# Outrageous lies about the previous poster.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [May 5, 2007, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875 "2007-05-05T13:03:21Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 52
### Author:  [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1021 "2007-05-28T16:03:22Z")
**essell** is the world’s main baguette smuggler, moving millions of baguettes across borders with his well-coordinated and tightly controlled bread ring. Recently, reports of sales of illegal sourdough and multigrain loaves have appeared in the press, indicating that **essell** ’s operation has started to branch out into non-baguette baked goods.
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1022 "2007-05-28T16:21:51Z")
**Scribble** did not expect this post to involve baguettes and is sorely disappointed that it does.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1023 "2007-05-28T16:35:36Z")
**Lord Il Palazzo** sereved time on Devil’s Island for smuggling Italian bread into France.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1024 "2007-05-28T16:43:55Z")
[QUOTE=Dr. Rieux]
**Lord Il Palazzo** sereved time on Devil’s Island for smuggling Italian bread into France.
[/QUOTE]
There is a Mafia contract out on **Dr. Rieux** for smuggling bagguettes into Italy.
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### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1025 "2007-05-28T16:45:41Z")
**Dr. Rieux** has uncontrolable giggle fits every time he reads or hears the word baguette.
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1026 "2007-05-28T16:55:21Z")
[QUOTE=Lsura]
**betenoir** enjoys starting rumors about himself. The most recent involved him with President Bush and Hillary Clinton, and included baguettes as an integral part of their dastardly plan.
[/QUOTE]
Hey! I say again I am not a him. I do not have a penis _checks again_ Nope still not there. But I’ve already been accused of being Hillary Clinton and she might have a penis.
I know why Dr. Rieux giggles at the reference to baguettes but I’m too much of a lady to discuss it.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1027 "2007-05-28T16:55:36Z")
\*\*swampbear \*\* has a baguette in his pocket and he isn’t glad to see me.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1028 "2007-05-28T16:56:56Z")
\*\*betenoir \*\* has stopped shoplifiting baguettes and has switched to salamis.
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### Author:  [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1029 "2007-05-28T17:02:56Z")
**Dr. Rieux** makes his own soap out of kitten fat.
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1030 "2007-05-28T17:04:12Z")
Well since you left me I had to turn to salmies ☹
And they were much better than you 🙂
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### Author:  [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1031 "2007-05-28T17:07:13Z")
**Beware of Doug** doesn’t know the difference between soap and soup.
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### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1032 "2007-05-28T17:07:37Z")
**Beware of Doug** has a standing order for **Dr. Rieux’s** kitten soap.
**Betenoir** is in the midst of a gender identity crisis. 😛
**Dr. Rieux** lost his shirt marketing “Cream of Soap” soup.
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### Author:  [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1033 "2007-05-28T17:10:15Z")
[QUOTE=swampbear]
**Betenoir** is in the midst of a gender identity crisis. 😛
[/QUOTE]
While I could apologize for the confusion, I’m much too distracted by stories about **swampbear’s** declaration of Naked Time followed by the dash through the Mall of America.
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1034 "2007-05-28T17:19:48Z")
**Lsura** is indeed easily distracted by the idea of naked time. This is because **Lsura** lacks genitalia and is thus fascinated by the chance to observe those belonging to others.
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### Author:  [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1035 "2007-05-28T17:28:21Z")
**Lord Il Palazzo** was born on Isle de la Cité in 1033 c.e. to a nobleman and his well-borne wife, Guurte.
Bitten by a therewolf in 1052 whilst hunting boores in the local cafe’s, he has spent the last 975 years searching for a soul-mate and hunting partner.
The Straight Dope seems to be the most likely place to find one, hence his subscription.
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### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1036 "2007-05-28T17:29:32Z")
**Cartooniverse** is still upset that tulle has never caught on as a fabric for men’s pants.
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1037 "2007-05-28T17:35:14Z")
**Swampbear** , on the other hand, makes his own pants out of sandpaper stitched together with old shoe laces. So as not to damage his furnature, he always leaves the rough side facing in.
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### Author:  [@essell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/essell)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1038 "2007-05-28T17:35:33Z")
**swampbear** won’t leave the house without wearing something in Tweed.
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### Author:  [@Miscue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miscue)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1039 "2007-05-28T18:06:58Z")
Essell refuses to quit drinking and has made peace with the fact that his or her alcoholism may ruin an otherwise untarnished career as an oyster shucker.
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### Author:  [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)
#### Post date: [May 28, 2007, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1040 "2007-05-28T18:20:57Z")
[QUOTE=Miscue]
Essell refuses to quit drinking and has made peace with the fact that his or her alcoholism may ruin an otherwise untarnished career as an oyster shucker.
[/QUOTE]
**Miscue** and **Lord Il Palazzo** have managed to infiltrate [Harmony](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harmony_%28Passions%29) and are are both sleeping with Theresa.
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