because of you. > > I am leaving, but I will never be truly gone. Whenever you think you see me out of the corner of your eye or think you hear me, the will-o’-the-wisp may disappear but I’ll be in your heart. > > You will never, ever take a hot shower without thinking of me and knowing that I’ll be in your heart. > > It will never be just “whipped cream,” or “dessert topping.” It will always be “Ash’s Treat.” When you’re in your 20s your friends will give you funny looks for calling it that. You will call it that to your children, and you will call it that to your bewildered grandchildren. It doesn’t matter. When you’re 90 you will still call it Ash’s Treat, and whenever your have it you will think of me and I’ll be in your heart. > > And no matter how much time passes, no matter who else comes to join the family, no matter if you’re 50 living in the city with nine pets of your own, whenever you leave the house there will be times when you want to call out “Ash is in charge!” I’ll be with you then. > > I’ll be with you in silliness, whenever something rhymes with pizdashik (and even when they don’t). > > We were — and always will be — mommy’s curly blue-eyed boys. When the light is just right, the colour of your eyes will reflect mine. > > I will always be in your heart. > > I love you. > Ash > > (signed with a paw print) ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/2 "2017-06-02T15:51:29Z")
I’m not crying, you’re crying! ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/3 "2017-06-02T16:00:49Z")
We had a wonderful, caring vet come to the house. Brought the Little Man home from school. We were quite a scene. Wife said one of the most brilliant things I’ve ever heard. As things hit a fevered pitch of banshee-shaming misery, she said “he can’t leave us like that; it’s not right. We should sing him Happy Birthday.” I’ve never sang it with so much passion before. What was a macabre, dark coincidence became a heavenly cathartic release. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/4 "2017-06-02T16:07:02Z")
This made me cry, of course. But I need to say, having the vet come to the house for our Rocky was such a great choice. Made the whole thing much less traumatic for us and for him. Highly recommended. And – good on you for taking such great care of Ash. (My Rocky’s favorite treat was whipped cream too.) ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/5 "2017-06-02T16:13:07Z")
_sniffle_ ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/6 "2017-06-02T16:41:42Z")
That’s beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/7 "2017-06-02T17:02:15Z")
Okay, I had to let the dust subside. **Rhythmdvl** , you are a talented writer. That letter was beautiful. Based just on that letter and on [this story](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=796009), IMO you are one mind-blowingly awesome fucking dad. Your kid, your wife, your cats and all of us at the Straight Dope Message Board are lucky to have you around. Please continue being excellent. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/8 "2017-06-02T17:50:13Z")
Okay, that’s just too sad. I’m sorry for your loss. What a good, handsome cat you are, Ash. StG ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/9 "2017-06-02T18:38:20Z")
I can’t handle this. You continue to be a paragon of good parenting. And I am so sorry about Ash. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/10 "2017-06-02T18:41:28Z")
Ugh, losing a pet is so damn hard. That was a beautiful letter. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/11 "2017-06-02T18:49:07Z")
Wow. Awesome letter. I am crying. Condolences to you and your family on the loss of a wonderful family pet. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/12 "2017-06-02T19:01:55Z")
I needed a good cry. Thank you. What an expression of care and love for your son. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/13 "2017-06-02T19:11:30Z")
Don’t make me cry at work! Thanks for sharing, and I’m terribly sorry for your loss. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/14 "2017-06-02T20:50:27Z")
Oh, shit, I wasn’t expecting that. I can’t even see to type. What a beautiful letter and tribute. I’m so sorry about Ash. I looked at your wonderful pictures and he looks and sounds like he has a larger-than-life personality. I can’t imagine the void in your lives particularly during these difficult times for your family. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/15 "2017-06-02T21:54:11Z")
Wow, thank you so much for the cathartic relief. I’d been up with Ash for about two days straight and gotten a bit loopy in the misery. Cacklely loopy in a macabre sort of way. It wasn’t the Pietà so much as the Pietpàw. Came unglued about three or four in the morning when I realized I was hearing it as [Walk Meowt in the Morning Dew](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGmg_PALJXs).” Strange days. Glad I was able to pull it together in the morning to put that on paper. Lucky, too — I’m typically an awfully slow writer and that’s when I’ve had time to dwell on things. It wasn’t a last-minute decision sort of thing by a long shot, but some things you don’t even begin to think about until you have to. Thanks for the compliments on the dad thing. I’ve had a blast with him throughout; making up stories and giving away balloon animals at festivals was good training. Now that he’s in for so much sorrow on such little shoulders, I want to keep that snowglobe of childhood magic shaken up as long as possible. That was the hardest thing about the Knight. He was supposed to protect him, keep him feeling safe and secure in the home. But Daddy Magic creates calliopes and clowns; it can’t cure. I can hug, but I can’t mend. In between times I can entertain. We’re lucky her scans have been clear for the past six months, and darkly lucky that she was with us for this. (Er, not that it’s obvious from context, but my wife/his mom was diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer last March). Did I mention that intestinal cancer was at the heart of Ash’s downfall? Yeah, someone up there has a horribly morbid sense of humour. We kind of appreciate that. Don’t like it, but at least understand. Or not. And katT is so right about the home. It’s not the kind of thing that’s easy to bring up to someone with a merely sick pet, and it’s certainly much more difficult if someone is trying to decide what to do. But just know an at-home visit may be possible (if it’s here in our rural corner of the woods it’s probably pretty wide spread), and if so, it is a completely different experience. Nothing makes it easy, but not making it harder is surely a great thing. Again, thank you for the relief. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/16 "2017-06-02T22:00:05Z")
Oh man. That’s a beautiful thing. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/17 "2017-06-02T22:49:22Z")
Awwwww… :: cries. :: ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2017, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/our-cat-s-note-to-my-son/787933/18 "2017-06-02T23:44:04Z")
Oh my, that was just wonderful. Horridly sad, but wonderful. Thankyou.